After the Honeymoon phase is over... TIPS!

Hey all!
I has been a long time since I have posted on here and I hope that you all are doing well.

I just passed the 6 month surgiversarry point. My weight loss was slow to begin with and now it is even slower...

I am looking for tips on how to keep focused and how to stay on track to lose the rest of the weight to get to my goal.

My surgeon set a goal for me to lose about 35-40 more lbs and my goal is 53 more.

Any help would be appreciated because I my appetite is coming back and I am trying to learn how to deal with stressfull situations in life with other methods besides self sabotage!

HELP!

THANKS

HI,

I made goal at 18 months out, and remember how things slowed down at some point in the process and how frustrating it was at times.

For me, the trick was to look at maintaining the behavioural changes I made as the goal, rather than judging my success by the numbers on the scale. It took a LONG time to lose the last 20 pounds, but I continued to eat well, to move my body, to get in my protein and fluids ,,, and little by little it came off.

In terms of dealing with increased appetite - when I am on plan (90% of the time) the rule is that I can have anything IF I have at least 2 ounces of solid protein first. This pretty much limits how much of anything else I can and want to eat. If I am feeling "snacky" I first have a non-caloric beverage -  at least 16 ounces of Crystal Light or whatever. If still hungry after that, I have the protein and then if I am STILL hungry, I have whatever I want- although I do really limit any white carbs. I also continue to shoot for a minimum of 100 grams of protein a day and I am convinced that this has helped me maintain muscle tone and maximize fat loss instead of loss of lean body mass.

Frisco and Jimbo have both recommended that we NOT eat until stuffed, but instead measure our food and eat until satisfied, but not to capacity. I agree that learning to be happy with "enough" instead of trying to cram in those last couple bites, makes a difference for me.

Finally, I have taken pictures and measurements throughout the process and these have been very motivating when the scale is being uncooperative and I am in the midst of a long stall (towards the end of the losing phase, this was more often the case than not). I also keep track of non-weight goals - things I can do and experience that were not possible at a higher weight (walking long distances, amusement parks, hiking, canoing, wearing more stylish clothing etc...) and health goals (healthy choloesterol, blood sugar, blood pressure, body fat percentage etc...)

Good luck - hang in there, keep on plan, and you will likely meet your goal!

Great practical tips Margo... I'm copying your email to help me as I continue (since I'm only five weeks out now).
I'm glad this post was made because the responses are so useful to all of us. This is a voyage of life, not just some new diet or other fad... always we have to keep our eyes on what we can achieve when we stay on program.
Thanks all for these helpful ideas.
Lynn

 
It's now a fight...... !!!!

It's all you....work hard...work smart !!!!!

Gotta tighten everything up.......

This is where the committed people do well and the slackers fall off......

No more gimmies till you get to goal.....

I made it sound hard...and it is.... but completely doable.

I lost 100 the first 6 months and 70+ the second 6 months.

frisco

I never lost my hunger.

I have measured my food since I started on mushies.  I am 2 years and some months out and *still* measure my food before I serve it to myself.

Since I still get hungry, I eat on a schedule, and I pack my tomorrow food the night before, this removes the need for me to make decisions about "what" because that's done for me, I just grab the next container.  I can manipulate my hunger by the choices I make. Dense protein alone, I stay full for longer, about 3 hours, protein PLUS anything, I get hungry quicker.

I track my food - I honed amazing food amnestic skills and this is just a part of how I stay accountable. I do not think its "obsessive" just like I do not think balancing the checkbook is obsessive.  I know that I have paid the mortagage, and the utilities and can buy some socks without blowing my budget, so to speak.

My focus wAS JUST GET MY ASS to goal.  Food is going to be there.  Not everybody GETS to where they want to be for goal, but we all have to figure out what the hell to do with ourselves so we do not just regain.  Food is going to be there, its not "no not ever" its just "no not now."

Focusing on my behavior, instead of on my weight loss gave me something I could control.  Your weight is going to do what its going to do, but if your behavior is geared towards loss, then your outcome will be also. 

Do not get freaky, do not try and restrict like crazy, just clean up any sloppy edges and go back what helped you lose best that was in your program.  Trying to restrict for some folks (like me) is essentially just looking for an excuse to binge. 

http://books.google.com/books?id=Nl2bfrlGW4AC&lpg=PR1&ots=Fr kuEEWBTi&dq=%22thin%20commandments%22&pg=PR4#v=onepage&q&f=f alse

That book helped me set up strategies for myself and helped me see how I thought in terms of self defeating thoughts.

Shrink Yourself was another great book that helped me unpeel my emotional onion, and I go through it and the 10 Thin commandments once a month *still*.  For those of us with habits of self-sabotage and self destruction, we have to learn to think a new way.  Its simple.  Its not easy. Its WORTH IT!

Good luck girlie!  You can do this thing.  YOu have been doing it!! 

Thanks to Margo, Frisco & Brnadilynn for answering Kelli's post. It is a question we all for answers about. You vets rock. This is why I keep coming back. Sandra

How do you know how much to measure at different stages???

Thanks for a great question Kelli!

Thanks all for great responses.   I'm just past 6 months, have another hundred, maybe more, to go, and expect to have to work a little harder at this in the near future.  Really good to have the basics in front of me again. 

Appreciate the good help.

I was a slow loser too. I stopped losing weight easily once I hit 215lb, and had to work my butt off to get to where I am now (157). There were 2-3 month stretches when I lost nothing at all. I could easily re-gain it all, I know that in my heart.

Don't reward yourself with food. Don't think 'If I accomplish (xyz) I can have that slice of cake." Reward yourself with other things. Manicures. A song from iTunes. Some glittery nailpolish. A trashy romance novel (my fave!).

Learn to derive pleasure from other things on a regular basis. Practice it. Things like aromatherapy, a hot bath, laying down on a set of silk sheets, walking through a flower garden, listening to your favorite CD, calling a friend. In times when you're stressed or sad, you'll want a way to cope, and you'll turn to whatever self comfort is most familiar. So make yourself familiar with non-food strategies. Before you need to use them for real.

I'm not saying, don't enjoy food. But enjoy it in the proper context. It's keeping you alive. Eat to live, don't live to eat, as the saying goes.

Take responsibility for everything you put in your mouth at all times. Give yourself a zero-tolerance policy for excuses. Your cat got hit by a car, your husband ran off with the secretary, your kid flunked out of kindergarten, yes that's very unfortunate. But it does not give you an excuse to eat a tub of ice cream. Your body does not care that your life is imploding. I challenge you to try telling your thighs that they're not allowed to get fat off of this tub of fried chicken because it doesn't count, you lost your job. Nope. Not only will you find yourself jobless, you'll find yourself jobless with a closet full of clothes that are too tight.

That honestly was huge for me. I was always making excuses. "I went to the gym today so I'm allowed to have a half serving of ice cream." "My boyfriend cheated on me so this chocolate fudge cake doesn't count." (I ate the whole cake and couldn't put my jeans in the dryer for 2 weeks).

Similarly, no excuses when it comes to exercise. My most common excuse was "Oh I only have time to work out for 25 mins, it's not even worth it." Yes, it is. Get off your butt and do it. Every calorie counts. Train yourself to cut off your internal monologue as soon as you find yourself making an excuse. As I said, your body does. not. care. about what crazy justifications you're cooking up in your head. You could treat it almost like a seperate entity, a wild animal that you're in charge of caring for. You can't reason or bargain with a tiger. Guess what, you also can't reason or bargain with a liver, a pancreas, or a fat @ss.

Some of the other tactics I employ are a little controversial because they could be construed as eating-disordered. If I really want cake, yes I'll get a slice of cake. I'll take 2 bites, and immediately put the rest down the garbage disposal (no good if it's going into a relatively clean trashcan. I won't shame myself further by completing that thought). Sometimes I take a bite of something and chew it really well, then spit it out. That's mostly when I've already eaten my fill but really want one more taste of something. It's not ideal, but it works for me.

Learn to deal with societal pressures. You will go out with friends, they will try to get you to eat, drink, and be merry. Just be wary of those first 2. People in our society are raised to use food and drink as social tools, they're an integral part of how we bond and interact. They might think they're simply helping you have a good time when they pressure you into easing up on your food restrictions. Just try it, I made the chocolate ganache myself. One drink won't hurt you. Live a little! Have a script in your head for these times, know what you're going to say beforehand. It looks delicious, but I'm already really digging this fabulous tomato caprese salad! I'm not drinking tonight, I volunteered to be designated driver but I'll let you treat me to a diet coke. Most people aren't really trying to sabotage you, they want you to enjoy yourself, and since they enjoy food, they also want you to enjoy it. Some people though, will pressure you to eat junk so that they feel less bad about the fact that they are eating junk. Whatever the reason, try not to hold it against people. Just have a good time and stick to your guns.

Buy pretty clothes. Buy nice underwear. Spend a little time on your make-up. When I'm dressed well I feel better about myself, I carry myself differently, I feel prettier. And people pick up on that, they treat me better, and then I feel happier, and I need food less. I like looking good, and it's extra motivation to look even better. I thought I hated fashion in general. No, I hated wearing fat clothes. I hated myself. I dressed sloppily. People could tell with a glance that I didn't care about myself. Now I do. The difference is startling. It doesn't matter whether you're at goal or halfway there or one day out from surgery. Start acting like you care, even if you don't yet. Because one day it will sink in and you'll find that all of that pretending suddenly became reality. And you like what you see.

There is no reason to be critical of yourself or unhappy if you haven't reached your goal. It's tempting to think "I won't be satisfied until I'm wearing a size 8." Well, if you work hard, one day you will. But that won't happen miraculously in one day. As long as you're working towards it, there is no reason to be unhappy in the present. You'll still end up where you want to be. You can be happy now, and not compromise your final result. The amount we suffer is entirely in our control. Few people realize it.

OK, I'm going to get off my soapbox. I spend a lot of time thinking about the psychological and societal factors that have contributed to my weight issues, and it's more rewarding for me to figure out *why* I feel like I need a candy bar than it is to just use my willpower not to eat one. I should probably start a blog so I won't keep clogging up the messageboards with these long sermons. But I enjoy talking with everyone so much.