Really Need HELP

MyLady Heidi
on 7/22/14 12:16 pm

Monday is always reset day.  I never **** off during the week, only on the weekends, when Monday comes its back to business, its worked for 9+ years.

tdbull
on 7/22/14 12:28 pm - WA
RNY on 08/13/13
This may work for me. I'll have to give it a try.

Lapband surgery in 2009 -  Revision to RNY August 13, 2013 with gallbladder removal.

HW - (260)   SW - (197)   GW - (135), updated on 1-2-14 to 125lbs  HT 5'5"  Goal reached 3/2/14-revised goal to 120 on 3/9/14   reached 4/6/14             

    

Louise1974
on 7/22/14 8:53 pm

I am in maintenance too and it is really tough.  I have struggled just like you.  I am still figuring it out but here is what has worked for me:

Be gentle, shaming yourself, being unkind and hateful to yourself just makes you want to eat more.  I have started writing a letter to myself when I am in that "never again" space but it isn't a "you are an idiot don't do this" kind of letter.  It is more like a "I know this is really hard but this feeling is just awful, what were you really needing?"  kind of letter.  A therapist can be really helpful too, but be careful about who you choose.  you want someone who understands eating disorders.  My husband and kids eat all sorts of stuff but they are pretty willing to work with me.  if a food is way too big a trigger they are very supportive and agree to just eat it when out at restaurants or whatever.  Or we will keep just small portions of it in the house.  I like Poet Kelly's idea about putting people's names on things.  I know that if my kids are looking forward to that cupcake they saved i am way less likely to eat it.  I also need really really tasty food, like all the time, at every meal!  that helps me immensely.  I think the questions of whether to eat certain foods or abstain from them forever is a really personal one and there are lots of factors involved.  For me, I seem to do better when I include certain foods in my diet, like carbs...  But I work to figure out a way to do that that protects me from binging.  For example, I know that eating "trigger" foods like bread, cookies...  when I am upset will ALWAYS lead to a binge.  So that is something I work hard to not do.  But when I am in a good place, having a small portion of something seems to protect me from binging later.  Some folks do much better with total abstinence.  It takes some work to figure out what you need. 

This is clearly the hardest part of the journey so far for me.  And I struggle greatly just like you.  Hang in there and just keep showing up. 

tdbull
on 7/22/14 11:22 pm - WA
RNY on 08/13/13
Thx Louise. I'm not ever giving up. Appreciate your tips. Every day is a struggle but I can and will do this.

Lapband surgery in 2009 -  Revision to RNY August 13, 2013 with gallbladder removal.

HW - (260)   SW - (197)   GW - (135), updated on 1-2-14 to 125lbs  HT 5'5"  Goal reached 3/2/14-revised goal to 120 on 3/9/14   reached 4/6/14             

    

Patm
on 7/22/14 11:58 pm - Ontario, Canada
RNY on 01/20/12

I found CBT very helpful. I did this with a psychologist. Made me look at my triggers and why I was sabotaging myself.

  

 

 

 

tdbull
on 7/23/14 3:46 am - WA
RNY on 08/13/13
I've been reading about CBT and think that this is what I need also.

Lapband surgery in 2009 -  Revision to RNY August 13, 2013 with gallbladder removal.

HW - (260)   SW - (197)   GW - (135), updated on 1-2-14 to 125lbs  HT 5'5"  Goal reached 3/2/14-revised goal to 120 on 3/9/14   reached 4/6/14             

    

Dodgergirl27
on 7/23/14 1:36 am
RNY on 01/22/14

Hey TD, I'm not in maintenance yet, but I do have an aunt who is and her advise to me is that every Monday, make sure your protein is over 100 and carbs are under 50.  Also, make sure that your carbs only come from veggies.  She says she doesn't even eat the veggies on Monday, she literally eats lean protein and shakes (and occassionally some string cheese) and that's it.  She says this really helps with her carb cravings through out the week.  Hope that helps!

      

    
tdbull
on 7/23/14 4:04 am - WA
RNY on 08/13/13
Thanks - I do feel so much better when I reduce my carbs

Lapband surgery in 2009 -  Revision to RNY August 13, 2013 with gallbladder removal.

HW - (260)   SW - (197)   GW - (135), updated on 1-2-14 to 125lbs  HT 5'5"  Goal reached 3/2/14-revised goal to 120 on 3/9/14   reached 4/6/14             

    

(deactivated member)
on 7/23/14 2:01 am

I am sorry that you are struggling.I would talk to your husband about the snacks in the house and how it affects you.I make my kids buy their own junk food.I won't buy it. I feel like I am buying cigarettes when I buy garbage food.

I also have my kids hide anything that might trigger me into an eating frenzy.I know it sounds silly but if it works I will do what ever I can. 

 

 

tdbull
on 7/23/14 3:47 am - WA
RNY on 08/13/13
He's been very supportive, but he just doesn't get that when the food is around it triggers my cravings. I did put most of his snacks in a bin up in pantry and I rarely go there. It's jus the ice cream and chips out in plain site.

Lapband surgery in 2009 -  Revision to RNY August 13, 2013 with gallbladder removal.

HW - (260)   SW - (197)   GW - (135), updated on 1-2-14 to 125lbs  HT 5'5"  Goal reached 3/2/14-revised goal to 120 on 3/9/14   reached 4/6/14             

    

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