Bad choices

on 5/21/16 7:20 pm

I wish there was a nice way to tell someone they are eating too much and bad choices ? I see people eating things early post op that I wouldn't eat 13 years post op. Or do I just shut up? 


on 5/21/16 7:33 pm

If it's me, please tell me! You won't hurt my feelings. 

Consult Weight:276/Surgery Day Weight: 241.6 /Goal Weight: 150

H.A.L.A B.
on 5/21/16 7:41 pm

Just shut up. 

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

on 5/21/16 8:00 pm - MN
RNY on 11/26/12

Chances are s/he is still aware of WLS guidelines.  I consider a friendly hello and the words, "how are things going for you?" a considerate way to see if s/he wants to engage in or avoid discussion.  Engage usually means an invitation to listen; avoid usually means to shut up.

on 5/21/16 8:07 pm
RNY on 06/15/15

Depends on the context. If they ask you for help or advice, go for it. You can even ask them if they would like your advice. If they don't, it's not your place.

Referral: 8/14; Orientation TWH: 12/14; Nurse: 01/15; SW, Dietician, Psych: 2/15; Surgeon: 5/15; RNY: June 15/2015

on 5/22/16 3:16 am

Shut up. If they wanted your advice, they would ask for it.  Or at least, they would ask questions about how much and what you are eating in a surrepticious [sic] attempt to figure out why you are successful and they are not.

RNY Surgery: 12/31/2013; 

Current weight (2/27/2015) 139lbs, ~14% body fat

Three pounds below Goal!!! Yay !  

The Salty Hag
on 5/22/16 2:31 pm, edited 5/22/16 7:32 am
RNY on 05/20/13

I understand completely. If they ask you for help or your honest opinion, it's fine. Otherwise, like the others said...just zip it. 

It is frustrating to see ( or read about ) people eating what they shouldn't, but 9 times out of 10, they know it's not a good choice and food policing never works out well. 

I woke up in between a memory and a dream...

Tom Petty

on 5/22/16 3:04 pm

I think sometimes I have been the food police and you're right, it's none of my Damn business unless asked.






CerealKiller Kat71
on 5/22/16 3:27 pm
RNY on 12/31/13

IRL, I never say anything about someone's food or what they are eating -- unless specifically asked.  Even at real -life support meetings of WLS patients -- I never say anything about someone's food choices, unless we are talking about menus and food option issues and feedback is requested.

Here, however, if someone posts their food, then I say it.  If they don't want their post-WLS eating scrutinized, then they shouldn't post what they are eating.  

I guess I am a jerk.

I would rather be a jerk that tells it honestly, than a "nice" person who enables someone to waste their one opportunity. 

It's such a short honeymoon period.  So short.  

I'd rather someone tell me to F-off -- than risk not helping someone make the most of it.




"What you eat in private, you wear in public." --- Kat

on 5/22/16 5:59 pm, edited 5/22/16 11:18 am

I would shut up about it- If they ASK I would tell them to stay clear of blah blah- or if they say- I can't seem to lose- then you ask what they have been eating- then help them.

If I were just out in public and someone told me not to eat something I would probably punch them in the throat.


Just my two cents.

HW 305 SW 278 Surgery weight 225 GW 160 LW: 118.8

RNY 12/15/2015,

GB removal 09/2016,

Twisted bowel/hernia repair 08/2017

M1 Dec 2015-13.0, M2-7.0, M3-14.5, M4-9.4, M5-7.1, M6 9.8, M7-7.6 ,M8- 7.6, M-9 5.5, M10-6.4, M11- 2.2, M12 Dec 2016- 5.8

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