a_better_life81

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 I still find my self getting on the scale a couple of times a week and being frustrated and annoyed that the weight has not changed. I realized today how ridiculous that seems to be. I wouldn't be looking at weight loss surgery if what I had been doing was working! Yet, I still find myself stepping toward the scale and holding my breath while it flashes.. and Que the disappointing feeling when it hasn't.. or worse, goes up by a lb. 

I look forward to the day when I step on the scale and really see the numbers change. 

 I am the child/grandchild/great-grandchild of people who never cared about their health and ended up dying young with way too many  health problems. Well, here I am 30 years old and just over 120 lbs "over weight". So far, I am lucky. I have not health problems to speak of. No diabetes, no high BP, no apnea. However, I know that unless change is made, it's only a matter of a couple of years and I am there. 

I have struggled with weight since I had my oldest daughter via C-section 11 years ago. It's gone up and down and way up and a little down for years. It's getting harder to get the weight off in even small amounts. I am an EMT and climbing in and out of the truck all day and lifting patients is made more difficult by how much I weigh. Also, having to have 4 fire men help Carry a patient down some stairs who weighs just less than me, has shown me that how mortified I would be if someone had to carry me anywhere!

As of late, if I have been on my feet all day, the next day my knees are very sore and it takes a few steps for them to relax out and the bits of pain to stop. No, it's not age, I am barley 30..it's cause I need to drop a good 100 lbs. I was greatly embarrassed when my husband and I began looking into this that my BMI was 43.3. I was shocked and angry at myself. I finally gave in and told my husband just how much I weighed. I was so relieved when he said, "okay, well tell me what you want to do to change it and I'll do what I can to help."

I am lucky in that he supports everything I have ever wanted to do and has never once ever hinted at or acted like he loves me any differently since my weight has changed. He would do anything for me, even pledging to go on the two week pre-op liquid diet my surgeon requires!!  I love my husband dearly and I know I Will be leaning on him a great deal in the year to come. 


I was getting so depressed looking in the mirror and hating how my clothes looked. Don't even look in the mirror naked!!  I decided it's time to do something about it!! I hope this blog keeps me going and stands as a record of my short comings to keep me going in the right direction. 

I attended a weight loss surgery seminar to get started in the process. I have contacted my insurance who has said I fit into their guidelines and should not have problems getting accepted as long as my surgeons office follows their guidelines. 

I go in on the 21st of Feb. for my consult with Dr. Voelinger to see where to go next. 

So in the beginning, I am just like everyone else.. looking for a more fulfilling, happy life in half the body I have now!