Catek2652

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When I first talked to my PCP about losing weight, I weighed 243 pounds. This morning I weighed myself and I was 211. I'm on pureed food now until Dec 22.

im struggling to get in enough protein but am doing the purée at breakfast, lunch and dinner. I'm getting my vitamins in. Multi in the morning with my breakfast. Calcium with lunch and dinner. I take the medicine to keep down stones with lunch. My favorite meal so far was a ounce of blended smoked turkey breast. My son smoked it for his family on Thanksgiving and brought me a 3 ounce slice, so I got 3 meals out of it. 

My hot food was getting cold too fast...and I cannot gag down cold scrambled eggs...so Ken ordered me a couple of those baby plates that keeps food warm. You just fill it with hot water. This morning, I was able to get down most of a scrambled egg before I got full and it was still warm when I returned the dish to the kitchen. 

Had a bit of my husband's porkchop blended last night for dinner. We added a little beef broth for moisture. Tasted good.

I'm sipping on protein drinks as part of my fluids between meals.

ive been having withdrawal symptoms from the morphine for the last couple of days. Took me a while to recognize the symptoms. Very grumpy, phantom pain, skin crawling, restless legs at night, sweats, headaches, teeth grinding when I do sleep which is very sporadic. Starting to feel a little better today.

Started working yesterday with one pound weights to strengthen my arms. I still cannot lift more than 10 pounds.

talked to my boss yesterday and she is now developing a physical requirements document for my position. She did this to another older employee she did not like who was out on short term disability and because the woman could not meet the physical requirements was forced to retire. I'm thinking this is actually illegal since no such document has been developed for other employees but I have 6 months worth of leave and my just force her to hold my position open until I'm fully functional since my goal is to become very physically fit...well, she can just wait. Without me there she is not meeting her audit requirements. Her loss because I could do all of these jobs with some reasonable accommodations. Her loss.

ended up having four surgeries in three weeks. Finally home from the hospital on Thursday afternoon. Went through 7 IVs until they put in pick line. Had gut rebuilt four times including the original RnY. I have two issues... Sticky bowel and my surgeon said I am something called a super healer. She said she could almost see the adhesions forming they come on so fast and would harder and twist the bowel closed. I was almost transferred to another hospital to be put under her mentor's care... But we talked and I told her I trusted her to figure it out. I believed she had something to learn from me and I had something to learn from this experience.

and I did learn so much. I learned that nurses are horribly overworked and unless you are problematic you can be ignored in a hospital. I learned that my husband is the most awesome man in the world. When my body started having bowel movements, horrible messy disasters delivered with no warning ... When he was there, he took over from the nurses, cleaning me, changing sheets and pads, and did it more gently, thoroughly and with more patience and kindness to me in my embarrassment. He helped me bath, dress and walk. I missed him terribly when he had to leave for home -- a 2.5 hour drive one way. He came every day save 2.

i am home with 39 shiny staples in my belly. I have lost my belly button somewhere....

Doing ok, but my back hurts a lot because I'm so stiff.

Going to see surgeon in her clinic on Wed. 

Enjoyed tomato soup for lunch today. Working on getting protein in. I feel like I'm doing pretty well with fluids. Taking Tramodol at night to sleep and just Tylenol during the day -- liquid version. Also taking vitamins by nibbling on them like a side dish at meal times.

It is Saturday, but I have been instructed to go down to my LOCAL hospital today and get my chest Xray. I have to go through the emergency room and let them know I am an outpatient person. Hoping that goes okay.

Boss flat out told me yesterday she is not considering me for the supervisory job. Says I'm just so good at what I do now, she is not sure how she will replace me.  Let her know I will soon be looking elsewhere for work. Don't know what else I can do.

Major bout of diarhea last night. Broke down after three hours of nothing but liquid and took an imodium. Feeling exhausted this morning. Continuing to lose weight. Hope my guts can adjust to this new way of life.

I felt like I spent the day on the phone with hospitals and nurses yesterday. First, I had to figure out what to do about the vitamin issue. After finding out that Tricare Prime will no longer pay for vitamins from the one place I had been told they would; there was a bit of a panic. But thanks to hubby, and doing some on-line research, we were able to sort it out and I've ordered my vitamins from Opurity. Hubby has been collecting all of these medical receipts, special food, special vitamins, travel to and from doctors, co-pays, out of pocket costs for stuff like liquid tylenol, and says we can deduct it all from our taxes because they are a medical need. I THINK it has to reach 10% of your income (and I've had the misfortune in years past when one of my kids had heart issues and I was poor and it DID)... but I'll let him figure that out.

While I'm on the phone with a client a little while later, Dr. Spangler's Office called. It was the NUT with information about how to get vitamins using a discount. I thanked her for calling, did a quick cost comparison and even with the 30 percent discount, I'm going to stick with the Upurity vitamins. I'll still save money. Not as cheap as when Tricare was covering, but still under $100 a month.

Then, my guts decided it was time to purge. I felt no warning signs at all, but stood up from my desk and my backside exploded. I moved as quickly as could down that LOOOONg hallway to the bathroom but it was way too late. If I have too many incidents like this, I may have to ask for an office closer to the bathroom. I called Ken and, bless him, he brought me a change of underwear and took away the soiled ones. I will keep extra pairs and some large ziplock backs in my desk from now on. Hope that was just a last purge and not a peek at my future.

The worst of that was knowing that one of my coworkers (a secretary whose office is near mine) claims she can smell it everytime someone on our hallway even farts or eats something smelly for lunch and she will literally hold her breath when that person comes near her desk with something they need done. She's incredibily rude about it and frankly, I think she just says this stuff because she has decided she doesn't like someone for some reason. I have never smelled anyone in my office (other than my clients) smelling less than professional.

As bad as my blow out smelled, she said nothing. So, again, I think she makes this stuff up.

Then, I get a call from the hospital where I'm going to have my surgery and she's going through all the prework and confirming this or that and says, "Oh, you haven't got your chest xray yet. You need to come down here today and get that done." Just matter of fact Mary... I said, "hold on. No one told me I needed a chest xray or I would have had it done already and I met with Dr. Spangler Tuesday and she didn't say anything about a chest xray. I have a boat load of work to get done here before I leave for 2 weeks and clients scheduled to come in today and tomorrow. I can't just take off and drive 2 and a half hours for a chest xray that will take five minutes." She said she understood and said something about maybe having it done the morning of the surgery right before the surgery and I told her that would be just fine, hubby and I will just have to leave at 3 am instead of 3:30 a.m. She seemed shocked that this seemed like a good solution to me, but said okay. I assured her I am healthy and do not have pneumonia or other lung issues and nothing unforeseen will be found.

An hour later, I get a call from Spangler's nurse with the same issue. She wants me to go to my local hospital (where I got my blood work) and get them to do it today and they would send in the order. I explained to her that I could not leave my office like that (good gracious, I'm busy enough I had to call my husband to bring me clean underwear and didn't have time to get it myself!). I also pointed out that our itty bitty local hospital does not do routine work like this on the weekends and the results would not be read until Monday or Tuesday if I went on Saturday... if I could even get in on a Saturday. She agreed and I suggested again that the xray (which I think at this point is unneccessary) be done at the point of surgery right beforehand. Dr. Spangler can look at it herself.  She said she would look into that possibility. She didn't call back, so I will call her back myself today to make sure this is what is going to happen. I hate to be a problem child, but come on!

Then I had to chase down the doctors/nurses of several clients who had previously promised to send me diagnosis, lists of prescriptions, etc (I have the special needs caseload with mentally ill, handicapped and terminally ill people). I try to be understanding because I know everyone is super busy, but if they want to keep their patients on the street so they can continue to be their patients, I would think they could sort of make getting me the information a littler higher in the pile. These are cases in which I've been waiting for a week or more for a report. I'll be glad when I can go get the training for pharma tracking and look the stuff up myself.

Still no resolution on the job interview thing. It's scheduled for Thursday the week of my surgery. Ken said he will just put me in the car, bathrobe and all and take me there. I have to chuckle at that visual... but will play it by ear. I think it would impress one of the panel members if I showed up that soon after surgery, but another person on the panel I know would be alarmed. Hard call. I don't know who the third person is. I also don't know how functional my mind will be on Thursday. It's not an interview I want to blow. I'm thinking of sending one of the members I know an email today explaining the situation so they know. I honestly do not fully trust my boss to tell them.

Had appointment with surgeon and nutritionist yesterday. Just days to go. They were really excited to learn I had taken the initiative to put myself on a liquid diet already. Interestingly, they did not talk about a bowel cleanse at all. I will have to call the office today and find out if a couple of solid doses of Miralax will do the trick on Sunday?

Ken is getting used to cooking for himself for now. We are even going to attend a potluck on Thursday because I need to drop off some things to the people there... (hmm, sounds like I may be setting myself up here... but I know I can leave. Maybe play it by ear. If I'm feeling weak I won't go. ).

I've been headachy and very tired since going on the liquid diet. But I know this will get better. I'm just telling myself this is just another round of withdrawals... like when I quit using heroin, again when I quit drinking and again when I quit smoking. This time the addiction is to food -- in particular, sugar and flour and stuff like potatoes, rice and corn. I can recover from this, too.

My surgeon says her goal for me is to be fit and happy and will not set a weight goal. She says the majority of her patients lose 60 to 80 percent of their excess weight. For me that would 60 to 80 pounds. At 80 I would feel pretty good and able to do more... but I know 100 pounds is where I need to be to really be able and fit and happy. Unrealistic, maybe.

She was very excited that I want to start a support group for WLS folks in the Northern Neck. She has had only 4 of us from out this way herself, but knows there are many others including the nurse who takes care of her office in Tappahannock. I have a couple of friends, Debbie and Jackie who have undergone WLS and I'm sure I can find others.

Stuff to do!

I go tomorrow to see Dr. Jain-Spangler and the Nutritionist tomorrow for the last meeting before surgery day. Getting a little nervous now, but Ken, my dear husband, hugged me close this evening and asked, "Do you know how proud I am of you?"  

This may end up in losing the opportunity for a promotion as a supervisory position I put in for has not yet scheduled appointments for interviews. If it doesn't happen this week -- unlikely given the lateness -- and will likely be next week when I will be completely unable to go to a job interview. Not sure what is going to happen with that. 

But the surgery is about my life and my heath. The other is just my ego and boredom.