It's working

Dec 15, 2009

My therapist talked to me about changing the way I rate me days.  Example: if I binge bad day, If I don't binge good day is the way I used to think about it.  Well she suggested that I consider a binge normal day.  So no matter what, binge is the starting scale for the day.  Then I rate the day based on the amount of binge.  Little, Big.  By giving my self the permission to binge and by changing my thinking from good to bad I have lessened the amount of binging going on.  The power of the binge has been removed.  Do I still binge? yes but it is less amounts of food and fewer days during the week.  I feel like I'm regaining my power.

I'm also working on just plain being kinder to myself.  Loving my body right where it is.  Would I like to loose more? of course.  But if I take the focus off the weight loss and more on the health gain and just being happy right where I am it's much less stressful.  I'm increasing my exercise, I'm finding other things to do than eat, I'm starting to take care of my needs in a different way.  What a powerful feeling this is.

I feel like I'm back on track again.  This time baby steps and progress will be made.  I may slip up even again but I now know it will be a little easier to find my way back.  I'm so glad I reached out for help and didn't just wait until it was too late.

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