Emotional

So the first real boyfriend I have had in years broke up with me this morning due to taking a position out of state. No matter how much I know it's not the case all I could think of is am I too fat.... I know I'm a normal healthy weight now but I can't seem to get the thought out of my head. I'm so glad that since surgery the food binge that would follow something like this would make me reall really sick. I just don't know why I still blame everything on my weight. I'm a hundred and twenty eight pounds and a size four for goodness sake. I guess they weren't kidding when they said they only fix our stomachs not our heads.

Angel

 I am sorry this happened to you. Just remember you deserve to be happy. Allow yourself to grieve and make sure you take care of yourself. Don't make yourself a hermit and not be around friends.

 It is hard to sometimes see ourselves as thin. Maybe a good therapist might be able to help you. Not everyone needs to go to therapy but sometimes it feels good to have someone say what you are feeling is normal.

Take care

Angel - so sorry!! That is really tough. I think it natural to fall into old thinking habits (thinking errors) but the good thing is that you know that thought of it being due to your weight is false. And you are aware that binging would have been an old coping mechanism and can't do that now. Give yourself time to mourn this loss, do some things to nurture yourself, be cautious that other negative coping mechanism don't rear their heads (ie: overspending, eating more carbs than protein as you are able, etc) I don't know when this happened but even in a week it will feel different - not better - but different. take care of yourself!

Thank you both for your supportive words. I guess I just needed to vent. Not so much about the break up but about my reaction to it. I'm trying so hard to be mindful of my emotions since I use to be a huge stress eater. On the bright side I always know my peeps here will listen when I am feeling weak and cheer me on when I am doing good. Thanks for the sweet replies it really helped to keep me from falling back into old patterns.

Angel