Wow…time sure does fly when you’re having fun!!

   I can’t believe a yr has gone by already! I’m not only celebrating my surgiversary on 3/2…but I’m celebrating my actual birthday on 3/20 & will be turning 44 yrs young! I am finally LIVING my life…not just existing!  

  I started this journey at my highest wt of 404 in Nov 08 when I first met Dr. Boe. I am now 244 & have lost 160 lbs, 94 total overall body inches, & am presently wearing a size 18 from a womens 36. I have put together a little book of my monthly pictures from pre op to 1 yr showing front, side & face views. My personal goal is 190 or a size 10-12 but I have realized that this is not a race to the finish. It is not about the number on the scale…it is about feeling healthy, strong & getting fit!  This journey is a lifelong commitment  to my health & happiness!

   This was by no means the easy way to lose wt. As we all know, the choices we make every single day still influence our wt loss or gain, our mental health & overall well being. In my opinion, this is when we really rely on those people closest to us in our lives including our Barix family.

   I want to take a minute to give a personal Thank You to my son Adam who so patiently took my pictures every month & has actually survived living with me this past year;  to my sister JoAnn who is my best friend & confidant & who has supported me every step of the way; & my 2 best friends Cathy & Bill who have never judged me & always accepted & loved me even at my heaviest weight!  Words cannot express the gratitude & love I have for each of you!! You have all seen me at my best & my worst & have always stood right there beside me offering support, guidance, encouragement & unconditional love . For all this & more…I thank you!!

   I also want to say thank you to all my friends here at Barix and all my facebook & OH friends. Your support & advice has made such an impact on my life & have made this journey much less challenging!

    I have to say…for the first time in my life…I truly feel happy to be alive… Losing this wt has opened up my life…it has GIVEN me a life! I have a new found confidence in myself & I can finally say I feel beautiful, sexy & content!!  I am doing what I want to do, when I want to do it & I don’t feel the least bit guilty! Like many of you…I am a people pleaser & have always put everyone’s needs & wants ahead of my own…but since surgery…I have learned to put myself first & make myself happy! By being happy with myself…I believe this will create a happy & peaceful environment for everyone around me.

    When I think back on the restrictions I experienced at 404 lbs…I feel truly blessed with my wt loss to date! Regarding food…I can now say that I eat to live…not live to eat! I feel in control of my life & do not feel that food is controlling me anymore!

   I have realized that it's the little things that have meant the most to me! For example...being able to wear a seat belt without an extender, sit in an airplane or movie seat without putting up the arm rest, bending over in my car to release the trunk or gas button without actually having to get out of the car,  sit in the drivers seat without my stomach pressed against the steering wheel, walk up/down the stairs “normally” without taking one step at a time, shopping at the mall without sitting on the bench every 5 minutes, dancing the night away without getting tired or having my legs ache & having the option to sit in a booth at a restaurant. The first time I sat in a booth, I was with my friend Cathy & I just about broke down & cried! People around us must have thought I had won the lottery because I was so happy!  Doing all these activities have brought me such joy this past yr & makes me thankful for my "new & much improved life"!!

   Also, I am so happy to say that I have recently met someone special about 7 wks ago! He is a great guy who makes me feel absolutely beautiful & wonderful in all ways. After being alone for over 15 yrs, I am finally able to open myself up to giving & receiving love! I am finally able to say that I am blissfully happy!! What an amazing journey this has been for me & the best decision I could have made for myself!   Here’s to the next 44 plus yrs!! I'm going to just hang on & enjoy the ride!!! Thank you!