How Do We Approach People Who Are In The Same Condition We Once Were

svelteNgorgeous
on 8/20/11 12:03 pm, edited 8/20/11 12:06 pm
.... without being presumptuous?

I come in contact with people on a regular basis that are in the same unhealthy condition that I was in just a few short months ago.

I want desperately to share with others in need the life-changing solution that I've found. I just  have this feeling of how dare I make a presumption about another person's life.

Thoughts?

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(deactivated member)
on 8/20/11 12:10 pm
Unless the subject of weight, health, etc comes up.. I wouldn't be able to broach it myself. As a MO person, we all know there's the WLS option (we may not know details) and having it brought up out of nowhere would make even the toughest of us have a moment of irk, or embarrassment... but, if there were a way to get it into a conversation naturally, I wouldn't hesitate.
svelteNgorgeous
on 8/20/11 12:24 pm, edited 8/20/11 12:27 pm
I am in complete agreement with you...for the most part. I know for me, I have a PCP who advocated for WLS for 4 years before I heeded his advice. My wife and I have had a great relaionship with him for 20 years and still I was ambiivalent  about WLS. I wonder if others who may not have the great relationship with their PCP that I do are even aware of this treatment. Some may not even have a PCP at all!

I just think that the consequences of MO are so dire that I feel a moral obligation to share what I know. Just don't know how to do so tactfully.

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(deactivated member)
on 8/20/11 1:53 pm, edited 8/20/11 2:25 pm
I understand, and your doctor saying something to you is very different than having a stranger advocate to you out of the blue.. I guess in short, it's in the approach. As a MO person, unless I was friends with someone (or if the person was a paid medical advisor), it would have mortified me/possibly made me angry,  to have someone approach me without me asking. Remember, unless we are ready to take this step, we won't. It's a very personal journey and you may likely to do more emotional harm than good. 

Edited to add: If you really want to do good and spread the word about this surgery, just be an open book when someone asks you how you did it.. 
Bulldog80
on 8/20/11 12:27 pm - Macon, GA
Here's my thoughts!!!!

You can only share of your experiences!!!!  Avoid suggesting they consider the surgery.  Only say you are so glad you made your choice and how it has improved your life.  They may pull away from you at first and be judgmental that "you took the easy way out."  It was my doctor who suggested the surgery to me.  It was a cold slap!!!  He asked me if I have money saved for retirement.  Of course I replied yes.  Then he said, "well you might as well use it to pay for the surgery otherwise you will not be around to enjoy retirement."  It was cold, but effective.  He told me this February of 2010.  I had to research it., find people who have experienced success, and read the heck out of this forum!!!!  I had surgery June 15 this year.  Since then I've been off all meds for blood pressure and diabetes.  I feel 10 years younger and have so much more stamina!!!  I also enjoy seeing the small clothes!!!!

I totally understand your wanting to share your successful story.  I find myself seeing others who could also benefit.  I know I can't make that choice for them, but you can plant a "seed" to consider.  Start by encouraging them to take good care of themselves and get good medical attention because you care for them!!!  It just might work!!!!!

    
HW:250  SW: 218  CW:199.8   GW:150
Surgery date 6/15/11
svelteNgorgeous
on 8/20/11 12:36 pm
Thank you for your thoughts on this. Your input is helpful. We need to tell our story about how this has helped us. Many of the people I encounter are complete strangers so its a little challenging to to strike up a conversation that leads to the benefits of  WLS.

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Bulldog80
on 8/20/11 1:01 pm - Macon, GA
Don't most people say" Hello, How are you?"  There's your in!! 
Say "I'm great!  I've lost ____ lbs due to WLS and life is terrific!  I'm so proud of my surgery and how it has helped me!!!  Then tell your story!  If they run, at least you got them moving some and burning a few calories.  Your attitude and energy will be what entices them to stay and listen.  Use your svetleness!!!! 
    
HW:250  SW: 218  CW:199.8   GW:150
Surgery date 6/15/11
(deactivated member)
on 8/20/11 12:31 pm
I really don't believe that nowadays there is anyone who doesn't know about weight loss surgery. If you mean you think they don't know about VSG in particular, maybe that's true, but if they are open to WLS at all they will start their research and find out about it.

I wouldn't presume to say anything unless someone asks me. Can you imagine how you would feel years ago if someone just came up out of the blue and started talking about weight loss surgery to you? (I mean other than your doctor). I know I would be embarrassed and upset.
(deactivated member)
on 8/20/11 1:56 pm
Exactly.
The_Chungs
on 8/20/11 12:34 pm
I agree with Jo, if health/weight loss comes up in conversation, then I'd work it in somehow.

However, in full disclosure, I brushed off having surgery for a decade (I had two cousins that had successful RNYs years ago) and it wasn't until someone brought it up to me last May that I seriously looked into it. That person happened to be naturally thin and a stranger at a baby shower.  Had she not had the courage and tact to mention it, I'd probably be sitting on my couch right now sharing a large pepperoni and pineapple pizza, chicken Parmesan sub, and a cheesecake with my husband while watching tv.  No joke.

One of these days I'll get around to typing my story up on my blog, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." -  Confucius  
Height:  5'10  HW:  400  SW:  374.6  GW:  160    
  
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