hey Lora
as anyone who has been the fat friend, as we all have been there....I know what this feeling is like. The thing I have to remember is now that I'm the small friend is some circles, I am the one that made the choice to leave the fax friend in me behind. If others have a problem that I'm no longer the fat one in the group and they are now, that's something they have to deal with. I don't feel bad for one second not being in the position any more.
Yes there are group that I am around where I'm right in the middle size wise and other's that I'm still on the big side. Our brains have such a hard time catching up with out weight loss. This too takes time and as a dear friend once told me, this too shall pass......
I don't think things are nearly as bad as you think they are. The stinkin thinkin as Yvonne puts it is such a downer, and I know I do it myself.....try to start replacing those stinkin thinkin thoughts with something more supportive like look where i came from and where i am now.
weight doesn't make you a bad person or a failure, it's just a place and like anything else that can be changed........don't like where you are, get in your car and move, that's what I say! we can move together, to greener pastures......to "healthier" bodies, take care of yourself and keep going to councelling, talking can really help!!!
take care

hi there
I just wanted to add here, that although I currently have a drug plan that I can very thankful for, there was a time when I was working for a company as a contract worker and with being a contract worker comes no benefits at all. In this situation I was crying in my Dr's office and told him the situation that I could no longer pay for my meds that I needed........effexor xr.....and he told me it was all ok. He gave me months and months worth of samples of effexor xr, as well as my birth control pill. He told me he would rather give me any samples that I needed then to see me sick and  possibley do something silly. I said I could always come there for meds when ever I needed them and for a couple years I had no choice. I didn't have the $300 to cover the script cost.
One thing that I would tell you to do, is to just get what you need. or can afford rather. If all you can afford is a weeks worth at one time, tell the pharmasist and just get a weeks worth.  You are not required to take a set amount at any one time. make it easier on yourself. do what you can with that you have.
talk to your Dr and if all else fails speak to the pharmasist to tell them about your situation. I am sure either one will be happy to help you.
Let me know how this works out for you!!!
take care Jackie