Theory about melted candle look and regain - opinions

Okay, so off the bat I've heard from so many people that once you get near goal you get a sickly melted candle look, almost too skinny people say. Most say your weight then redistributes and that look goes away. So I'd love to know how long that generally takes for your weight to settle. 6 months? A year? Would love that info!

Also, statistically, people get down to a low weight then put on maybe 10 or 15 pounds. What are the chances that people do this because they get down near goal, see the melted candle look, and decide to gain a little weight as opposed to waiting for the weight to redistribute and the sickly look to go away? Or is the slight bounce back due to something else in your opinion?

Thanks for any info and/or opinions!

Hope everyone has a great Friday

I think it probably took a solid 6 months at goal before things started to redistribute. I never looked melted, but very boney and gaunt.

I haven't put on the 10-15lbs, but in my case, I expect that I will allow myself a bit of gain because I'm pretty low on the BMI chart (19). I also anticipate that the gain will be by easing up on a militant diet and not 'intentional gain'.

For me, some of the melted candle look is that I lost so much weight after having stretched my skin out for more than 30 years. Exercise has helped some because I have developed more lean tissue under it, but only PS can fix some of mine.

As for regain, I am only 17 months post-RNY but have settled within a 3 pound range of my low weight. My surgeon and my PS don't want me to get any thinner and I am working hard at strength training to look more lean rather than skinny.

I'm 5 years out, and am at back at my original goal weight having lost a 20 lb regain.

I don't think the melting candle look is a given. I think people who are younger and/or have spent less time at a MO weight will be less likely to be "candley".

I did look like that. I still look that way. I didn't get plastics, and I'm sure that's a contributing factor. I was also SMO for well over 20 years and was 41 at the time of my surgery.

Looking gaunt after you hit goal or get near goal is pretty common, I think. That also happened to me, and the fat redistributed itself during year two.

My regain was caused purely by me mistakenly thinking "I got this." and got lax with my eating. I got ****y. I let crap carbs back in, and between years 2 and 4, I put on weight. It's taken me the better part of a year to lose that 20 lbs, and I feel so much better having lost it.

I think some people put a little bit back on purposely if they're truly too thin, but I think the vast majority just start playing fast and loose with their diet/eating.

for me- I did look like ET without clothes on. at my lowest I was 118 with a hernia and twisted bowel and couldn't eat solid food. I had the surgery and gained 5 pounds which turned into more of a gain (see below)... I admit now- a bit underweight when I consider i had extra skin also. my surgeon told me last dec he would rather see me at 140 pounds strong and healthy than 115 skin and bones.

From year 2- current (2 years 8 months) there were a variety of reasons for my gain, stress, overeating episodes up to 2 times a week,not exercising, not weighing my food, not logging my food, and starting weight training. And part of it I believe is part of the loss of absorption after the first 18 months. Also- trying to figure out exactly how many calories to eat to 1- lose weight, but not cause binge type episodes. very challenging. Losing regain is taking forever and I'm trying to be patient with myself.

My body does not look the way I want it to and skinny slim jeans no longer fit because my butt has now come back. Yet another change to wrap my head around.

I do know now I'm stronger now physically than I have ever been in my life though I did weigh a bit more than I would want to. work in progress like many others...

I did kind of have a melted candle situation. However, it isn't a big deal to me.

Regain: I regained 15 pounds with crappy eating. I have some stomach issues, and suddenly thought carbs were great. I have lost five of those pounds, but holy cow, it is slow going.

A few people have a hard time putting the brakes on loss, but most of us coast to a stop.

Ah, sweet bird of youth, with any luck your 24 years young skin may well help you in that area of concern.

As to melted candle look- sometimes labeling something in such a negative light tends to make it so in our minds. A sad judgement to stick onto the effects of WLS tha bring us so much health and satisfaction.

When I see melted candle on these boards, it is userally references made BY co-workers, family and so called friends in reaction to the changes in appearance of the poster. I'm relatively sure they would not so negatively criticize a person of the same make up and weight that has been that way all their lives.

I say Shenanigans to those Chip-downers. Will you look a little gaunt for a while?-will the weight redistribute? Maybe. What will be will be. Get yourself down to a healthy weight YOU are satisfied looking at in the mirror. I know "old" cant tell "young", young has to go through it --but, sweetie, You will never look lovelier than you do-today-right now-

That's such a sweet reply :) I appreciate it

I'll preface by saying-- I never made it to my personal goal, which was always higher than my recommended BMI. So when I got to my lowest I was not bothered by how I looked- or even felt I look sickly. Sure I heard it from others-- but I didn't feel that way.

I never had the melted candle look. Yes I have loose skin- but call me lucky for the genes I have, but it's not melted candle style. Nothings hangs, no apron etc. weight did redistribute in the sense my face doesn't looks as drawn as it did initially- I don't see much change otherwise. Four months at my lowest weight helped that drawn/sunken look dissipate.

i do believe my bounce back gain is 1/2 eating habits and 1/2 metabolic.

Thank you everyone for your replies! I really thought more people would have intentionally gained a little weight back to look less gaunt, especially if they hadn't heard about the possibility of weight redistribution. (As an aside, I am sorry if I offended anyone with my crass wording. I apologize, I should have used more appropriate terminology.)

Thanks again for all the information and I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend