vent: HATE when people warn me that I'm losing too much weight.

yes4Jess
on 8/6/11 1:38 pm - somewhere, MI
:(  It kinda hurts my feelings because I feel liek they are telling me I look BAD. I KNOW that for my family and people close to me it's just about them not being used to me looking this way but I wish they could understand how messed up I feel..... yea I look "normal" but I still feel fat and I have people telling me I'm gouing too far and that I look gaunt and its making me CRAZY!! this is ahrd enough without all of that!  I weigh 165 I am 5'5 there is NO WAY I am underweight. I'm really annoyed. I want people to just leave me be.  I LIKE being this size and I dont care if I dont lose anymore but I suspect I will. I'm 10 months out tomorrow (sunday) I  sure do hope I mentally catch up eventually but right now I feel like a crazy person!!!  
5'5" HW-344 (10/4/09) SW-295 (10/7/10) CW-161 GW-144
Never give up, Never surrender! ~Galaxy Quest

First person to tell me I took the "easy" way out is getting a black eye!
      
(deactivated member)
on 8/6/11 2:08 pm - Beverly, NJ
You are doing amazing!! Don't listen to em. just let it slide in one ear and out the other.
This is actually one of my biggest fears. I have know WLSers almost my whole life so I know what it's like to watch someone "fade away". When I was able to step back and really think about why I felt that way about them I realized it's because I was so used to seeing them big when in all actuality they were a healthy weight now and looked good!
My family and I have talked about how I'm going to look to them and they understand. I'm afraid of what others might say though and thats when we need to stick together and remember. We look good damnit. I'd rather have those comments and be healthy then be "pleasantly plump" and sick!
LovableLynn
on 8/6/11 3:05 pm - Qatar
I believe alot of those comments may also come from jealousy. Instead of congratulating you on your weight loss, the jealousy demon tries to bring you down. Let it go in 1 ear and out the other.

I am just beginning my journey and already I am getting it from friends as I approach being smaller than them. It used to bother me alot but now I just turn the other cheek.

Regardless of the thick skin we try to wear, it still does hurt.... and this is why we have our OH family to help us through these hard times.

Congratulations on your success. You are an inspiration for us newbies!!!!

           
HW 175 KG (385 lbs) - then banded in 2008 - DS journey HW 146 KG (322 lbs)

CW 81 KG (179 lbs) - GW 79.5 KG (175 lbs)
 

(deactivated member)
on 8/6/11 3:10 pm, edited 8/6/11 3:13 pm
DS on 02/01/12
I'm not telling anyone that I'm having surgery, so when I begin losing weight, they're going to start freaking out. I'll tell them after a year or so. The people closest to me will obviously know (my husband, aunt & grandmother who are like my mothers, etc), but no one else other than that. I can only imagine the snarky remarks that will get passed around the family. I imagine rumors about me being anorexic, bullemic, or on drugs. The gossip would still happen even if everyone knew I was having WLS, so the fact that they don't know won't change anything. Someone always has to rain on your parade. Please don't let it get to you. People generally tell you to "stop losing weight" when they see you getting smaller, they aren't, and they feel threatened by your success.

PS: You are an absolute inspiration to me. Wow! I cannot even say how inspired I am. I'm about 20 lbs heavier than what you were when you first started, so to see you at my goal weight only 10 months out is mind boggling. You're doing amazing!

(deactivated member)
on 8/6/11 3:54 pm
The truth is that there is something about seeing someone go through rapid weight loss that kind of mentally makes it seem like they're losing too much when they're really not.

There will always be people who will tell you, you're too thin.  It is extremely rude. I have just come to accept the fact that many people were unfortunately born with inferior forms of intellect.
zcadden
on 8/6/11 4:14 pm - New Orleans, LA
You (and your brain) WILL equilibrate after a year or so....then you can giggle your ass off everytime you look in the mirror or step on the scale.    I LOVE my DS!  You will grow into it.  That is just their reaction to your quickchange...they will get over it.  Trust me.  Enjoy your new body, girl.

D U S T I N  

 
SW/BMI: 303#/50.4    CW/BMI: 162#/26.9 

Start your Journey @ DSFacts.com

 

P. Poster
on 8/6/11 9:36 pm
 I just spent a week at the beach with my entire extended family.  I was told over and over that there is NO WAY I can or should lose any more weight.  That my "bones are sticking out".  That I am too thin, I need to eat a cheeseburger, blah blah blah.  I am almost 6' tall, weigh about 150-155, and wear a size 8.  Hardly a bag of bones.  I still have rolls, and plenty of fat on my body.  I think I could still lose another 10-20lbs and be OK.  Everyone else insists I would look emaciated....  Whatever!  I still see myself as FAT.  I am about 14 months postop, and my brain has definitely NOT caught up yet.  Not even close...

Anyways, I'm rambling, but I just wanted you to know you aren't alone in any of this, and yes, it sucks!
Generic User_Name
on 8/6/11 10:26 pm
 My mother tells me that all the time!!!  She doesn't mean to do it.  I think she still sees the old me and hasn't gotten used to the new me.

It will come though.  Hang in there and don't let them get you down.


Michelle B.
on 8/6/11 10:31 pm, edited 8/6/11 10:32 pm - Cleveland, OH
 Man..this is already starting for me and I still have 30-35 lbs to lose.  I was just complaining about this.  I have someone at work that keeps saying "now, you gotta stop some people just look better with a little meat on them."  ugh!
AllieInOntario
on 8/6/11 11:16 pm, edited 8/6/11 11:16 pm

People don't like change, ... and I do agree with Lynn, I think sometimes jealousy is the motivator. And others, just need something to say, just to hear the sound of their own damn voices.

Our bodies are changing. It takes a while (from what folks have said here) for the body to catch up at certain points of the journey. Looking a little "gaunt" goes away. Hair grows back. Boobies... well... not so much :)

Just smile and might want to try saying: I'm doing JUST fine thanks... anyone got any bacon? :)

Pick your surgery first, then your surgeon. Not the other way around.  
PS:... Potato chips should be a food group.

I'm tired of screwing with that damn health widget.
 I've lost 125 pounds to date!!!!
   And I'm UNDER 190 now!!! 
 
             
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