Breathin4him

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Just sitting here reliving some issues from the past.  Just a few moments ago, I enjoyed the fact that I could curl my legs up into the recliner.  Isn't it wonderful to be able to cross your legs, scratch your back, sit in a movie theater in (one) seat, walk with out a fear of someone staring at you and snickering?

I never really acknowledged how much those things bothered me before I had lost the weight.  I was happy and content with who I was and what I looked like at 250 lbs as well.  I had learned to love me no matter what.  It never was about my appearance.

Matter of fact, I think I'm more concerned with my appearance now than I was 9 months ago.

But the one thing I am enjoying is that when I get a pain in my chest, I don't automatically fear the onset of a heartattack.  I no longer have to live in fear of that nightly insulin shot in my stomach.  I no longer have to fear the scales.  I no longer have to wear a size 24 pants and triple X shirts.  I no longer have to wear the Mammoth size bras.  I can wear frills and lace if I desire.

I can look hot if I want too or I can look just as good as a bum in sweat pants and an old baggy t-shirt.

I am really liking ME!  And that is so neat.

I have an "I don't give a rat's butt" attitude at the moment.  I'm sitting here right now trying to figure out how I can indulge in something no healthy for me.  Any ideas?