2ndchance
Lap Band out
Jun 28, 2009
I'm still at 193 two years later with nothing to show for it but two years of regret, scars, and guilt of what I've done to my body that God gave me.
New doctor in Fort Worth, TX
Jun 20, 2009
Please....God keep me safe during this surgery....I have sooo much to live for.
Lap band removal....
Jun 14, 2009
I have had sooo many troubles with my band and my doctor finally approved me for removal. I'll call this week to schedule the surgery and get the paperwork moving.
Wow, I'm soo scared but really want my band out. I'm tied of the pain of failure and pain from my band that is 'empty'.
I'm scared of another surgery but as a mom and and a wife, I want my life and family back.
Pray for me that all goes well in surgery.
I've kept my weight at the same after my last post and even maintained it after the birth of my daughter a year ago. I pray for strenght to continue to fight the fight while staying healthy for me and my famly.
9mths - 2wks post op
Jan 24, 2008
Fills -- With Dr. Brader leaving Barix I was caught up in the lack of appointments available and in Sept I had only a 1.5 fill at 5 months out of surgery. I feel like my journey with the lap-band at that time and at this point has not been successful and wonder if I made a mistake.
Move - We moved from PA to Fort Worth, TX in Sept and lived in a hotel for 50 days. During the time from Sept to December, we moved across the country, lived in a hotel, bought a house, moved into the new house, unpacked, I home-schooled my son to prevent him from being in 3 schools in one semester, my Director & Assistant Director at my job were released, and I managed to remain employed. Yes, the last few months have been tough.
Band - During this time, I found a doctor in Dallas, but they do not perform fills under fluoroscopy -- and the office is too far from my new house in South Fort Worth. So I'm looking for a doctor in Fort Worth. However, with my 1.5 fill in the band, I was gagging on everything. I'm not sure if it was all the stress or what, but I couldn't even enjoy a few bits of food with my family at meal time.
When I visited my new doctor, they told me that I was eating wrong. Well, I was eating how I was trained at Barix so that was discouraging. I asked them and begged for them to look inside to see if something was wrong, but they refused. So I went home and tried again. The gagging did not stop, so I went back to the doctor, and they told me again that I was eating wrong and put in a fill to 1.8. I was eating how they told me to eat but I just felt in my heart that something was wrong. I went home and went back two weeks later to have them take out some of the fill to 1.5. The gagging slowed up some, but I felt like I couldn't eat anything and my son (age 11) was freaking out because I was gagging on a daily basis. At this point, I just wanted to rip the band out of my body because the discomfort and the lack of quality time with my family at mealtimes was not worth it to me.
Two weeks later, I conceived a baby and went back to the doctor in Dallas to request them take out more of the fill because I was still not doing well and couldn't eat much of anything. They wanted to leave the fill at 1.5, but I requested it go to 1cc due to all the prior problems that I have had in the last few weeks. Now I'm at 1cc and can eat food to feed my baby. :-). I'm happy to be pregnant and I'm glad that I have not gained any weight at this 16 week point. I'll have the remaining fill taken out later in the pregnancy if needed. The doctor in Dallas asked me to come back in January for a check-up and I did that last week. I questioned them again about not being willing to look inside when patients have problems and was told they only do that if you are gagging everyday. Hello --- that is what I was in here about months ago and you just told me I was eating wrong. I'm searching for a new doctor that will do fills under fluoroscopy for the future.
Update: I want this band to work, but if I have trouble eating with such little fill, I have to think that something is wrong and may need it removed at a later time. I know that its negative thinking, but I have gagged more in the last 6 months than I have in my whole life and to me its just not worth it.
Faith: I want to have faith that all will work out. I have wanted this band for years and want to be a success story not a failure. I'm glad that I'm at 193 at 16 weeks into this pregnancy and I hope not to gain too much weight. At this point my band with 1cc fill is allowing me to eat enough food to keep my baby healthy. My doctor is okay with the band and stated that she has a lot of moms with lap-bands nowdays. She just doesn't want me to loose any weight. I want this band to be as positive as my life. Only a few people in my family (and my husbands) even know that I have the band. I just didn't want it to be a topic of converstaion. :-)
Clothes: I find it amazing to read others stories and hear that people at 190 can wear size 12 clothes. I'm still at a size 14/16 and seem happy to be there for the time being. I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to wear small clothes even with the weight loss without surgery on my stomach. Too much old fat/skin to tuck it all in (smile)......
Weight loss -- I have lost 33 lbs to date and for that I'm grateful. I do not feel like my weight is in the way of life anymore -- and for that I'm grateful. I'm grateful for my family and our new baby on the way.
Keeping the faith at 193
226/193/140
8.5.07 16 weeks post op
Aug 05, 2007
I had my first official fill on Aug 2nd, 16 weeks after surgery. Due to Dr. Brader leaving, and Dr. Poe taking his patients, it has been tough to get an appointment. I guess I feel like the last 10 weeks have been wasted. I should have had my first 'real' fill at 6 weeks.
Anyway, since this fill a few days ago, I can feel the restriction. Yea, this is what I paid so much money for. For some help w/eating less food.
I'm off to
I'll write more after the trip to let everyone know if I was able to 'keep' off my weight while on travel.
Keeping the faith at 198.
7.5.07 12 weeks post op
Jul 07, 2007
Even though it has been 12 weeks, I have not lost much weight. I have had problems with appointments at Barix Clinics. It seems that some doctors only see patients one day every other week, and if you are out of town, you are out of luck. I had an appointment scheduled for 7.10.07, but received a call that Dr. Brader is no-longer w/the clinic. The next appointment available was the week of July 16th with a new doctor, and I will be on vacation. So as a result, I have to wait until the next available on Aug 2nd. At that point, I will be 5 months out with only one primer fill.
So at this point, I have only had one primer fill and I'm 4 months out from my surgery. Very disappointing to me.
I plan on calling once a week to see if there are any cancellations.
I guess if I could give advice, before you have your surgery, find out the information for appointment availability at your location.
In all, I'm very disappointed with my follow-up care at Barix clinic. If they were more flexible with the appointments, I think I could have been on a larger weight loss schedule. I have no restriction and can eat anything. At the same time, I try to regulate my food intake, but to me, it seems just like I'm trying to diet before the surgery.
For what it is worth,
Keeping faith at 200
226/200/140
5.31.07 --- 7 weeks post-op
May 31, 2007
My weight is not moving much, but I feel much better about myself. I think I will be a slow looser. I felt like I was at the same weight for 3 to 4 weeks. Some days going up and down 5 lbs in the same day. I was so disappointed.
I have started exercising on the Core Ball and that has made me hurt in more places than I care to admit.
However, life is good and I'm thankful for my faith, family, and friends.
Keeping faith at 201.5
226/201.5/140
5.10.07 4 weeks post-op
May 10, 2007
This past week has been very smooth as far as the diet. As for body changes, I can wear my necklace w/out it bothering me at night. My rings feel loose and my clothes feel loose. As for sleep, I have been very restless, I usually sleep on my back, but have been sleeping on my side and trying to sleep on my stomach. I stopped sleeping in any position other than my back for a long time because my arms would fall asleep. So other than waking up quite a bit (again), I can sleep on my side for now. I have to wonder if the low amount of carbs is causing me not to stay awake more.
My liquid intake has gone down due to eating pureed foods. I know that is not an excuse, so this is something I have to work on. I think it will also help w/the weight loss. My goal is to drink 16 oz by 10, 1, 3, & 7. (I have to try to be finished by 7 pm so it will not keep me up all night).
I guess what everyone wants to know is weight loss. I have only lost one pound this week and down 7.5 inches. I'm at 205, but 4 days ago the scale said 203 so I'm not sure what has happened inside this body of mine. I'll try to get in my liquids each day to help w/the weight loss. Because I know that I'm eating much less food than I ever have in my whole life ..... Like only 800 to 1000 calories a day so as a result, the weight should be going down. When I start on regular foods, I'm going to start tracking everything in fitday.com or some other type of food tracking system. It is hard to track the foods when they are all blended together.
As for measurements, I'm measuring the following areas: neck, bust, top arms, wrist, Waist (at bend), belly button area, hips, thighs, and calves.
As for exercise, I'm walking 4 days a week for 1 hour (about 3 miles). Maybe I need to do more? I'll do what I can.
I look forward to eating dinner w/my family and eating the same foods just smaller amounts. It has been easier for me to just leave the table vs. watching them eat the nice looking salads etc...
Keeping Faith at 205
226/205/140
38.9/35.3/24
3rd week post op
May 03, 2007
My three weeks of liquids are finished. I have had a good week and feel good. I have been exercising so that is helping, but also feel that the added exercise will temporally reduce weight loss.... muscle weighs more than fat.... but at the same time, I'm going to keep walking knowing that it will help in the long run.
I have also had a hard time drinking my water. I'm really trying but also know that it is not helping....
I posted my first experience on pureed foods in a prior message today. It was not as good as I thought. It felt tight and made me nervous.
I hope it gets better.... don't think I can live like this...
Trying to stay positive and keeping the faith.... At least if this does not workout, it is reversible..... I know, I should not think this way, but yesterday on my first time on pureed food (mind you like stage 2 baby food) did not go well.
Until next week,
Signing off at 206
1st time to try pureed foods....
May 03, 2007
I posted this on the board.... thought I would post on my personal page.
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I will admit that I also tried some egg salad type food last night and pureed it (it looked like yellow **^%$) ... But it tasted very good.... My first time on pureed food.
I took two very small bits and automatically felt a tightness in my chest and felt like it was at the back of my throat. I was and am very disappointed. I have been 100% on liquids for 3 weeks and thought I was ready for something other than liquid.
I tried oatmeal this morning --- made it very wet --- and it went down better. However, I did not eat that much.
I'm feeling disappointed and thinking if I can't eat this wet type food then I'm never going to make it.... just take the band out....
I'm emotional today about this so thanks for posting your question on the board.
