Can't get the fat girl out of my head

I know many before me have posted about this, and I am sure all the newbies can't imagine feeling like this - but you may at some point, and if you don't that's totally awesome.

I have not lost much in the past 6 weeks - maybe 7 more pounds total (which I am fine with), but I have been noticing a lot more comments about my appearance. People will say things like you look so skinny and how much did you lose, and I cant ever imagine you were that big or don't lose any more.

I am honestly, not that skinny. I am 5'5" and now weigh 160.5. However, in my head I either had a really distorted image of myself when I was large and not so in charge, or I just will never get the fat girl out of my mind. For some reason I really don't think I look that much different.

How do others cope with this (besides therapy b/c honestly, talking about this for hours will do me no good)?

To put me into perspective, Im SOOO happy with where I am at. I have another 15 to go but my goal isn't so much pounds, its getting fit and healthy and in shape AND MAINTAINING and if I don't hit my goal, I am happy with my surgeons goal of 160. I eat what I am supposed to, I drink what I am supposed to and don't go so overboard on exercise, but I do something at least 3 times per week.

Hell - I fit into a juniors size 8/10. But why when I look in the mirror will I never see what others telling me I should see?

Any personal experiences are welcome.

Well I'm sure you look good 160 is awesome.  I weigh 178 and I feel beautiful.  I have worked so hard to look this way as I'm sure you have to. Don't be so hard on yourself rememberhow big you were and how far you come. I love that I can wear tight clothes or short shorts and not look ddisgusting.  Go get your self a new cute out fit and rock it. Be proud of yourself. 

Thanks Jenn! I appreciate the kind words.

I know exactly where you're coming from!  No matter how many times I've lost the weight (and there have been many over the past 40 years)...I still see myself fat!  I know the clothes say I'm smaller, but the reflection staring back at me in the mirror, still has the same fat shape!  I get the tape measure out...sure enough, I'm smaller, but the reflection doesn't change!  I like the idea (when I get to my goal) of getting that new outfit and taking lots of pictures!!

One thing that helps me is to go back and try on a piece of clothing from before surgery, it really helps to sink how much smaller I am now compared to where I started.

Looking at pictures, especially side by side with old pictures, really, really helps me.  It also helps me to do this with a loving partner who will point out specifics about the changes in my body.  

Based on what I've read from some of the vets, it's mainly a matter of time and we'll get more used to this.  I had surgery around the same time as you and have almost the same stats, so I'm right there with you.  Despite wearing smaller clothes than I can ever remember wearing (and being thrilled about this), the girl in the mirror looks almost the same as before surgery.  Maybe it's because we don't recognize our new bodies so our brains revert to the old ones. :)  My philosophy is that I don't want to remember how I used to look, so I'm did not take "before" pictures and measurements - I just want to forget that I was ever that large, so I'm going to bide my time and wait for the new normal to take hold. No looking back, just moving forward. Congratulations on your success!!

I'm having the opposite experience. Lost a lil bit of weight and I think I look fly as all get out. Stare at myself in every reflective surface. LMFAO. I'm still fat as **** though, and only one third of the way.  But for the first time in a looooong time, I feel so good.

You have CRUSHED this weight loss thing. You're doing so well. Everyone else is admiring the results of your hard work and complimenting you. Bask in it. Strut your stuff. Your mind will catch up and see what everyone else does. I don't know you, but I'm proud of you. This is not easy. Celebrate your accomplishments.

Try looking at mybodygallery.com.  You can enter in your height and weight and see pics of women with the same measurements.  Maybe seeing someone else will help you see better what you look like.

I'm the opposite too (in a way)  when I look in the mirror most of the time I think yeah okay, over weight but still okay.  Then when I see a photo, it's like whoa... is that me or did someone do some photoshop inflating to make me look like an enormous blimp person.

I also refine my level of disdain for bits of my body I don't particularly like as I am losing weight and a lot of the time if the issue in your head is more about your body shape type, you never get to change the proportions that upset or bother you at any weight.

Like as an extreme example - even when I was super skinny (for me - Aus 10 - US 6-8).  I would still be able to start a fire with my inner thighs if I needed to walk a bit in a skirt or with bare legs.  There is no thigh gap, there never will be - this is fine, I've dealt with this.

I have an issue with extra lumpy bits under my armpits, and you all think oh yeah fat... nope I am jealous of other fat women's armpits... mine is breast tissue growing under my arm - on top of the fat.  That will only go away with surgery.

One thing I saw recently made quite a big impact on me - I am not sure it cured anything, but I do think it made things slightly less painful.  If you google Dove Sketches Case Study.

It's fantastic work where people describe themselves to a sketch artist and then someone who has met them describes them to the sketch artist as well and the sketch artist doesn't see them.  It really is worth watching some of the videos on youtube or wherever you can.

Maybe you could also do a things I can do now list or things I feel comfortable wearing now list or something along those lines and refer to it like people do with affirmations.  Louise Hay in her book how to heal your life also does an exercise where you look yourself in the mirror and say I love you.  You could do that with bits of your body.

Also, you know how sometimes when you buy a watch or a bangle and you notice it now and then out of the corner of your eye (because you are so used to your wrist being bare) and think wow that looks nice.  If anything like that comes up with your lean body like wow look how there are no rolls of back fat when I tie my bra or something like that - milk it. Really milk it.

Probably want to do this one in secret - find a person who is definitely bigger in size than you are, but you look at them and think they look great. Then compare piece by piece.  She looks great, and I wear a pants 2 sizes smaller than her, so logically I look better (obviously only works if you are a healthy weight).  Repeat ad nauseum

those are my ideas on how to change your thoughts about your body.  Good Luck!