Weigh****chers and no support. PLEASE help

Melanie M.
on 2/18/13 9:06 pm - Amherst, OH

Let me first start off by saying that I have posted only a handful of times and tomorrow I will be 6 years post-op.  Some of the responses I received being this far out with simple questions posed an opportunity for some to really bash me and were hurtful.  I am really going through a tough time as far as my WLS journey is concerned and I am looking for answers and support.  I know my rules and what I should and should not be doing, and I am asking please for support here, not another bash session.  :(

Tomorrow I will be 6 years post-op RNY gastric bypass.  I lost a total of 200 pounds and was 160 pounds at my lowest.  We planned on a child, had her and she is now almost 4.  In those years I have regained and am disappointed in myself for letting it get to this point.  I am now 200 pounds.  It makes me sick to my stomach to feel like I am losing control like this.  And as much as I know I just need to get back on track (and have needed to for almost 4 years), it's incredibly hard.  I need help.  My biggest fear too is feeling like I need to "diet" or do something special to get back where I need to be, but lately I have been researching WW and it seems as though this may just be a push starter to help me gain control of my habits again.  Wondering if anyone else this far out has tried anything like that?  I don't wanna ruin something that has changed my life and I feel like I am on my way.  PLEASE, any words of encouragement would help.  Thanks so much.

- Melanie


"Thanking God everyday for my second chance at life.."
poet_kelly
on 2/18/13 9:19 pm - OH

Certainly you can try weigh****chers.  Do you go to a WLS support group? That might help, too.

View more of my photos at ObesityHelp.com          Kelly

Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor.  Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me.  If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her.    Check out my blog.

 

Melanie M.
on 2/18/13 9:45 pm - Amherst, OH

Kelly,

I used to be good about going to my support groups when I was months out from surgery and then even once I was almost 2 years, but once I got pregnant and had my daughter, our focus all went to her and I stopped sticking to everything it seemed that I was doing to take care of myself.  I was dedicated (and still am believe me!).  Exercise became an enjoyable part of my everyday life, my eating habits were wonderful and I don't wanna place all of the blame on just getting pregnant, simply saying that I slowly gave in to a lot more and it's harder to put all of my entire  focus on me again since having her.  I'm just scared I am slipping back into old habits.  And I've become so depressed over it that when I do consider things like going to my support groups, visiting my nutritionist, I get discouraged and just don't because I am embarassed that i have gained and it just seems hopeless.  :(  I feel desperate even thinking about trying anything like WW because it used to just be my new habits that eating rght and working out did so much for me.  I just don't know where to turn. 

- Melanie


"Thanking God everyday for my second chance at life.."
poet_kelly
on 2/18/13 9:52 pm - OH

I can understand feeling embarrassed and discouraged, but regain is not that unusual.  You're not the only person to have that happen.  You recognize you need some assistance and support.  You've reached out here.  Now you need to reach out to other sources of support, like a registered dietician and a WLS support group.  It may not feel comfortable, but that's OK.  You can do hard things.

It's definitely not hopeless.

View more of my photos at ObesityHelp.com          Kelly

Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor.  Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me.  If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her.    Check out my blog.

 

Kim S.
on 2/19/13 4:10 am - Helena, AL

You've done what almost every mother does....we often take a backseat when the kids come!  First, you've got to realize you are not the first person to gain weight after weight loss surgery! Seriously, we will have to fight obesity the rest of our lives, and no one will be 100% successful 100% of the time.

You've got to stop wallowing in self pity.  Keep doing the same thing and expecting different results = what?  INSANITY.  You can do hard things, and you can do things that make you uncomfortable.  If maintaining weight loss was easy, everybody would do it!  It is hard, and it only gets harder.  But guess what?  It can be done! 

At this point in your journey, the answer is very simple.  You've got to CONSISTENTLY burn more than you consume to create a weight loss.  How is that done?  Track everything you put into your mouth and exercise.  Simple right?  Yes, but not easy. You will have to make time for yourself.

You should reach out to every avenue you have for help.  Why feel embarrassed?  Like I said, you didn't invent regain....they've all seen it before, and I'll bet they know of many folks that have beat it...but you've got to ask for help first. Weigh****chers is a good eating plan, and if you go to the meetings, you'll get great support.  Why not give it a try?

You've invested a lot of time, energy and money into getting healthy.  Why not make that a priority again?  You are going to be a much better person and mommy in a healthy, fit body.  Each day you spend wallowing in self pity, you'll never get back again.  Make every second count...and be sure some of them are dedicated to just you. 

             
     
madeformore
on 2/18/13 9:40 pm - MN
RNY on 06/21/12

Setting up some appts with your WLS dietician might be helpful as well. I find seeing mine more often that "required" helps with the accountability that I need.

Good luck!

Amy

HW: 270   SW: 245   CW: 172  GW: 160 then we'll see  

    

    

LucysJourney
on 2/18/13 9:56 pm - VA
RNY on 01/14/13

Hey Melanie....pick one thing at a time to change...you know there are lots of things you need to do different to lose the weight...just pick one and start with that...try it for a while and see if you can build momentum...and then add to what you are doing...if you try this you may just find yourself back on track before you know it.

The hardest thing is taking the first step...take a small one...you won't regret it...

~~ Lucy

Melanie M.
on 2/18/13 10:00 pm - Amherst, OH

Thank you everyone for your kind words.  I am ready to get myself back on track, I am just lost on where to begin and even coming back to my blog here and posting again is making me feel like I am moving in the right direction. 

- Melanie


"Thanking God everyday for my second chance at life.."
Cheryl N.
on 2/18/13 10:05 pm - Des Moines, WA

I do not advocate WW because they don't push protein.  They say you can eat anything you want and lose weight as long as you are within points range.  Most people tend to waste points on junk and processed food rather than lean protein, veggies, etc.  Just my opinion and experience.

246 in Dec 2008 before banded 1/28/09 at 215 lbs, band crapped 9/09 at 170 lbs and struggled with it and regained to 203 revised to bypass on 8/1/11 and am very happy.

 

    
Kellysnewlife
on 2/18/13 10:14 pm - LA
RNY on 08/15/12

WW has recently revised their program to focus on fresh fruits and veggies as well as lean protein.  They have placed a higher points value on higher carb and fat content items.  Also they have started a healthy habit a month portion to their program.  My mom goes and January focused on a fruit or veggie with every meal or snack.

 

 

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