Need to vent
Hello everyone,
It has been a long time since I have been on here and I have missed. Soooo busy. And I need you guys, your support and words of wisdom.
My mom had RNY on Halloween last year. She was 64 at the time. The surgery went well but post-op has been a nightmare. At Christmastime she was still only able to eat one or two bites and then she would normally throw up what she had eaten. In January I went with her to the surgeon and I told them that I thought she had a stricture because of all the puking--liquids and foods. They blew my off like I did not know anything. (I am an RN and had RNY myself)
In June she was admitted to the hospital because they thought she was having a stroke. No stroke but electrolytes were all off, some critical. She was admitted and I got *****y and made them do an EGD. What did they find? A stricture. Also a bad ulcer and they cannot fix the stricture until the ulcer is healed. She had to switch surgeons due to insurance and the new guy is not concerned at all. She has lost 140 lbs and is so weak that she cannot walk across the house without stopping. She is afraid to leave the house because of weakness. She falls often and sometimes cannot get back up without help. She has taught my eight-year-old to call 911 if they are alone and she goes down. Her diet is, literally, three to four bites of food per day. I suggested that she go back to pureed and really soft texture. But I am only the daughter, what do I know.
I am frustrated and angry at everyone. I know that a lot of you have had strictures and have dealt with lots of issues. Why won't the doctors listen? Why are they letting her suffer and basically letting her starve to death. I would not treat a patient this way. It's wrong! But what can I do?
Thank you for listening/reading.
It has been a long time since I have been on here and I have missed. Soooo busy. And I need you guys, your support and words of wisdom.
My mom had RNY on Halloween last year. She was 64 at the time. The surgery went well but post-op has been a nightmare. At Christmastime she was still only able to eat one or two bites and then she would normally throw up what she had eaten. In January I went with her to the surgeon and I told them that I thought she had a stricture because of all the puking--liquids and foods. They blew my off like I did not know anything. (I am an RN and had RNY myself)
In June she was admitted to the hospital because they thought she was having a stroke. No stroke but electrolytes were all off, some critical. She was admitted and I got *****y and made them do an EGD. What did they find? A stricture. Also a bad ulcer and they cannot fix the stricture until the ulcer is healed. She had to switch surgeons due to insurance and the new guy is not concerned at all. She has lost 140 lbs and is so weak that she cannot walk across the house without stopping. She is afraid to leave the house because of weakness. She falls often and sometimes cannot get back up without help. She has taught my eight-year-old to call 911 if they are alone and she goes down. Her diet is, literally, three to four bites of food per day. I suggested that she go back to pureed and really soft texture. But I am only the daughter, what do I know.
I am frustrated and angry at everyone. I know that a lot of you have had strictures and have dealt with lots of issues. Why won't the doctors listen? Why are they letting her suffer and basically letting her starve to death. I would not treat a patient this way. It's wrong! But what can I do?
Thank you for listening/reading.
Have you told her doctor all of this? If so, and he is still not listening, perhaps you should ask him how he is going to justify allowing a woman to continue being able to eat so little (and doing nothing) if she dies of starvation.
Lora
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
I'm sorry she's having such a hard time. Since she's an adult, there's really not much you can do, other than make suggestions. She can take them or leave them.
If I were in her shoes, I would change surgeons if mine did not seem to care and I would have insisted on an EGD or other tests back in January. Well, I did that, when I was having constant nausea and suspected I had gall stones and my surgeon blew me off. I insisted on an ultrasound, which did indeed find stones, and then I found a new doc as soon as he had removed my gall bladder because I wanted a doc that cared if I was nauseous day and night.
If your mom is able to keep down liquids, she should be doing protein shakes right now for protein and calories. But you can't make her do that if she doesn't want to. If she cannot keep protein shakes down and they cannot treat the stricture right now, they could put her on TPN. She can change doctors if she needs to in order to find one that will take care of her.
If I were in her shoes, I would change surgeons if mine did not seem to care and I would have insisted on an EGD or other tests back in January. Well, I did that, when I was having constant nausea and suspected I had gall stones and my surgeon blew me off. I insisted on an ultrasound, which did indeed find stones, and then I found a new doc as soon as he had removed my gall bladder because I wanted a doc that cared if I was nauseous day and night.
If your mom is able to keep down liquids, she should be doing protein shakes right now for protein and calories. But you can't make her do that if she doesn't want to. If she cannot keep protein shakes down and they cannot treat the stricture right now, they could put her on TPN. She can change doctors if she needs to in order to find one that will take care of her.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
I am so sorry for all you and your mom are going through. I haven't had surgery yet so don't have much info to offer there. About all you can do is to annoy the heck out of the doctors until they listen and do something to help her. If need be find a way to get a second opinion from another doctor. Your mom is lucky to have you looking out for her! I will be praying for both of you.
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