CuriousLady2020’s Posts
ladygodiva1228, sorry, I haven't been on my computer for a few days, got an eye infection and had to back off it. It sounds like you and your husband have things figured out on supporting each other, nice to hear and I am thankful you shared this information. I have always thought communication is the key as well, so I'll have to encourage my daughter to be perfectly honest and clear when she communicates with him, and he in return.
Sorry to hear about your hubby's back but glad he got inspired to lose weight and get off some meds, good for him! I'm sure with you supporting him, he was feeling good about his progress.
Thank you!
Oh, I hadn't even thought of that. He is overweight, and maybe he is thinking that. Their date nights revolve around eating out at nicer restaurants, so you have raised a very interesting point, thank you. Wow, there is a lot to think about! How do you all get so smart! Thank you, ladygodiva1228! Wise words!
In answer to her talking to him about it, I think she shared it with me first to see if I noticed anything weird and yes, it's going on for sure. I want to be understanding of it all so I don't judge him, it may not be his fault. I'm going to suggest she have a nice long talk with him so they're discussing what might come up before it becomes them fighting about it.
White Dove, it's strange to think that my son in law may be thinking she will be attractive to someone else, but then we don't understand the psychology of others, so I'll just get the book and ask her to consider reading it, and to join this website and find some friends on this website. I found the second edition of the book online for about $10.
I know she had a psychological evaluation prior to surgery, but it doesn't seem like there are enough warnings as to the great changes in the relationship that can occur. Theirs might not be major yet, but if they don't communicate clearly and honestly, I can tell it could get to that point, and with two children in the mix.
This is good insight for me, don't forget to communicate, even without surgery!
Thanks, White Dove. It is hard to watch but I care about them both so I will stay out of the middle, I want my "mom" relationship with her hubby to continue being a good one and she and I get along just great. I may suggest she read the book first, not sure.
Thank you for the book reference. I can't say to much since it's their problem together, but she did confide in me so I want to help even if it's in support and suggesting a book. I love him too, he's a good guy, just seems thrown off track somehow.
Counseling could be an option, we'll see what she says about it first then she can go from there. He's never been a great communicator but we'll see what they come up with together.
Hello everyone,
I have not posted on here recently since I was waiting on my daughter's surgery process. Well, she had the surgery at the beginning of last month, and she's doing well. I appreciate the advice I got on this site on how best to support her.
Now there is another problem that I can't do much about, but I'm hoping to understand it. Her husband is acting oddly since she has started to act more active and exercising. She said he speaks to her less and acts kind of like she's on her own at home. He used to help with lite housework, but has stopped all that and seems to avoid being in the same room except for dinner and sleeping. Is this normal for a spouse to start behaving like this?
TheWombat, good reminder about a robe. Those hospital gowns are less than helpful at covering, so a light robe would be smart, thanks.
White Dove, thank you. Just getting an idea since I'm a supporter. It looks like you really don't stay long, so no need for anything frilly, right?
Hello jbskaggs,
I am a support person for someone going through the surgery process soon, but read your post and had to say I'm praying for the best outcome for you. Just stopping by to wish you the best.
Hi everyone,
I'm supporting my daughter in this process and I'm wondering what you took to the hospital in your bag and what was the most helpful item you took?
Thanks!
White Dove, I myself can rarely eat meat that is reheated in the microwave unless it's done at a low temp and is actually reheated and not cooked again, so I am understanding how something zapped in there could be too dry for her to eat, it makes sense.
I have to say, I've never tried McCormick Au Jus mix, so I will now! I have two great roasts I need to prepare. Thanks!
TheWombat, that's a great reminder, to not encourage having another serving. I used to be guilty of that when we had large family/friends bbq's, but not so much anymore since our parties are less and the kids are grown. Now I do exactly what your friend did, I place the food out and they can take what they can. I'm glad you mentioned it though, as I wouldn't want to fall back to that once she's had surgery, or even before.
Try to have a great weekend!
White Dove,
Wow, 13 years! You must have a trunk full of tried and true recipes! I happen to have an InstaPot, so this could be a good way to go for myself as well, cutting out a lot of carbs. They are trouble for me, since I have always liked rice, potato, and pasta dishes.
Thanks so much, I'm grateful for this community!
OnlineAnnie,
Thank you for offering the info, every bit I learn is helpful, and I'm finding I need to let her guide me, not the other way around! This is a big decision for her, but the point is for her to be healthier for life, so I'm behind it.
hollykim, Thank you for this guidance, it's very valuable to me. I'm not a pushy person at all, so will let her know I support her all the way, but need her advice on what I can stock and prepare along the way.
Thanks, jenorama! I think I'll continue researching and know that she will have to let me know what she's tolerating at the time. It's not quite time yet...with this crisis going on.
Hello everyone,
I have been under the weather for a bit with health issues of my own, but my daughter is starting through this process and I want to be able to be prepared since they visit a lot (hopefully in the future when we can) for dinners. Is there a place I can get menu information from that is vsg friendly so I can lean that way to support her both before and after surgery when she can eat solid food?
Thank you and be safe!
Thank you very much, Sparlekitty. I'll order it and start reading right away. This is the best place I've ever found to get information from a number of people, very grateful. What a great community!
Hello..I'm trying to learn as much as I can about surgeries prior to my daughter deciding on her surgery type so I can support her. Does the gas after surgery occur with all surgery types, or is is tied just to VSG? Anything people can help me learn is appreciated. I'm taking notes!
Jojobby08, it looks like you're getting some good advice! Hope you feel better!