Will May 17th ever get here? Random thoughts

Apr 18, 2010

Lately all I can talk about or think about is my date of surgery and how much my life is going to change.  I'm scared because of my relationship with food but I'm also ready for a new life, a new me.  This weekend I did housework--got one of those cool steam mops.  Anyway, after steaming the floors I started to feel pain my back, legs and calves.  It's no wonder that my house doesn't look anything like I want it to...I don't have the capability right now.  Another one of the reasons why I can't wait to have surgery.  My Mom tells me that I'm driving her crazy because my surgery is all I talk about.  My Mom is my best friend so she hears it daily, sometimes twice a day and don't forget those random calls I make whenever I have something I deem important to tell her.  No, I am not really a "Momma's girl" but something strange happens to you once you have children of your own.  I makes you appreciate your own mother even more.  My Mom has had weight loss surgery-the lap-band so she is also good about giving advice even though I have opted to get the sleeve.  At first she told me that the sleeve is so "radical" and "permanent" but honestly any weight loss surgery is supposed to be permanent even if you have the lap band.  You don't get a band and say "oh, I am going to keep it for 3 years and then take it out".  No, you go in with the goal being to keep the weight off forever.  I don't have the time nor the patience to have a lap band. 
My two little boys were asking about being in my tummy before they were born.  My kids are 3 and 5.  My oldest asked me if I had a baby in my belly now and when I told him no he said "but it just looks like it".  Out of the mouths of babes.  
On another note I'm still trying to quit smoking before my surgery and it's not going so well which is majorly discouraging.  Why did I start smoking at 17?!  If I only knew then what I know now but isn't that the way it goes with everything?  I was reading some of the reviews of the hospital where I'm having my surgery.  Some weren't so great so I'm hoping that they have improved a lot before I get there next month.  

0 Comments