Just starting & worried about my relationship!

on 9/19/16 11:28 am

I am in the early stages of planning WLS. I went to a seminar & have my appointment scheduled with the surgeon October 7th. Me & My husband of 19yrs along with my 15yr old twins are big foodies. My husband has a history of gaining & losing weight. He has run in the NYC marathon in the past. My kids are a healthy normal weight. Currently my husband is overweight & over eating. Sometimes I look at what he eats & I shake my head. I told him I am worried about our relationship after my surgery if he continues to eat the way he eats & I can't. He says "we've been through a lot together in the past(infertility & IVF) & we'll make it through this". Please help with any advice!!!!! 

on 9/27/16 1:46 pm
RNY on 09/05/17


I am also concerned with my partner and her reaction to my surgery. She also claims to be fully secure in the future of the relationship. but i understand your worries. I can't give you any advice except do you trust him? and if so you have to try to believe him. you can make it through with a lot of communication and caring. i have to believe this for you and for me


I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday!

Highest weight 311/ Weight day of surgery 271/One Month 257/ Two Months 247.5 / Three Months 241/ Four months 234/ Five months 228

on 9/27/16 1:58 pm

Yes yes yes I totally trust him. We've been through a lot together including infertility. We have an extremely strong bond. I'm sure everything will be fine but there will be bumps. It's more me worrying about the bumps. I like everything to be a bed of roses. I'm sure it's my own insecurity. Thank you for your support! 

Beam me up Scottie
on 10/8/16 8:03 pm
DS on 02/17/06 with
Weight loss surgery ...and the changes it will bring to you are going to be dramatic. I have read posts on here that indicate (from the research) that divorce is slightly higher amongst those post WLS.

I think that WLS makes good relationships better, and while it doesn't make bad relationships worse, it exposes all the emotions that were once hidden behind a relationship with food.

If you are worried, start some counseling (individual or couple therapy). Obviously your basing your fear on something-and you should address that fear.

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