What's on your Wednesday Menu?

on 10/21/20 8:50 am - Central Coast, CA
RNY on 06/26/17

I honestly don't know. We haven't seen them since March. We live about 1.5 hours away from each other. Our big get togethers are for thanksgiving giving and Xmas. We are god parents to their children and vice versa. Now that you mention it I saw pics of them going to the beach when all the beaches were closed and joking that it was their private beach. I guess it never occurred to me that maybe in my circle there are people who don't believe in masks.
Oh well, as long as I didn't come across rude I'm good. Sometimes I over analyze what I wrote because worried the tone might not come across correctly.

SW:261 6/26/17 GW:150 10/6/18


on 10/21/20 9:14 am - DC
RNY on 12/16/13

Oh I don't think you were rude AT ALL. I think it's very kind of you to say "our kids may bring COVID back on a plane and we love you and don't want to expose you".

Sometimes when I am up to my eyeballs in work and stress, my texts can seem curt. Hopefully that's just the issue!

on 10/21/20 1:00 pm - Central Coast, CA
RNY on 06/26/17

Good point!

SW:261 6/26/17 GW:150 10/6/18


on 10/21/20 12:19 pm
RNY on 07/20/15

We spent 2 hours in a meeting this morning, revisiting our "Team Norms" during remote work, because without the face to face a lot of people seem to be reading tone in emails and chats that are completely unintended. Our new rule is that when we feel something is off in written communication, to pick up the phone and make an effort to talk.

I'm probably guilty of accidentally making my assistant feel badly. I am usually in GO mode by 6am and I will send her a g-chat with a "where is so & so?" without so much as a good morning, because I am just on and not thinking about her feelings but she is young and I am her boss and I need to be more thoughtful. I'm actively trying to get better.

Anyway my point being--she might have just been in the middle of something and hit an automatic reply on her watch just to respond, but not realize what it sounded like to be the receiver. I'd give them a call soon to see what's up instead of festering feelings that might not be real.

  • High Weight before LapBand: 200 (2008)
  • High Weight before RNY: 160 (2015)
  • Lowest post-op weight: 110 (2016)
  • Maintenance Weight: 120 (2017-2019)
  • Battling Regain Weight: 135 (current)

on 10/21/20 1:03 pm - Central Coast, CA
RNY on 06/26/17

Haha! I guess I am such a big F (ESFJ) that I'm always worried about people's feeling. As long as I didn't offend anybody I'm OK with the curt response. My worry was that maybe what I said was offensive and maybe I jumped the gun before they even mentioned the thanksgiving gathering at their home.

SW:261 6/26/17 GW:150 10/6/18


on 10/21/20 7:19 pm
RNY on 08/11/14

I agree, I don't think you were rude at all. Maybe give it a few days and give a call or another text just to "touch base"? Just to prevent the next exchange feeling awkward to you.

RNY 8/11/14 with Dr. Kelvin Higa PS Lipectomy 4/12/17 with Dr. John Burnett HW 291.4/CW 135-140 (03/2020)GW 150

White Dove
on 10/21/20 8:26 am

You did not do anything wrong. You politely explained what you were doing and why. And you are making a very wise decision. The two word reply from that person was rude. It is up to them now to reach out and make it right if they want to do that.

I believe a lot of our friendships and traditions will change after the stress of 2020. I am just taking things day by day and hoping for the best.

Real life begins where your comfort zone ends

on 10/21/20 8:51 am - Central Coast, CA
RNY on 06/26/17

That is so true but also so sad.

SW:261 6/26/17 GW:150 10/6/18


on 10/21/20 12:58 pm - Pittsburgh , PA
RNY on 12/19/17

Lost in translation. I bet they were not intentionally brushing you off. Text don't always have the same effect. I think my boss hates me most days by the way his emails sound but today is my 24 year anniversary so he can't hate me to bad. Take it with a grain of salt. I think you were very sweet for being so concerned with everyone's health.

HW 299 SW 290 CW 139 GW 140 2/08/2019 OPERATION: Surgical Hernia with excision of total surface area of 55 x 29 cm of abdominal skin.

on 10/21/20 9:22 am
RNY on 02/28/17

QOTD: I like to make handmade and baked gifts, but my family family are very picky, have different food requirements, and I'd have to pay alot to ship everything.

Occasionally I give something like a poinsettia or a fruit or other goodie basket. I guess the latter could be shipped or ordered from somewhere in their neighborhood, but that's $$ and a hassle.

A couple of years the adults drew names and the kids got gifts from everyone.

We've also done donations to a charity chosen by one family member. The problem is that their choices are places that I don't believe in their work, so I've donated to a charity that I like.

This year I'm just giving a gift card for each family. And if I can get them electronically, all the better.

HW: 248+, SW (RNY: 2/28/17): 244, GW (10/17): 125; LW: 115; 45# regain (19-20); CW: 135.6; new goal: 135; Plastics: Ext mastopexy, Ext abdominoplasty-5/18/2018; diagnosed w/ gastroparesis 11/20.

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