bfmanning
Journey onward to surgery next Wednesday!
Apr 17, 2009
I was so whipped that I stayed off work yesterday. I tried to rest, but didn't really get as much rest as I would have liked. But I did lounge around all day, and that was at least a little help.
I did a healing session last night and uncovered some stuff that I had not ever before. Everything happens in the right timing...God's timing. I hope it will open some energy for me. I believe that it will!
I am still running on low today, but not as much as I was. I think this pre-op diet is part of the energy lock I've got going on. I am doing two protein shakes a day and one lean/green meal. I am probably not even getting 800 calories in a day. I have never in my life done such a restricted diet. But this is what the surgeon asked of me to help shrink my liver so that surgery will be easier. It is very hard to eat almost zero carbs and only 800 calories a day. I have lost some weight, which is good, but I think this is partly why I am so whooped! But if this will help the surgery be less dangerous, then I'm willing to do this. I will have to face this low calories stuff from now on out after surgery, too, so I better get used to it!
I have a bunch of stuff still to do before surgery next Wednesday. I've got all my "getting stuff into the house" things done so that I don't have to send people on errands, (hopefully), or drive myself to run errands I won't feel like I can do.
I have a friend's birthday brunch at the M Resort, a brand new hotel/casino/buffet in Las Vegas, tomorrow morning--should be great fun to make a buffet my one and only lean-green meal! But I am sure I will find stuff that will let me do that. It just won't be very damn much fun! If I could have managed my eating this way all along, I wouldn't need to be having weight loss surgery now, so I know I am on the right path for me, because this is really hard with food right now!--and I have needed to be eating this way ALL ALONG!!!
I have a group meditation at my house Sunday morning, followed by a dinner I planned with my kids where originally I was going to tell my kids about the surgery at this time...but I already told them all. I still want to spend the time with them, though. This has now ended up including my Dad and my brothers because there is no other time to get my Dad from his group home and spend some time with him before this surgery. I want to see him and my family before surgery!
I have NOT told my Dad about the surgery, and I do not plan to until I am mended and navigating back on my feet again. At 84, and since his recent stroke event, he just worries and frets so badly that it would make it so miserable for him and in turn, miserable for me if I tell him before I actually do the surgery. Waiting will be easier on us both, I hope and pray! I need something to be easier SOMEWHERE!
Monday I work and then have a massage after work. I won't be able to do any massages for God only knows how long after the surgery...and they help all the Fibromyalgia pain so much...I just need one more to fortify me before the surgery!
Tuesday I work and get the last of things set in a holding pattern so I can be off for a couple of weeks. Then I have one more healing session right after work--this is the night before the surgery--all these are helping me in getting ready for the surgery. And they help so very much! Then my healer/spiritual advisor/friend will go with me to the hospital and help me stay in a meditative and peaceful state before and going into the surgery. This is always a great help to me whenever I have had to have surgeries in the last 10 years! I am so very grateful for her in my life!!
Then I am off on the weight loss surgery adventure. I plan on having a do-able journey! I hope this is God's plan, too!!!!!
But...I could sure use a long nap right this minute!
