Ambelina
Setback? Or an opportunity?
May 13, 2011
Last few months have been odd off and on for my restriction. I could make a bunch as guesses as to why... hormones? Allergies with sinus issues? Who knows?
Confession time: It has come to a head over the last week. I really have hardly been able to eat. It's been a challenge to get the 800 calories/day in much less anything else. Over the last week or so, I've resorted back to protein shakes cuz I was worried about not getting enough protein in. And water? Haven't even been able to drink 20 to 40 oz, much less the necessary 60oz. What is going on?
Then heartburn kicks in. And odd coughing at night. My doctor always asked me at my f/ups in the first year if I had heartburn, reflux, coughing. I always thought they were odd questions. When it started happening, I chalked it up to other reasons. The last few nights a higher power pretty much had to hit me upside the head so that I would get my (shrinking) butt into the doctors. I called them first thing this morning. The last few nights I've had weird coughs/breathing issues where a chunk of food (gross!) comes flying up. It's a tiny little piece & wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that 1) it should not be happening, and 2) it's happening while I'm in a solid sleep pattern so I wake up choking/coughing and trying to get my breathing back under control. It continues on to occur 3 to 4 times a night.
Hubby is out of town & I have never taught our dog how to dial 911 on the phone. We're coming up on a weekend, and Dr Nair's words keep popping into my head. Time to start listening. His nurse, Debbie, got me in right away. She'd spoken with my doctor and let me know they wanted to take out 1.5 cc's.
Why does this make me want to cry? It shouldn't. I am so lucky to have a lap band so that I can get adjustments when things are going well. Isn't that one of the reasons I decided on this procedure rather than the others? . So I am too attached to my saline solution & it's time to let go a little.
Ultimate results? It's been two hours since they took out the 1.5 cc. I was able to eat half of a small salad with chicken in it (most I've had a one time in 4 or 5 weeks) - had no "stop signs" but recognized that I was no longer hungry; waited a half hour and have just finished 16 oz of water.
Will hunger hit soon? What will I do to handle it? They want me to take 10mg pepcid morning & night for a few weeks. They also ordered an upper GI - just to make sure my lap band is happy & healthy. She said they'd be ordering it in a few months as a normal f/up anyhow.
And one other thing? I'm now down to 186lbs. They whole office staff was so excited when I walked in there this morning. I've always had my own goal of 165 in my head. Debbie encouraged me to rethink this goal. I see the changes in my neck & my face - but my mind still pictures the rest of my body the way it used to be. A coworker says we should have "twirly-skirt Tuesdays" (broomskirts are coming back). I thought about picking one up at ColdWater Creek or making one, but then I pictured my body in one. But what I pictured was my old body. How do I get around this?
I'm pretty confused right now & wish I had someone to talk to. So I thought I'd write it all out.
