When did you stop seeing yourself as fat???

Ask me again in another 6 years.

Thea...funny, well maybe not so funny, but odd? you asked this question. I'm nearly 4 years post op, and I had a "shopping" thing happen Sat. I've bot my underwear at Penningtons' forever. I'm now in an X, I figure because of my tummy I need these...I wouldn't have a clue on what else to buy inanother store to be honest. So, not really needing any new undies, I still went in...30% off anything in the store, customer appreciation....I did the tour...especially the sale racks...and I decided, on the way out of the front door without any bags, that everything finally looked to big for me....and I was saying it out loud!! Have I hit the fact that maybe I'm not fat anymore??? I still really don't know. I think if everyone was honest...I would believe that we all go thro this...Patti K.

Patti, I had a very similar situation on Pennington's on Saturday as well.  It was their grand opening after remodelling, and since I was in Reitmans right next door, I popped in - thought I might find a summer dress in a size 14!  I did a quick tour of the new store, realized that it was finally "over" and walked out empty-handed!  Perhaps it took buying and wearing regular-sized clothes for a while to make me realize that I was no longer their target customer.  It all takes time, but the head and the eyes eventually realign.

Megan...so glad I'm not the only one!!  makes ya happy eh??
Patti K.

I can really relate to what you are saying.  Looking in the mirror I still feel the same way but when I look at pictures of myself before and after I see what everyone else sees. 
The  weight is gone but it takes the mind a little while to catch up.  Way to go on your weight loss!!

I'm lucky I guess, but at 14 months post surgery and down 205 lbs - I'm now not the fat lady in my head anymore.  I think, in part, it may be because I have a very distant 40 year old memory  of the person I look like now - in other words myself in my 20's. 

My 23 year old daughter, who has known me ONLY as 250 lbs - 350lbs, said last week that she actually didn't recognise me in an old picture we were looking at.  Strangely enough at first this was a little disturbing, and made me feel like I'd disappeared!  Then I chose to look at it differently.  I'd like to think that she was saying that I am inhabiting this new "me" with enough confidence and happiness that, what I am now - the "littler" me, has become the new norm.  

I'm OK with this because I knew going into this procedure that physically there was no going back.  By focusing on accepting the physical adjustments and recognising the permanent consequences of the surgery(no more big meals, no more special indulgences when I "needed" them, no more NSAIDS, etc.) I was perhaps also preparing myself to accept the second "head" part more easily.  I knew things were going to be different.

Claire

I've pretty much lost 100 pounds, I wear size 12-14 on the bottom, and pretty much any size up to a 1X on the top (depending on the style/cut of the item).  That's damn good considering I was 24/26 and 3x or more.  But its taken this amount of weight to be able to say "wow, you're looking pretty good."  We've lived a long time as one person, and now we've become another, and it's tough to recognize the two as the same person.  Even in pictures I had a hard time.

Forget naked - for me that's never going to be perfect.  Perhaps another 30-40 pounds and some surgery will help, but I've never been perfect and I never expect to be.  Only my husband and I see me naked, and so long as he's okay, I'm okay (for the most part)  I try to focus more on how much younger I feel, and how energetic I have become, and how different things have become between us.  My husband recently told me how nice it is to see me happy again.  These things are so much more important to me than looks.

Will I ever be totally comfortable in my own skin?  Perhaps not totally, but I hope to get pretty darn close, and for me, that's a good goal.  You're definitely not alone - I think we all go through this.

Yes, I can totally relate but finally admitted to myself that as a 230 lb woman I **was* still fat. Maybe not as fat as before, but still....I've still got a long way to go but I'd say at around 210 lbs/size tight 16 is when I began to notice a significant change in my overall silhouette from very overweight to getting there.

And try hard not to feel shame. No matter your size you (we) still had/have intrinsic value. /hugs

Btw...way to go on the 75 lbs lost!

Thanks, everyone, for the candid responses. It seems that I'm not alone in these body image issues. I guess I thought losing weight would make me love my body more. As it turns out, I have LOTS of brain work to do. Just one more little bit of proof that the surgery fixes your stomach but not your brain.

At 240-ish pounds I'm definitely still obese. I was just hoping that I wouldn't always see myself as such. DRAT!! Looks like my mind will see me like that for a long time to come.

I'm 1yr post op, down 110 pds and I still have days where I think i'm the old me at 275 pds.
For some reason I get insulted when some of my friends make skinny jokes towards, like i find it offensive that they refer to me as skinny.

When I first started my journey, I was worried about how I would view myself after because I've always been the big girl. That was my self image, my personality.  I'm still dealing with getting my brain to recognize that my body has changed and to get some of those negative thoughts out of my head.  It's a journey, but we'll all get there :) 


Amy