what a great "problem" to have !

anniechanging
on 9/23/13 4:16 am

I honestly cannot believe that I am in this place...  There are simply no words to articulate how thrilled and truly grateful I am for this surgery.  I thought that everyone else would have incrediblly successful weight loss surgery stories, but  not me.

I had my surgery last November, and not only reached my first weight goal, but have reached, and surpassed, four lower, revised weight goals.  And the weight loss seems to continue, albeit slowly. 

HW: 230, SW: 228, Original goal: 150, revised goal:138, revised goal: 128, revised goal:125, revised goal 120,  CW = 116  (I'm 5'3" so I'm within a healthy BMI range.)

I'm certainly eating more than months ago.  I mostly eat very healthy, and focus on the protein, and try to follow all of the RNY rules.  But unfortunately, I'm indulging in some of the "bad" foods that caused my obesity, including the occasional cookies, muffins, ice cream, etc.  This causes me huge guilt.  I'm continuing to lose weight, albeit slowly.  I presume that the villi in my intestines have not yet regenerated, and so some caloric malabsorbtion continues.

My concern is this... for each new and lower weight I reach, I think that I cannot possibly bear to gain weight, even though I'm below my various goals.  I'm thrilled and so thankful to have made it to this point.  The idea that I could have been happy and content at 150 is now preposterous to me.  Likely 138 or even 125.  I'm certainly not in an anorexic mindset (I simply would never have the discipline and control it takes to have an eating disorder, and I'm not wishing for that).  But I am paranoid about gaining any weight from where I am now, and yet I think it will be inevitable.  I've bought lots of new clothing in crazy/tiny sizes, and I don't want to grow out of them.  That would feel like failure.  But, surely this low weight is not sustainable (I think I last weighed 116 when I was in grade 5, for God's sakes!), once my body is fully healed and my body resumes it's normal absorbtion. 

I keep telling myself that there will have to be some "rebound" weight gain, but I really don't think I can deal with that reality.  And for those of you who may be wondering, no, I have not been exercising.  That is a huge problem, and I MUST get into a regular exercise routine now, before it's too late.

I'd be very interested in hearing about your stories, if you got below your weight goals, and then experienced a re-gain, and how you dealt with that - emotionally and mentally.  Or if you're below your goal, and maintaining it, what are your strategies and how do you stay on track with food and exercise? Thanks and take care.

Cicerogirl, The PhD
Version

on 9/23/13 4:24 am - OH

I think you might benefit from seeing a counselor.  You might or might not maintain your current weight, but I am less concerned about your weight than I am your comments about how horrible you think it would be to bounce up a couple of pounds and how that would make you a failure.  Although you say you do not have an "anorexic mindset", feeling the way you do has a distinct possibility of leading to it.

 

Lora

14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained

You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.

cajungirl
on 9/23/13 5:15 am, edited 9/23/13 5:15 am

I did get below my goal (130 lbs, 5'1, normal BMI) before 1 year post-op and stopped losing.  Between year 2-3, I had a gain of 10 lbs that put me 7 above goal.  I was laid off, found a new job, sold a house, bought a new one and just was really flying by the seat of my pants.  That woke me up and I was able to get below 130 lbs again fairly easily.  I've stayed below since.

Can you maintain, not sure?  Possible probably but will it be work, yes indeed it will require work.  Maintenance is more difficult than losing, that's for sure.

Congrats on doing so well in a short period of time.

Edit:  Have you talked to anyone about your fears? 

Proximal RNY Lap - 02/21/05

 9 years committed ~  100% EWL and Maintaining

www.dazzlinglashesandbeyond.com

 

MyLady Heidi
on 9/23/13 6:40 am

I broke all my goals and am now at my all time lowest and I was scared for years of regain.  Finally I realized I was totally in control and even when I do gain a few pounds I have been very dilligent to get them back off.  Currently weigh 127 @5'5, my ultimate goal was 138 and I have stayed at or around it for many many years.  I just dropped this low due to stress, but I am doing my best to keep my stress gift loss if I can, so far so good.

Congrats and enjoy!

scoobyluvr1
on 9/23/13 8:22 am
RNY on 10/21/13
Congratulations on your success. Im a pre op newbie so cant really relate to your concerns about regain but i think i would naturally worry about it too once i reached my goal. I wish you much success with your maintenance

    

~Ronda~  

Can you hear me now? Only on R&R 3.0 PM me for an invite!

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