Need Advice

I had my band placed in December 2008, after many ups and downs my surgeons office told me that they no longer do the band since they had so many problems with it, they immediately sent me for a barium swallow and said I had a problem with my esophagus.  So a complete unfill.  Long story short gained weight.  Back over 200!  So after much soul searching and talking with my diabetes doc, I decided that a revision to RNY was the way to go.  Now it seems as though I have to go through the whole process again.  I had a little bit of anger around that, and voiced that to the people in the surgery center,  Now it seems as though they really do not want to do surgery on me.  The therapist told me I was free to find another surgeon if I did not like the way things were going, and the RN told me that I could still work the band.  REALLY after they made such a production of telling me what damage it was doing to people and how risky it was to keep it.  Then she said maybe I should think about just staying the way I am.  What the H###.  Does anyone think I should look for another surgeon.  Or should I confront these people.  I feel persecuted for being angry about the band.

Unfortunately, if you "confront" the current surgeon it is likely only going to exacerbate the situation, and you probably don't want a surgeon working on you when (s)he doesn't want to be doing it.  You may or may not get appropriate after care if you "bully" the surgeon into the surgery.

I would first find out exactly WHY they don't want to do the revision on you.  Based only the very little info you provided here, there are two possibilities that come to mind: the therapist may have had some reservations or -- more likely -- they got pissed off when you vented about having to go through the process again and they labeled you as a "problem patient".  Bariatric surgeons aren't lacking for patients these days, so they can afford to choose not to deal with people that they think may cause them grief.  If it is the latter reason, they probably won't give you a specific reason for their reluctance to do the surgery or will cite something lame.

Then I would definitely seek out a second opinion because it sounds like perhaps you alienated the first surgeon and/or the staff, and If the are any complications with your RNY you really want a surgeon who is "on your side". 

Unfortunately, and somewhat ironically, you will definitely have to go through the whole process again with a new surgeon and the rain that you were going to have to do it with your current surgeon is most likely an insurance requirement,not the surgeon's requirement, especially since you are a revision.

Lora

If it were me, and I know it's not, here's what I would do:

1) talk to the surgeon and his staff and apologize for losing your temper.  I wouldn't even try to justify it (though you can - I get that).  Just apologize and tell them it's very important to you that they be the ones to continue your care and do your surgery. Ooooze grace and remorse.  Oftentimes that is enough to smooth over any situation, not just medical ones.

OR

2)get to another surgeon ASAP and tell them your side of the story. These guys/girls talk to each other.  You want anyone new to hear your assessment of the situation first. They *will* want to know why you want to change, whether you give them your side of the story or not they *will* call your current surgeon and ask what happens.  Even if you don't sign a data release or anything.  If it's verbal, they will tell you it falls under "continuation of care" or some such nonsense. So you're gonna want them to hear it from  you first, the good, the bad, and the temper-tossing.

I want to be clear here.  I don't blame you for being upset.  It's just that the easiest way around these things is to take all  of the responsibility-at least as far as they know-and get back in or stay in their good graces.  You know as well as anyone that these offices can make your whole experience as painless as possible or absolutely horrific.

Good luck to you.  You're in a tough spot.  If you get a chance please keep us posted.

This sounds like the "permanent record" conversations from high school!  Absolutely seek a different surgeon who wants to be in charge of your care. There are many out there. Calmly express (only if asked) that your relationship with your previous surgeon just "isn't a good fit". You will not be blackballed from the barriatric surgeons of the world. Last I checked, it is still a free country and you can choose the physicians you feel best meet your needs. 

It is very emotional and hard, this process. One time I did get emotional with my surgeon and he started to take a "take and or leave it" attitude with me, when I apologized and explained how stressed I was feeling, he backed down too. 

Reality is though, no matter who you go with you will have to go through the whole process again. Once you wrap your head around that, I think it will make it easier on all accounts. My surgeon had said if certain tests and pre-requisites were more than 3 months old they would have to be redone. They want current information.

Good Luck!

If you like your surgeon - I really think you should apologize. Blame stress... scared of a second procedure -- hormones; anything.

If you can't bring yourself to do that - you should go elsewhere. Trust me - I work in a doctor's office and the confrontational approach won't get you anywhere.

Sorry :(