Body image, TMI

When I was obese I was self conscience while being intimate with my husband. He didn't care, he loved me regardless. But my breast where breasts and I had an ass. Now my breasts are deflated, I have no ass and the skin just hangs at my stomach. I am more self conscience now then when I was obese. My husband still says he doesn't care, but I care. Plastics is a long time out for me, if ever.
How do I get pass this?? I am having a hard time being intimate with my husband because I don't like the way I look.

Oh, sweetie, I so feel your pain on this one. I know most guys are attracted to thin, fit bodies, and some guys are attracted to large, soft bodies, but no one is attracted to this sad, saggy mess I have become. It was especially hard for me at about your stage when my face was gaunt, my hair was thin and scraggly, and my breasts were just small flaps of skin. I will never be able to afford plastics so I was devastated. Things did settle and fill out a bit more for me - I'm far from perfect, but I feel much better now at four years out.

Hang in there, and know that you are blessed to have such a loving, supportive husband. Just think of this - if roles were flipped, and he had physical imperfections, would you still be attracted to him and enjoy intimacy? Sexual attraction has more to do with chemistry and feelings than how much a person resembles a model/movie star.

If you really are having a hard time getting past this, it may help to get some counseling - it certainly couldn't hurt. Just know that you are not alone, and beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder.

Unfortunately I have no advice for you. I feel and look the same way. You shou.d be thankful that you have such an amazing, supportive husband that you can grow to be comfortable around. Looking like this is much harder when you're single in the dating scene!

I totally understand this. I feel I look great in clothes but would scare anyone that saw me naked. I would hate to see the look of revulsion in their eyes. In your case your husband has reassured you his love for you is still strong. He loves you not just your body. I would have to say you need to believe him and trust what he says is the truth and don't hold back. Perhaps find some sexy shape wear that is  intimacy friendly to help you feel better about yourself while being intimate.

One piece fishnet crotchless body stockings, they come in all colors and some with lace etc.  Visit a female friendly porn shoppe or online and you will see these marvels of modern engineering that can hold back the folds of skin and drooping bits and still make us look pretty damn hot even when we are not.  It's not a huge investment but it changes your body image of yourself and sexy starts in your head, when you feel it, your husband will appreciate how much the extra hotness makes you feel. 

I think these are what Heidi had in mind:  (at this price it won't matter if he rips them off either )

http://www.lingeriediva.com/bodystockings

Yup and you can even find ones with sleeves if you are so inclined, plus size etc.  You want it to fit nice and snug though to hold that stuff in.  It really is amazing how they look on, you would never guess what lies beneith.

Sin Kim, don't I look awesome in those ads????  

That's a cool idea Heidi. Thanks for posting this. I have to say I am a saggy mess now too. I wear shape wear every day because it makes me feel better and look better. I didn't know about these though! Thanks again.