how do you think of food? spin-off

Right now I'm trying hard to stick with my plan.  I have deviated some (drank milk to boost protein, ate a cracker & sf pudding and I've gone over calories a few times).  I see food as an enemy almost.  I HAVE to eat certain things and can't eat other things.  I'm not really upset about the things I can't have like sugar.  I do get upset about not being able to have fruit or the veggies I want.  I don't know if this makes sense or not, but I've got some resentment built up because of the things I see as healthy that I can't have.  The things I'm really looking forward to having are stuff like squash and salad.  I want something crunchy sooo bad, that's where the cracker came from.  When I'm released to other veggies, I'm going to try kale chips.....

I end up not only with the resentment but I feel guilty for the resentment and guilty for those slips to following my plan.  I want to do this RIGHT, damnit. 

Then I come on here and read about all the things that others can eat that are not on MY plan.  And I get even more resentful especially when the people eating those things are losing much faster than I am.  I can't separate this from just wanting to eat what I want to eat regardless of what it does for me, kwim?  I don't want to get on the slippery slope of justifying eating the way I want to.  My plan is strict but ...

So the idea that sugar is bad is only part of it.  Right now all food is my enemy.  I hate even thinking about it.  And I have no idea how to work through this. 

So my question is, how did you guys find peace with food?  If you've changed the way you eat from what your surgeon told you, why? 

I know this is rather confused.  Sorry for that and thanks for reading all this.   

I was just feeling the same way, but you put it into words much better than I. This is exactly how I feel! I love the fact that I am losing, not as fast as others... but losing.

I will tell you how I made peace with food. My eating was based on emotion.  I would not be surprised if you have the same reason behind your eating. Having said that, I found this book to be instrumental in changing my relationship with food. Everyone who I have loaned this book to has ended up just as affected. Not surprisingly, my psychiatrist has a copy on her bookshelf too !!

The Emotional First + Aid Kit: A Practical Guide to Life After Bariatric Surgery, Second Edition
Cynthia L. Alexander (Author)

I sincerely hope you are able to obtain a copy of this book and read it.  I read it from time to time to help keep me on track.

Thanks!  I looked it up last time you posted it.  Gonna have to get it. 

I found out yesterday that despite being laid off I get to keep my awesome insurance until November.  I sense a counselor in my future .... 

Well at least you know I give consistent advice  :)

Yeah dont be afraid to go see a therapist. I was so close to going to one when I somehow managed to pull myself together and get back on track.  Hate to flog a dead horse, but reading the book a third time helped me a lot too.

First, this just goes to show how different food plans are: I had surgery 2 days before you and I've been on "regular" food for 3 weeks.  I am allowed steamed veggies and I've had lettuce, and fruit.

Second, I don't know...I just don't think about food that much anymore.  That's not exactly true.  I think of how to get my protein in with the fewest calories.  But, other than that, I don't fantasize about foods I can't have (sugar).  I have thought about it, and I just don't have the desire to eat cookies, cake, candy...I don't even know why.  Now, carby stuff, I have to avoid, because, even though I don't sit around dreaming of them, if I get started, it's hard to stop.  I was at a friends and had a handful of cheese puffs (I know, NOT a good choice)...and I had to literally walk away and turn it off, because I would have eaten them until I was sick.  This is the only run-in with a poor-choice food since surgery.  That's not to say I haven't had higher calorie days than others, it's just to say it's the first time I could have eaten mindlessly and paid for it later.

So, basically, I just eat on a schedule.  I don't think much about it, I just do it.

My surgeons plan is very liberal, once you get past 6 weeks. The first 6 weeks is kind of brutal. But, he expects 5 -6 small meals a day, no mote than 15 grams of carbs at each mini meal, and on the rare occasion, you just have to have chips, make sure the are scheduled into your carb intake.

Once you are in the 6 - 8 week space, I think tweaking for what works for your body and your life is ok. Not everyone can do 3 meals with no snacks. Other plans are ok. But always remember we are different, and your milage may vary.

Your early out and I think your feelings are normal. It's all emotional and the sooner you let go the better.

Food is now nothing but fuel for my life and workouts. No emotion to it , just a neccesity for life.

If I'm hungry I eat and if I'm not I don't.

I used to miss certain things but then I focus on how unhappy and unhealthy I was when I ate them.

I would rather focus on living and being happy and healthy rather than focus on food.

I'm not bashing people on this board, but I don't read a lot on here or post a lot because foods we can and can't have is the most of the focus and I just don't have that interest anymore.

This is where I want to be I just don't know how to get there.  Thanks!

Takes time. Keep a mental picture of how you looked and felt at your biggest burned in your mind. Food is just not worth that.