Help! I Looked Better When I Was Fat!

Cheryl G.
on 10/3/11 5:00 am - Davenport, IA
Hello and Blessings,

I have a major issue that I've pretty much kept to myself for a good while now. It concerns my sabataging my own weight-loss efforts due to my appearance - having loose skin and stretchmarks! I'm proud of getting healthier thru having had wls, and by following my doctor's diet and exercising program. However, I'm embarrassed by how my body looks on the outside! If my body looks the way it does now after a 150 lbs weight loss, how is it going to look minus the remaining extra 75 lbs! Exercise has done all it's going to do for my skin! I've been using a whole host of creams, lotions, and potions to fade the stretchmarks. Unfortunately there hasn't been much improvement! I tell myself that looks really don't matter but now that I'm at a more socially acceptable weight and look pretty good in my clothes, men notice me and at times even approach me for my number! I'm so insecure about my body that I run in the opposite direction! Sometimes even literally!

So lately I've been journaling and I had a real "Come to Jesus Meeting" with myself! I've been subconsciously sabotaging my efforts to lose the remaining 75 lbs that I need to lose but blaming my inability to reach my goal on everything else! I hope this doesn't sound too vain! I never thought I'd care so much about something like this but my "fat" body actually "looked" better then my smaller body is turning out to look like! Unfortunately I don't have the luxury of having plastic surgery at this point! Any supportive words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated? I just need to gain some perspective!

Cheryl G.

(deactivated member)
on 10/3/11 5:25 am
Cheryl, I am sorry you are having such a hard time accepting your new body.  My insurance company stated they will not pay for reconstructive surgery after weight loss surgery.  My surgeon submitted the pictures and they did cover the skin removal of my belly.  If you have insurance, I would suggest locating a reconstructive surgeon who is willing to submit pictures to your insurance company and ask for help with the removal of the skin.

Good luck and try not to be so hard on yourself.

on 10/3/11 10:46 am
I fully understand Cheryl.  I love to swim and always wore a two piece swim suit.  I was fat but solid.  Now I am not so fat but have lots of loose skin.  I am healthier, look younger, can do a lot more.  When fully clothed and girdled down, I look better than a brick house. 

Do I want it all YES.  Since I can't have it, a girls just gotta not worry and be happy that the weight it gone.  The skin is just a reminder that if not careful the fat will fill up. 

Don't hold on to those 75 lbs just let them go.  You won't be sorry.  It may take some time but we will one day be in a position to get rid of the loose skin too.
Take care,

 With  I will succeed.
HW: 280 - LW: 190 - GW - 180  
Unfilled 8/15/11 - WT:  209
1st Fill 11/29/11 - WT: 215.5 - 3cc
2/20/12 - New Goal - Get n Onederland
2nd Fill 4/26/12 - WT: 224.0 - 3cc

on 10/4/11 2:29 am
Start saving for your plastic work now so that by the time you reach your goal you can have your work done. 
Salty Pickle a.k.a.  Lee
200 PoundsGone
on 10/4/11 4:03 am
Cheryl, God bless your heart.  I was just speaking to my husband about the same thing.  I have always struggled with why I have had such a hard time getting it together to finish dropping the remainder of this weight.  The sagging skin did not bother me either up until I loss over-150 and of course I am not getting any younger so the thought has been consuming me a lot.  I take Zumba and can tell it has helped in many places but there is just so much working out can do for so much skin.  Right now I am focusing on dropping the remainder of the weight need so I can have my surgery consult and see what areas we can tackle so I can begin to enjoy my new body.  I think it is wonderful you are keeping a journal.  That is an excellent idea, I may need to adopt the same routine.  I embrace you sister because I know it is not easy to come out and share certain things mainly when you feel like you may be viewed in the wrong light.  I promise you, you are not alone.  There is a strong fight within in you and you shall see this through and it will me another milestone crossed once all is said and done.  Use this time of what you are feeling and what you are going through to build your self to where you need and want to be.  Hugs


Come follow me on Instagram @200poundsgone
HW: 420.. Maybe more
413 (7/14/2005
260 (6/10/2010)
260 (09/28/2011)- No Weight Loss but the inches are dropping OFF *ZUMBA BABY*
204 (06/02/2013)- In the BEST shape of my life. Addicted to FITNESS



MSW will not settle
on 10/6/11 2:40 pm
Exercise improves muscle tone but not skin.  Unforunately, this is one of our reminders of our long term obesity.  I see it like a penalty.  We did this to ourselves and now its a trade off we have to live with.  Choose good health or firm skin.  

We got used to our fat bodies because that is what we've known for so long.  When naked the mounds and rolls of fat, the oversized pendulous breast, the big bellies, the hanging bulging pannis, the huge thighs crammed together, and the mis shapen dimpled butts common to morbid obesity are not a pretty sight.  Our fat naked selves likely did not look nearly as good as we think.  Dressing well and carrying the fat gracefully is no different than looking good with the excess skin bound by our clothing. 

Its a matter of persective.  You learned to admire your fat self even though you were no one's idea of a centerfold or swimsuit model.  That has not changed its just different.  You can learn to love this version of yourself too. 

Personally I would not give up this turkey neck, flabby belly, bat wings, sagging thighs and even the sagging back skin I call my angel wings.  More positives comes with this sagging body than with the former round bulging bouncing body. 

Give yourself some  time.  This is a big adjustment.  You will eventually gain that perspective you seek. 

                   MSW   Roux-En-Y Gastric Bypass: Eat sensibly & enjoy moderation  

 Links:  Are you a compulsive eater?  for help OA meets on-line Keep Coming Back, One Day At a Time  Overeaters Anonymous 


Cheryl G.
on 10/13/11 5:35 pm - Davenport, IA
  Hello again and Blessings to One and All,

I just want to say.................................................................................................................,
Thank you!
Thank you!
Thank you!!!
I so needed to receive the unconditionally positive feedback that I have here in this forum. Everyone's responses were so very candid and so very supportive - just what I was needing!  At the end of the day, I felt that if I was having some issues over the way my body looked sans clothing, surely other folks might feel or have felt the same way.  Now that I know why I've been reluctant to lose the excess 75 lbs, I will work hard toward resolving my negative body image issue(s). As most all of y'all have said, I need to learn to accept my much healthier body as it is and as it's going to be once I've made it to my goal weight.  

In the meantime, I will keep working on saving up for having some plastic surgery in the future!  I give thanks to God for this most incredibly awesome, life-affirming journey that I, like the rest of you - my strong, proud, beautiful Sisters and Brothers have chosen to go on!  This much I know, no matter what may come our way, we are all capable of making it to goal and of thriving well beyond that most monumental milestone!
I wish you all Peace, Love, and Happiness!
Cheryl G.

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