cathy in maryland

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You Know You've Had Gastric Bypass Surgery When.........

• *I have a date" does not mean you're going out.
  
• *You have baby food in the house and no baby.
  
• * "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
  
• * All of your silverware says Gerber.
  
• * A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
  
• * "Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
  
• * New clothes fall off in a week.
  
• * You get excited about hand me downs.
  
• * The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
  
• * Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
  
• * "Just water for me please".
  
• * Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
  
• * You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
  
• * When your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
  
• * When you get excited that your incision was "only 4 inches".
  
• * When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
  
• * Other women are calling you names behind your back.
  
• * When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there". * When you really don't have a thing to wear.
  
• * You have to prove you are the person on the drivers license.
  
• * You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
  
• * You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeon's card.
  
• * You are never parted from a bottle of water
  
• * When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
  
• * Being too small for your britches.
  
• * When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
  
• * When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
  
• * When you go to the mall and take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
  
• * You truly are a "cheap date".
  
• * When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
  
• * When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
  
• * You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar.
  
• * Vitamins feel like a meal.
  
• * You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
  
• * You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair?"
  
• * You can cross your legs... both of them
  
• * Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
  
• * When your obsession from food turns to your scale.
  
• * They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
  
• * No more velcro shoes
  
• * Tongs are no longer to fry chicken.
  
• * "Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
  
• * When your stairmaster is no longer used for drying your fine washables
  
• * Your mother says "You don't eat enough"
  
• * When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have success with this."
  
• * Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
  
• * You can wear corderoy pants without igniting a fire
  
• * When you wave and your upper arms wave back
  
• * You safety pin your underwear *
  
• *Someone phones and thinks your husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
  
• * Cannot blame the cat for shedding
  
• * Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
  
• * 3 Lean Cuisines a week and that's your total grocery purchase
  
• * The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god..did he die???
  
  

1. I want to simply be able to keep up with my 4 children on a family outing without being asked if I'm ok all the time.
   
   
2. I intend to find the biggest,baddest,fastest roller coaster around and ride it with my 15 yr old son.
   
   
3. I've always loved the ocean...kissed my hubby for the first time at the beach when i was 15 yrs old...I want to go to the beach and not have to worry about what I look like in a bathing suit.
   
   
4. I want to be able to walk up a flight of stairs instead of always waiting for the elevator/escaltor.
   
   
5. I want to be able to go to any restaurant anywhere and not have to worry about the booth they always seem to stick me in.( I think it's a joke among the wait staff...to stick a fat person in a booth and watch em squirm their way in and out of it)
   
   
6. I want to be able to walk the mall with my family and not always have to cut the time short cause of my feet/legs/lower back hurting
   
   
7. I want to go places with my husband and not feel like people are wondering "What's HE doing with HER!?!"( For that matter I want to stop feeling like that about me too!)
   
   
8. I want to be able to wear all the jewelry I have sitting in my jewelry box again. I miss my engagement ring!
   
   
9. I want to be able to sleep at night without waking up gasping for air when I'm not on my cpap machine
   
   
10. I want to buy a "1 size fits all" night shirt and not be the 1 size it doesn't fit...
    
    
11. I want to walk into a room/store/clinic/classroom and not "hear comments" even if they're not really saying anything about me or my weight. Does that make sense? In my head I hear them even if they're not saying them outloud
    
    

 

July 27 2005
Wow I can't believe it's been so long since I updated my profile. I'm just over 3 months out now and i'm down 74lbs! I'm feeling great physically but dealing with all the saggy skin is more emotional then I thought it would be. And OMG losing my boobs...driving me INSANE! I've gone from a full 44DD to about a 40/42C and they are so NOT full. It probably sounds like a silly thing to stress over but I do and often. My hubby is without a doubt a major boob man and mine have never been this small *sigh* or saggy in the entire 20yrs I've been with him. He tells me they don't bother him, they only bother me...and I'm always making jokes about getting 2 new boobs for Christmas. Other then that I'm doing really well with everything. I don't really "dump" the most people describe it...I just get queasy, my heart pounds and I'd love a nap but it never lasts more then maybe 20 mins. I'm a classic textbook example of a perfect RNY...no complications...a slight amount of dumping syndrome...I can eat things with up to 10grams of sugar...i can even eat a bite or two of fried chicken now and then. Have I cheated? Yep occasionally I do but I don't think of it as "cheating". I've had a bite of my children's birthday cakes...tasted a chocolate chip cookie my son has baked..a bite of strawberry shortcake....things like that. Funny thing is as badly as I thought I wanted whatever it was I tasted a taste of it was more then enough. I didn't feel cheated and I felt 'normal" and my craving for it was satisfied with that 1 bite. I think I have finally reached a point in my life where I can say without a doubt I'M in control of my weight. Emotionally I'm still on a ride but it's not as twisty and chaotic as a roller coaster anymore. It's more like those spinning tea cups lol! I look at myself and I'm thrilled at my weight loss and yet there are times I look at myself and I'm sad because i don't recognize the face looking back at me. I have alot of mental issues with the saggy skin and I'm working on them but it's not easy...don't ever think for a minute this surgery is easy. It's the hardest thing I've ever done emotionally and mentally. Physically it was a piece of cake...lol ok bad choice of words but you know what I mean.

June 10, 2005
I'm 6 weeks out today and 48lbs lighter,to say I'm thrilled would be an understatement! I even occasionally forget i had the surgery since I've only dumped twice( once on a banana and once on a freakin bite of Totino's pizza roll) and I rarely get things stuck. I can eat about 99.9% of everything I've tried with no problem and I eat whatever I make for the rest of the family. Yep i eat pizza...I eat mashed potatos,rice and pasta too. I went into this surgery determined that this was NOT going to be just another 'diet' situation for me. This surgery gave me the chance at a new life...not a life sentence. It's working for me...I follow my surgeon and nutritionists plans and I've lost almost 50lbs because of it

May 25, 2005

Wow it was brought to my attention yesterday that I haven't updated my profile in a month and I honestly hadn't realized it had been that long. I'm doing reallllly really well. I've lost 39lbs since my surgery and I'm thrilled about it! Do I miss being able to eat like before? I was positive I would,at least for awhile, but I have to tell you the only thing I really miss is chocolate. My surgeon and nutritionist have a routine that pretty much lets me eat anything i want...including a bit of taters,rice,pasta and bread IF my new tummy lets me...and it lets me. The only thing I've had problems with is bananas and the bite I stole( that'll teach me to steal!) of hubby's totino's pizza roll. I've been able to eat chicken,beef( steak,roast and ground beef),pork and seafood without ANY problem at all. I'm a "text book example of the perfect WLS patient" as I've had no complications and no throwing up or queasiness like I've read on the boards for the last year. My surgeons plan is to make my life after WLS a NEW way of life NOT a diet for the rest of my life. People get hung up with "cheating" and foods they "can't eat". I know for myself, tell me I can't and I want to even more. I was given a list of common sense foods we have to stay away from but a lot on my list I've seen people say they can't eat or aren't "allowed" to eat. There's no way I could live the rest of my life feeling guilty if I wanted a bite of pizza or a toasted bagel 1/2. THIS works for ME! I'm not saying this is the best for anybody else or that everybody's doctor that is different is wrong...i'm just saying my surgeons plan works for me and makes this surgery feel like a way of life instead of a life sentence.

April 14, 2005
Had my filter put in this morning and it really wasn't bad at all. I was slightly loopy but i chatted...ok rambled..with Dr Smoot through the whole thing. I even watched the procedure on the monitor, which trust me if I wasn't loopy wouldn't have happened. I did end up with a back ache, now whether this was from the filter or the table in radiology I'm not sure but percocet took care of the pain....and the next 4 or 5 hours after taking it i was oblivious to everything.



April 18, 2005
It's Monday and in 4 days at about this time i'll be in the operating room. I don't even know where to begin to describe my emotions right now. They're really all over the scale and they swing! Perfect example was yesterday my 11 yr old twins were bickering back and forth over who had to pick up what in the bedroom they share. Now this is a daily occurance and has been since they were 3 yrs old and started picking up their toys. While it's an annoying habit it is in fact fairly normal for my house. Why then did I sit there crying for about 10 minutes? My hubby kept right on making breakfast( him and my oldest son cook HUGE breakfasts every Sunday together) and let me cry. He made the kids plate and shoo'd em out of the kitchen,gave me a hug and asked why I was crying. *grin* Smart man that he is when it comes to me didn't even crack a smirk when I told him I didn't even know what I was crying about and THAT'S why I was crying! I know I swore I was canceling my surgery at least 3 times yesterday. Usually around the time he had a hard time handling one of my twins( my son's ADHD and bipolar and was having a mood swinging day himself) I know the emotional roller coaster is normal...I read it...I thought I prepared for it...but OMG the closer that date gets the more bizarre my moods get. I wanted to sit down and right family letters " just in case" but I've tried 3 times and each time I sent myself into a panic attack which can't possibly be good for me.I guess I'll just write some of what i wanted to say in here...it doesn't seem to set off panic attacks I just wanted to tell my husband that yes, i know 16 yrs of being married to me hasn't been easy but I wouldn't trade a single day of us together for anything in the world...and yes, it took me too long to realize that and I'm VERY lucky he stuck around until I did. He's the love of my life and I'm one very lucky woman to have such a special husband. My oldest son...a mom couldn't ask for a better teenager. If the worse thing he ever does is dye his hair blonde and hand out smart ass remarks I'll consider the teenage years a success! He knows how much I love him and how much I grew up just by having him. He's going to be an incredible man one day,I can see it everytime I watch him interact with people. I'm SO proud of him! My twins...I fought so hard to have them...they were very much wanted and loved before they were even born. I started contractions with them at about 3 1/2 months pregnant,spent the rest of the time on total bedrest trying to make sure nothing happened to them. They were born 5 weeks premature and just turned 11 yrs old on Saturday. *smile* From the second they were born I never had a dull moment in my life again! They're fraternal twins and in some ways as different as night & day...in others they're more alike then they'll ever admit. I love them both with all my heart and every grey hair they've given me since I was 24 :) My baby...she was born right after my 30th birthday and sheis my angel baby,i love her to bits . She's a "mini me"...she looks alot like me,acts even more like me and let me tell y'all now...BOYS are easier to raise then girls. I always wanted at least one girl...sorry sons but y'all loooked funny in ponytails and pink dresses ;) Well, let me let y'all in on a little secret...a girl with 3 older brothers doesn't act like a girl at all! lol She's all boy without the plumbing. She's one of my biggest fears about this surgery. I wouldn't want to leave any of my children but IF something were to happen the 3 oldest have memories of us...pillow fights,water fights,laughin,tickling,decorating for the holidays....my 4 yr old wouldn't have all of those. But also because of her and her brothers I'll be in the OR on Friday...I plan on being healthy enough to have pillow fights with my grandkids!

April 20, 2005

48hrs from exactly this second I should be in the OR....but ummm I'm not obsessing...really!

April 28,2005

Ok i figured it was about time to update this and I'm feeling human today so I better get it all down before it fades. The morning of the surgery is really such a blur that I'm not sure I remember much about even getting to the hospital. I checked in around 6am and was sent to get into the hospital gown and was told I'd be going in around 830. Dr.S came in to see me to make sure I was doing ok and to answer any questions I had. He told my hubby and my dad pretty much he'd see them when he was done and he'd be done when he got done,he doesn't watch clocks. I liked that attitude! Then I was wheeled down to the recovery room area and met with OR nurses. i wasn't there very long before taken to the OR to be prep'd...lol seems everybody from there on out for the next 12 hours liked my butterfly tatoo. Then in the OR all I remember was the nurses telling me hi and not to worry they'd take really good care of me. I kinda remember waking up in the recovery room off and on. :) I do remember Melissa( from Dr Smoot's office) coming in to see me and next thing I knew I was in my room. I don't know how I got there, how long I'd been there but I was kinda awake and out of the OR...that's all that mattered to me. I found out the surgery took a bit longer then expected and I ended up with a drain but whatever he had to do to make it right worked for me! I was up and walking Friday night although because of the morphine joy buzzer I was given Friday night is a bit of a fuzzy blur to me. I do know my hubby and dad were there when i walked around the nurses station but I honestly don't remember that walk much. By Saturday I had my catheter,drain and iv removed. The IV wasn't by choice,trust me I liked the morphine...my hand was swollen to the point of not being able to bend my fingers and they never could get a vein to do a new IV. By 1pm Sunday I was discharged and on my way home.

March 10th,2005
OMG! I have a date....April 19th at 8am I'll be having a Lap RNY. I had to meet with all the 'team members' in my surgeons office yesterday,it actually helped relieve me of any anxiety I was having yesterday. Dr Smoot and I discusses lap vs open and helped me make an informed choice without pushing me into one direction or the other. He just sat with me and gave me all his statstics and personal experiences with both surgeries, he really eased any concerns I had about choosing one way vs the other. Then i got to see Cindy their behavior counselor...she's AWESOME,very,very sweet lady. LOL She's one of the very few people to ever see me cry( I HATE crying!)but some of those questions she was asking hit way too close to home for comfort I guess. :) Then I saw Dianne( exercise and nutrition) who told me if i hate Curves to quit it.lol I was kinda wow'd by that,she made a good point though...going into it hating it was gonna make it really hard to keep doing it the rest of my life.Then last but not least I saw Chris who helped us understand the whole process from walking into the hospital to waking up in recovery.

March 22,2005
Exactly one month from right this second I should be in surgery and I have to admit while I'm thrilled and excited I find myself crying a lot more then I usually do. I have a very busy month coming up...hubby is Army and he'll be out of town for a week starting Easter...4 kids and Spring break....I have my pre admit appointment on the 12th in the after noon and a support group meeting that night...I go in for my filter on the 14th...my twins will be 11 on the 16th and I change my life forever on the 22nd. I'm hoping with all the things to keep me busy the next month will fly by. My husband is being super supportive and that helps keep me focused on the good results of this surgery. Unfortunately the "what if's" slip in every now and then and i worry about how he'll handle 4 kids alone should something happen to me. I know this is normal and i try to remind myself of that and not dwell on it too much. I've been walking and OMG my ankles are killing me but I AM doing it and that's what matters. I've started stocking up on SF foods and drinks and been searching the net for high protein food that will be easy to puree since i have to be on that for 7-10 days. I have to tell ya...lol pureed chicken sounds naaaaassssty! I'm kinda sketchy on what constitues "pureed" too....is it the consistancy of a shake so i have to sip it...or more like a mash potato or cottage cheese consistancy?

February 3 2005

I had my cardiology appointment 2 days ago and was cleared by him for surgery at 2:30 pm. I was home and called my surgeons office by 3:00 and at 3:05 Melissa called me back and said my paperwork was faxed to my ins. company for approval. OMG she's AWESOME!!!! She said that hopefully within 7-10 days we'd know something. *GRIN* I've been very very patient with all this...waited a year to get to this step so of course I'm gonna wait those 7-10 days...yeah ooook lol. i called Tricare this morning because their policy is to wait 72 hours...ok so it was ALMOST 72 hours give or take 6 hours or so. The phone rep was really sweet...said she had the report and everything i could possibly need was in it and that I "should" know something by Friday. Now that it's SO close I've found myself puddling up for no reason and wondering "OMG can it REALLY be this close!?!?" And of course being a stay at home mom to 4 kids I'm totally freaked about how will they possibly live without me the 4 days I'm in the hospital. lol Yes they'll be fine but it's a mom thing! Besides hubby will be home for about a week or 10days and I have the BESTEST sister in law in the world. She's my hubby's baby sister and has been part of my life since i was 15 and she was 6. She's more like a little sister to me then simply a sister in law. Funny thing is,she's only 10 yrs older then my oldest son so THEY'RE a lot like brother and sister too. I don't have a doubt in the world she'll take wonderful care of my kids for me when I'm in the hospital.SIL has even offered to stay as long as I need her to after hubby has to go back to work too. :) I'm lucky to have the support I do and I know it...not everybody having this surgery is as lucky I'm afraid. *HUGS* Ruth(my SIL)Thanks for always being there for us!

February 4 2005

OMG I'm APPROVED!!!!!! When I called the ins they said my surgeon had Feb 21st as my surgery date. I'm hoping it can be pushed up just a couple of days( odd I know) but we have a 4 day weekend scheduled that weekend to go home to Virginia. I'd REALLY like to see my family there again before i have surgery.

*UPDATE* My second appointment is scheduled for March 9th...we'll set up a date for my filter to be done and my surgery date. YEAH!!!!!!!

January 13, 2005

I've done my lab work and have my cardiac clearance appointment set up for January 31. I was so hoping to have it set up sooner so my approval letter can be sent out. I guess whining isn't going to make it go faster and I'm actually fairly lucky because I know from reading on here lots of people have been at this a lot longer then I have. After my cardiac appointment I have to then go back to the Army docs and have them put in a referral for my echocardiogram and stress test. I have to wait 3-7 days for that to go through before I can schedule those appointments and HOPEFULLY it won't take me long to get those done.It's looking like maybe sometime in March if all goes well. I truly can't wait for this to get started. I watched Big John on the Discovery Health channel last night. He weighed over 400lbs...about 100lbs more then me...my 4 yr old walked in and said "Mommy! He has a big belly just like YOU do!" I need this surgery for my health but I also want my children to have a smaller healthier ME to have memories about when they get older.

Dec 17 2004

I went to see Dr S for my first consultation 2 days ago and i really really liked him. He was straight forward and took the time to answer any and all questions. He's been doing this surgery since I was a kid so I have confidence in his ability. He also has long term after care(3-5 yrs) and I like that part. He doesn't simply do the surgery,collect the bill and say see ya! I had a 4 1/2 hour consultation( me and 2 other patients)where we went through a talk about how we have to change our eating habits with a memeber of his staff and then we went through a step by step discussion of the surgery with Dr. S. I felt totally at ease and walked away feeling so much better about this surgery. :) All I have to do is lab work( was s'posed to do that this morning but drank some juice before I remembered I had to fast before the bloodwork) and I have to see a cardiologist for cardiac clearance. Finally the end( or beginning really) seems to be within sight. I'm SO excited!