Getting my surgery soon, I'm a little scared.

on 7/16/19 2:34 pm

Hello everyone,

I am a 39 year old mother of 2 and I have always struggled with my weight. I just got approved for surgery and I am a little scared. I have only had 2 c sections in the past and have never been "put under". Also, I am concerned with losing the weight too fast and having excess skin everywhere. A small part of me is worried about not waking up after surgery. I have so much anxiety about everything. I know this is something I have to do in order to live life longer and be healthy. Do any of you have advice for me? Things I should be aware of or do before surgery. Thank you

on 7/16/19 6:10 pm
RNY on 06/03/15

if you're significantly overweight, you're likely to have loose skin even if you lose it slowly. So I wouldn't use that as a factor in whether or not to have weight loss surgery. If you're going to have loose skin, you'll have it regardless of how you lose the weight. I want to add that a majority of people seem to have a phobia about loose skin. I did as a pre-op and early post-op as well. But I can tell you now - and so can a lot of others here - that the loose skin is a very small price to pay for this. I would take my loose skin any day over being super morbidly obese again. ANY DAY. Hands down! Plus, for many of us, it's not difficult to hide the skin in clothes. You (and your partner and doctor) will likely be the only ones who know it's there. And if it really bothers you, then there's always plastic surgery. And then again, yours may not even be that bad - sometimes it's not.

secondly, you WILL wake up after surgery. The morbidity rate on gastric bypass is 0.3%. That means you will have a 99.7% chance of pulling through just fine. The rate on the sleeve is even better. Those are some mighty good odds. These have become very safe, very routine surgeries. They are much safer than a hip or knee replacement, for example. I would not worry about that AT ALL.

on 7/16/19 6:38 pm
RNY on 07/23/14

First I have no regrets. It doesn't mean it hasn't been hard work, it has.

Was I afraid? Terrified. Terrified of dying on the table, terrified of the great unknown. I was also terrified of staying like I was.

My advice? Follow the rules, come back here do you can have daily support, join the menu thread.

Cynthia 5'11" RNY 7/23/2014

Goal reached 17 months. 220lb Weight Loss
Plastic Surgery Dr. Joseph Michaels - LBL and Hernia Repair 2/29/16, Arm Lift, BL, 5/2/16, Leg Lift 7/25/16

#lifeisanadventure #fightthegoodfight #noregrets



on 7/16/19 7:50 pm
VSG on 03/21/19

I was also very scared and anxious in the beginning. This is major surgery but like others have posted it's a highly successful surgery. I'm so happy that I did it and I'm sure you'll feel just the same once you're on the other side.

HW:212 CW:149 GW:125

Surgeon: Dr. Penner @ TWH

Citizen Kim
on 7/17/19 5:58 am - Castle Rock, CO

No such thing as losing too quickly.

Work that surgery like it's your job and lose your excess weight as quickly as you can! There is no time easier than the first few months after surgery.

It pains me to see people making excuses for not doing what they should out of the gate.

I lost ALL my excess weight, and an extra 20lbs in just under 5 months and had minimal skin issues (at 41 years old). Quick loss doesn't trump genetics or how long you have been morbidly obese - they're the reasons for excess skin issues

Proud Feminist, Atheist, LGBT friend, and Democratic Socialist

on 7/17/19 7:10 am - DC
RNY on 12/16/13

I have to echo what the others have said - if you use your tool and put in the hard work, you can reclaim an amazing quality of work and be much more active with your kids, and around a lot longer too! I think that the risks of living as a morbidly obese person FAR outweigh the tiny risk of having surgery. I think I initially felt nervous and then I felt calm. I had decided that I was sick and tired of being fat. I was tired of waking up with my knees hurting. I was tired of being scared of not fitting into a booth/airplane seat/the world. I was tired of walking in a room and feeling so conspicuous because I was the largest person. And RNY has allowed me to lose the weight I wanted, by eating high protein and low carb for an entire year, until I went from 351 lbs (day of surgery, 36 year old woman at the time, 5'4") to 160. Is it easy? Nope, everyday now in maintenance is hard and I am fighting the regain fight. But am I still miles healthier than I was at 351 lbs? 10000%! I wish I had done it earlier. Join the daily "what are you eating" thread on the RNY board. Your friends and family don't need to obsess about calories, dense protein, what foods are easy to get down early on, etc...but everyone here will gladly join you! It's a great place to get support and make friends and be among a community who gets what you are going through.

Did I have excess skin after all the weight loss? Oh yes. It wasn't that noticeable with clothes on, but I was definitely saggy in the nude. I opted for plastic surgery but that was a personal choice. I would choose to look like a wrinkly bag of skin over continuing to put a strain on my heart and body of lugging around 150 lbs of extra weight - in a heartbeat!!!

Good luck and follow your plan! You can be successful!

on 7/17/19 10:46 am
RNY on 04/25/18

It is ok to be frightened, but don't fret about it. Before you know it, you will be on the other side and all will be behind you. I had RNY and has no problems at all. I too wish I had done it sooner. I no longer have to treat for diabetes or hypertension and while I still have 30 lbs to go, I have 114 off and feel much better. I want to get to my ideal doctor's table weight for my age, build, etc. In 8 lbs, I will be to the weight I was when I got married. I never thought I would see that day again. Good luck with your journey. Take photos, measurements and be good to yourself. Work with the surgeon and your nutritionist. It will be fine.

on 7/17/19 12:19 pm - MA
RNY on 08/01/14

I could have written this myself almost 5 years ago! I'm 38, have 2 kids both c-sections and i suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. I can completely relate with how you are feeling. I am so glad i had this surgery. Is everything perfect? No- You are going to have excess skin with a significant amount of weight loss no matter how you lose it. Your fears regarding anesthesia for surgery are normal for anyone to have. I am able to play and run with my children - something i never would have never been able to do at 300 lbs. This was my biggest motivating factor because i was a pretty healthy obese person (sugars, blood pressure, heart all fine) My biggest complaints before were joint/leg/back pain. DO your research, make sure you know what your getting into. You can have many complications after surgery but just be realistic with regards to the actual probability of them happening. Taking care of yourself afterwards with follow up visits and regularly getting blood levels checked will be super important to keep you feeling well.

My#1 recommendation: Get into therapy now if you are not already. There is an underlying issue to why we eat the way we do. If you don't deal with these issues you will likely seek other substances as a coping mechanism when food is no longer an option. I became an alcoholic, i never thought it could happen to me. I never had a problem until after the surgery. Its called transfer addiction and its a very real thing. I have met so many people in my recovery journey that have experienced this.

I'm not saying that to scare you and maybe your surgeon has already addressed this with you but I was never warned and I wish I had been. Maybe things would have been different. This is the only negative consequence i experienced. Albeit, a huge one!

Lisa (38) my goal is 160 lbs.... my dream is happy and healthy

on 7/17/19 2:26 pm

Thanks everyone for the support. As I read your posts it made me feel much better, it is nice to know I am not alone. I can do this and I will succeed. Life is going to be so much better, for myself, my kids, and my husband. We went to a local amusement park today. I won't even try to ride any of the rides, due to fear of not being able to fit. The whole time all I thought was next year I am riding everything, I will have no reason to sit on the side and watch. I will be able to experience things I haven't been able to in a very long time. The hard work is so worth it, and I deserve it.

on 7/18/19 3:35 am


Respect your fellings.

Is very important the mental health for surgery and the life posop.

Take your surgery in your time.