I am Broken: An Editted Cross Post from Local Support Group

*warning this post is fraught with self pity it is meant as a vent and not to scare pre-ops or solicit responses, support, sympathy or pity. . .it is purely an expression of frustration*<br />
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I have spent the majority of my day dissolving into tears and weeping inconsolable as the nurses charged with my care wonder in and out of my room not one acknowledging that I am emotionally broken I am tired of feeling sick and in constant pain. I am frustrated at not being heard.<br />
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My doctor sits on the foot of my bed and says there is nothing to do to make me better. . .if there was even a 20% chance of improving my situation with surgery he would take that risk. . .how do I tell you I don't believe you. . .I have been told by the surgeon you referred me to, what needs to be done. Do you not understand that your failure to present a plan of action complete with time lines, however, flexible they need be are breaking my spirit. Do you not realize that your failure to even try and help me get my life back reads to my family and friends ad clinical incompetence. I know your skill I know your stats I am a health care professional I chose you to care for.I know you are Leary of making my situation worse, you have guided me through life threatening complications but I telling you I willing to take that risk at your hands in hopes that I may recover my former life as a contributing member of society.<br />
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I am frustrated by the level of nursing care I am not receiving. I have received stellar care from more nurses than the mere custodial care I have received from those who nurse in name only. Unfortunately those who nurse in name only negatively effect my emotional well being. I realize I have a very high standard of practice, a level guided by patient advocacy and the recognition that patients need to feel they have a modicum of control. What does it matter my scheduled steroid is delayed 20 minutes while you administer a prn order of gravol except that you have to walk back up the hall and get it. Why do you think it is appropriate for a patient to wait over an hour for pain medication. How dare you sigh in such a way as to indicate that I am being demanding when I refuse to allow you to check my blood sugar or draw my blood until you hang that pain medication or gravol I have been begging (yes begging) for. How dare you suggest my tears are a manipulative ploy for sympathy and attention.<br />
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I need to know that you know that the patient in 515-2 is Leona Dove and that she is broken emotionally, that she is tired of fighting for what should be given, that she is frustrated by your failure to act, your failure to acknowledge, your failure to even indicate that you even care.<br />
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SEE ME, FEEL ME, HEAR ME AND PLEASE AT LEAST TRY TO HEAL ME<br />
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I AM WILLING TO TAKE THE RISK OF PLACING MY LIFE IN YOUR HANDS WHY DO YOU NOT CARE ENOUGH TO TAKE THE FAITH I HAVE IN YOU AND TRY

(((Hugs)))

 

oh Leona ... I am praying they do something. And I have informed a few nurses that their care was substandard. They need to hear it... So tell them or the patient advocate at the hospital you are in. 

Chris

I am one of them and I have. There are three nurse I have requested not care for me there are two who have requested not be assigned my care because I am too demanding and I frustrate them

I am sorry for your pain. I don't know the whole situation, but, I feel bad that you are going through what sounds like a horrendous time.

My thoughts are with you and I am hoping things will get better soon for you.

previous post date with background story posted below maybe someone can post the link can't do it on my phone

I cry for you dear Leona....

My God how you suffer undeservingly.

Can you send this post to Hagen?

I wish I could. . .I hear rumours that MIS has "drones" here on OH perhaps this will get back to him

This post getting back to him may not be ideal.  The medical staff may not have a lot of empathy if they hear you have been venting on a chat site. I'd give this letter to someone -maybe  the nurse looking after you, the head nurse, your primary Dr., patient advocacy?

I'm sorry you are going through this.

Do you not think I have tried these avenues. . .seriously?!?



I am a health care professional who has been lobbying and advocating for myself since January and for others several times throughout my 27 year career. . .



I openly say this is a vent& and wha better place to vent than a chay site. .
so maybe I just roll over and cry silently to myself. . .if as a nurse I came across a post like this I would review the care I was giving was mindful of the requests being made. II guess that is the difference between me and a less than Stellar nurse who would take offenset;br />


FYI formal letters have been sent to Humber, MIS, Bariatric Referral Network, MOHLTC, Premiere of Ontario (twice because of the change in leadership), Minister of Health, Official Opposition Critique to the Minister of Health and the Ontario Ombudsman. . .



I am sorry if this is harsh but your comment, while you are perfectly within your right insults and infuriates and frustrates me