Does nervousness = not surgery ready

I'm hitting the panic button...hard.

I am scheduled for roux-en-Y gastric bypass surgery on August 28th. I have no pre-op diet but have managed to lose 20lbs on my own.  I have done my research. I have stalked these boards as well as another forum. I know about vitamins and water and walking and portion size. I know the complications and I know the successes. 

All of this being said, I am so nervous! I constantly wonder if I am making the right decision. I am the healthiest fat girl ever. I have perfect blood work. My cholesterol and blood pressure are great, as is my A1C. (I know everyone says it is a matter of time until I develop problems.) 

I hate knowing that even if I follow my plan perfectly there is still a chance for complications. I don't worry about dumping, it's something I kind of hope I do have to help me. I worry about my life taking this drastic turn and what if I absolutely hate the new me? I'm just scared of the unknown. I have been working on losing weight and changing my habits for 6 months now. It seems that now that I am so close I am slipping back into bad habits.

Does feeling this way mean that I am just not ready for surgery? I don't feel that's the case but I don't want to fail.

Being nervous is normal, and a healthy response in my opinion! You are quite literally making a life altering decision, one that should not be taken lightly. What fears are you having? Are you nervous for the surgery itself? Or is it because you have questions?

I'm sure you've done like most of us did pre-op and researched the heck out of everything RNY. But if you have more questions, by all means take to the message boards here, ask your surgeon, and go to support group (yes you can go as a pre-op).

We all had nerves about surgery, it can be quite scary, but hang in there. Deep down i'm sure you know if you truly want this surgery or not. Think about that and go from there :)

I was so excited when I got my surgery date.I was so focused on losing the weight and when it got closer I was crapping my pants with worry. I also felt so much shame for getting to this point.

I made a list of pros and cons and the pros totally beat the cons. I had it RNY in October and I am down over 100 pounds and I have never felt better in my life. I can walk for hours where before I couldn't. I was a big liar before.I would lie and say I didn't feel good to leave places.

I am not really sure you are ready or not ready.That is something that you and your doctor and maybe a therapist. I am 47 and I have gone through every diet in my life and I was so lucky to have been able to have this surgery. I would lose the weight and gain it back after every diet. I know this is just a tool I am using but I will say It was the best thing that could have happened to help me.

Also, I had incredibly good labs prior to surgery, but I knew that I was lucky and that luck would soon run out. Surgery has been one of the best things I have ever done. Not easy at all, but so worth the hard work. And even though my labs were good before, they are AMAZING now. :)

I honestly think it is not knowing the outcome that is scaring the crap out of me. I have said from the beginning, this surgery's benefits far outweigh the risks for me. I still believe that to be true. I just hate not knowing if I am going to be in the small percent that have ridiculously terrible extra skin or that I might need iron transfusions for life or any of the other off the wall things that MAY happen after the surgery. 

Argh - I'm just nervous that I am making a decision that I will regret later on...

Like you, I had zero health complications before surgery.  Even at over 350 lbs, my only "issues" were knee pain.  My blood work was good, no diabetes, no cholesterol etc.

Since surgery in December, I am down over 160 lbs.  I have loose skin.  It's not cute.  But the feeling of waking up at 200 lbs and literally bouncing with energy, and working out, and being fit, and sitting comfortably on an airplane, or sitting in any booth anywhere, and not having a full "food coma" feeling FAR outweighs the saggy skin, at least for me.  

I totally get the fear of the unknown.  You may in fact have loose skin.  You may need iron infusions.  I don't know your starting weight but I can assure you that future health problems are a definite, not a "may" if you are morbidly obese.  From knee surgeries to a heart attack to diabetes...I knew I was not going to live a long and active life at my old weight.  So that clinched my decision.

I hope you find peace with your choice and good luck!  We are here to support you whatever you decide.  For the record I also had very little pain, no real recovery time needed, and no complications.  This was the BEST choice I ever made :)  

Good luck!

Hi! I am just over 5mo out of RNY and I think what you are feeling is totally normal. Elective surgery is tricky because I don't think it is human nature to "elect" to have your organs re-routed haha. You are making a very positive decision to better your long term health. Like you and many others, I had 0 co-morbidities prior to surgery. I started my journey at 305lb and for all intensive purposes, I was the picture of health. All of my labs and test work were perfect, my organs working perfectly and I was an active person who never really missed out on much (so I thought, I am WAY MORE ACTIVE now).

Having this surgery is the greatest thing that I have done for myself in my lifetime so far. I am down 97lbs and am MORE active than ever, MORE energetic, and much much MORE healthy. I would do this surgery all over again 100x. At my hospital support group meeting last night (we meet every week) there was a pre op patient there and she looked scared and nervous so we started talking and she had the normal concerns that I think everyone has pre op… She was surprised when everyone chimed in saying how great they feel now and how they would do it again every time. 

As for complications etc, I will tell you what my surgeon told me. The complications that are possible after surgery are no where near as unhealthy and "deadly" as the complications that I faced if I didn't lose this weight. I have had a terrific journey so far, the only blip on the radar were kidney stones a few weeks out because I wasn't drinking enough water, I learned my lesson and now I drink water and feel great.  

Anyone who has had this surgery will tell you that it is work, this tool is here to help you for the rest of your life but you have to commit to changing your relationship with food and your body. We all worry about failing because for most of us, we have failed at every fad diet that we have tried or exercise plan… but this is not a fad diet or an exercise plan… you are changing how you absorb food, how much food you eat, what you eat and how you work out. It is phenomenal. 

In the end, you have to make the decision for yourself but if you are looking for advice, I cannot say enough wonderful things about this surgery and all that it has done for me so far. I am now living my life - happy and healthy. I love every second of it. 

-Ashley 

I found those last weeks before surgery to be the hardest part of my journey.  After surgery I felt great, the weight fell off effortlessly, I never developed any complications.  To be honest, the weight has also stayed off pretty effortlessly.  This was nothing like my years of dieting, because I am no longer hungry and when I eat, a small serving fills me up.

I would be worried about anyone who was not nervous. This is a big change but it is a beautiful one!!

I was very nervous but not once did I doubt my decision. Nowhere to go but up....er, down rather!

I too was a bundle of nerves prior to surgery. I think its pretty normal because it is a life changing decision with a bit of unknown thrown in too. I had my RNY August 29,2012 at a weight of 260 pounds though at one point I was 265. I had been obese my whole life,even as a child. I wasn't a healthy heavy girl; I had diabetes,high cholesterol and uncontrolled high blood pressure. I had knee and back pain every day and would wait on a bench when .I went places with my family because I couldn't keep up. I lost 140 pounds in about 9 months and have been at the same weight now for a year. This summer was the first time that I have been able to wear clothes from the year before and not have them tight on me. I had hardly any pain after surgery and didn't take anything stronger than Tylenol when I came home. Ba land knee painatre now gone as is the high blood sugar,cholesterol and blood pressure. I now walk 4 miles a day--for fun. This new lifestyle is hard work but the results are more than worth it!