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July 17, 2006  I have been reading several members profiles and I would like to say that they are very informative. One lady went into great detail regarding the Psych test and other things that have helped me considerably. I did look on line regarding the Lapband and because of all the problems and the fact that I do not want something foreign in my body, I am opting for the Lap RYN. I will be seeing the Doctor next Tuesday, to discuss further. I am excited because I am doing this for me. Not sure if my honey wants me to do this, but it is about my life and my health. I want to take care of me. Why wait when you can do something important now. I give myself to many, now it is time for me.

July 25, 2006  met with Dr. Sonnanstine on a one on one basis to see if this indeed was the avenue I should or should not take. When I arrived I filled out the required paperwork and paid my copayment. Then I was taken into a room for my vitals, weight, blood pressure, etc. The nurse took a picture of me to add to my files so that the staff could get to know my face as well as my name. She went and got me a bottle water and took special care of me. She ask many questions and then I sat down with Dr. Sonnanstine in his private office. I went alone because my husband does not understand this procedure yet. We discussed what my BMI was, he said it is exactly 40.1. He said that I would be an ideal candidate with little or no problems. It is usually ones with higher BMI's that are his biggest challenges. He said that Lap RYN would be best and I agreed. He said that if some time during the surgery he may have to do it open, but that was only a precaution not a given. Because each person is different; he would not be sure until he got in there to look around. But he felt that it would not be a problem. But he wanted to be upfront with any complications at the outset. I did ask about the use of blood and he replied that very little if any was used. I stated that I was one of Jehovah's Witnesses and that I would not accept any blood no matter what. He said, "even if it meant your life?" and I said, "yes, even if it meant my life!!" He stated that he has done the procedure on many of Jehovah's Witnesses without using any blood, and again he did not think it would be an issue.    He said if I have LAP RYN I would lose, (estimated) around 60% to 80% of my weight. I would be an ideal candidate for the surgery if this is what I really want.   After he explained everything that he would do and answered all of my questions, I said "what is next?" He said to start the program, I would have to pay at least half of the program fee of $600 and we could get the ball rolling. So I shook his hand and thanked him and went to the front desk. They said they needed the money upfront, before appointments could be made. I said I would be back on Friday, July 28, 2006 to pay and start the process. All and all, everyone was friendly and helpful and seemed to be very dedicated to their jobs. I am thrilled that I am going to have the WLS and I feel that I have chosen the right group of poeple to help me. The next day I called the office and gave them my credit card number and the appointments were started. Very fast and efficiently.

July 26, 2006 I called the office with my credit card number and paid the first half of the enrollment fee and then they set me up with the first 2 of my appointments. One will be on August 2, 2006 to attend a Nutrition class with others. The next one is on August 3, 2006 to speak with the Psych. Then after I got home I got a call from St. Luke West scheduling my ultra sound for my gall bladder on August 4, 2006. Wow the ball is in motion.

August 2, 2006  I went to the Nutrition class, very nice and informative. A lot of things to take into account. There were 10 of us in the class and all of us are tired of being overweight and willing to make a difference.

August 3, 2006  had a meeting with the Pysch. Before I went in I was weighed and the nurse stated that I had lost 7 lbs. I don't think the scale was right, because I weighed the same when I came in on July to meet with the Dr. But the Pysch. was very nice and ask me many questions. Before going in I had to fill out a paper by filling in a bunch of checks next to items that pertained to me. Then when I sat on her couch, we discussed the items I checked. She was very informative. She said I seem to be a confident person, that did not have any sucidal tendacies, or a history of eating disorders. The whole meeting took about an hour and then she said I was a good candidate both physically and mentally. It looks like I can continue the rest of the procedures with a green light.  The Psych did tell me that between 6 to 8 weeks ones go through a depression period after the WLS and she wants to see me around that time to see how I am doing mentally. Cool beans!!

August 4, 2006 I had an ultrasound of my gall bladder. I went into the office at 7:50 a.m. and left at 8:15 a.m. I didnt even have to remove my clothes, just pull up my blouse and the tech ran a sensor over my stomach. It didnt even hurt. It was over before I knew it. When I was leaving she said that the doctor would have an answer of how it went by Monday, August 7, 2006. I got a bill and my part for this part of the procedure was $57.00. Not too bad since I have to pay 20% of any bill.

August 8, 2006   called Dr. Sonnanstine's office to tell them that I finished the first two appointments and ask what is next? The nurse said that now I have to set up a meeting with a one on one with the nut, which we made for Aug. 16, 2006. Then on Monday, Aug 14, 2006 I have an appointment, first with the sleep management office and then the same day, between 5 p.m. and 6:30 another Nutrition class. The nutritution class is for the next 4 Mondays from 5 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. I am looking forward to all of the information to make me a good loser. I ask the front office at Dr. Sonnanstine's if I was going to get the surgery by the end of the year and she assured me that, "yes" I would probably have it late Sept or early Oct. The paperwork has been forward to UnitedHealthcare. So I guess I am just waiting for a date? I will see how I do on the sleep test and fill everyone in later.

August 11, 2006  I have decided if and when I have the WLS that I will not tell others about the surgery. I hate nosey people and I hate talking about myself. Well, not to everyone on the board. The reason I am writing on this site is to share with others my experiences so that they have an idea of what is happening. But I am going to stick to my privacy and not share all of my business to those that do not need to know. Some may or may not agree, I am not doing the surgery for others it is for me, myself and I. Others did not need to know what was going on in my life, when I was getting fatter by the day, so they do not need to know when I am losing it either. Just my opinion, opinions are like belly buttons everyone has one, but it doesnt mean anything.

August 14, 2006  I had my appointment with the Sleep Apnea Doc, all went well, suppose to come back tonight at 7:30 to start the study. Should be interesting. At 5:00 went to my Nutrition class, very interesting, we discussed emotional and expectations, before and after surgery, very informative. There was a person there that already had the surgery and had to come and see Dr. Sonnanstine for a revision, evidently some Doc didnt know what he was doing, but Dr. Sonnanstine fixed her. She is still losing and doing a good job. She said she was doing everything backwards, as far as attending the pysch, nut and nutritional classes. She said to be thankful that Dr. Sonnanstine's office offers this wealth of information because she did not have it at the time of her surgery and wished she had. So emotionally there will be ups and downs, before and after. We all are wondering if it will work, how it will help us and most of all to realize it is a tool. Someone mentioned that they were not sure if this would work since none of the other diets did and the Psych had a great reply. 
She said to; suppose that your whole life you were building a house and you did not have any tools except your hands, every time you built that house it would stay up for a while and then over time it would collaspe, and this would happen time after time. 
Then one day someone handed you a hammer, some nails, and treated boards, electric saw, a hand drill, some contractors and then you built your house and it stayed put, it had a good foundation and was able to withstand the weather, etc. It was not easy and took lots of time but you had something to show for your hard work. This is how the WLS is, it is a tool that will help us to maintain our lives and help us to get through what our bodies need and make us healthy and happier. The process would take time, with continual and diligent work from me and others, but in the end it is worth it.
I thought this was a great illustration and helped all of see that WLS could work but we need to do our part as well. It is not a quick fix, but a tool. Ones need to consider that it will take a lot on your own personal part to make it last forever.
Then I went to my sleep study. Okay not a great night, I told the nurse that I had to leave at 4:30 a.m. to get back home so I could get to work the next morning, I had to be at work by 6:30 a.m. So I had to go to bed at 10:00 because they had to have at least 6 hrs for the study. I was not tired, I didn't get to go home and eat, because I had to go to the Nutrition class and it wasn't finished until almost 7pm. Then they hooked me up to an enormous amount of wires, coming out of my head, my eyes, my forehead, behind my ears, on my legs and on my chest. Now I was suppose to sleep?????? Needless to say it was terrible. The bed was hard the room was cold and I could not sleep. But I made it through the night and was glad to go home and get some sleep. She said she woke me up right when I was in the rem cycle. But she did not notice the clock and realized it was after 4 and I had to rush out to get ready for work. I drove home but do not know how, because I was so tired from lack of sleep.  
As soon as I got home I went to bed. I didnt go into work until 10 a.m. I was so tired and on top of that I had to come back on Wednesday for the second part of the sleep test. It took 2 days to get the junk out of my hair, just in time for the next episode.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006, I went to see my Nut and we had a one on one. She was very informative and I ask many questions. One of my main questions was, how can ones have the surgery and right afterwards eat chicken? I saw this on this website and I thought what in the world are they thinking? She told me that many people do not have the same information as Dr. Sonnanstine is giving his patient. We are to be on a liquid diet for the first week, and then a pureed diet the next and then pulverized the following and slowly work our way up to solids. Since the operation is still relatively new, ones are not savy to what a patient should eat afterwards, hence the reason why some fail. She said I ask many good questions and stated that I would be a good candidate for the WLS. I told her the whole family was going to benefit from my WLS. When my mom used to go on Weight Watchers she would not let the family eat "her" food. So, I thought this should be a healthy way of eating for everyone so I want everyone to eat what I eat. I bring in the groceries so they will eat it or not eat anything. We will be healthy. Obesity should stop at home!!!  
Then at 7:30 p.m. I went for the second part of my sleep study testing. That was more painful then the first, because this time they put a mask over my nose and held me hostage all night. I could no longer stand it, so at 3:30 I took off the hose and she came rushing in, "you took off your hose!!", "yes, I could not breathe with it any longer", "do you want to stop the study?" I ask "do I have to come back?", She said, 'No", so I said "yes, lets stop the study". She took all of the wires off of me and I was back home in my bed by 4:00 a.m. with a terrible headache and I took off work. Whew, that is over.

August 17, 2006   I GOT A DATE!!! SEPT. 20, 2006. I go in Sept 12, 2006 for post op admission at 2:00 p.m. at St. Luke. Then on Sept 19, 2006, I see Dr. Sonnanstine for my overall physical at 2:30 p.m. Then my WLS is at 8:00 A.M. on SEPT 20, 2006!!! Yeah HOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! This did not take as long as I thought it would, I still can't believe it is going to happen. Let the time fly to get me in there and back home safe and sound.

August 21, 2006   I went to my second Nutrition Group Class, but because I was late, I have to take it over and then I have to move my surgery date. I can hardly believe that missing 20 mins of a Group Class could cause such a commotion. No one told me that we had a grace period for getting there or else we would have to reschedule. But I will call Taryn and see what can be done. This has bummed me out a little, but good things come to those that wait.

August 22, 2006   I called Dr. Sonnanstine's staff and told them about being late for the class and the receptionist said I would have to reschedule the Group session for another date because it is mandatory to go through all of the classes before surgery. Which is fine with me, but I only missed about 20 mins. of the class and Dr. Little had all the info on the board, so I could read what was spoke about before I got there. So now I am just waiting for Tayrn to call me and let me know what can if anything can be done. I find it hard to believe that 20 mins. would be sufficient in taking time from a scheduled surgery. Dr. Sonnanstine's time is very valuable. I am waiting patiently.

August 23, 2006   I spoke to Tayrn at the Dr.'s office and she stated that I would have to reschedule the Group class and surgery for 1 week. So I reinterated what I said yesterday, that I have already made my arrangements with work, family, friends, time off, etc. So she said she would speak to the Dr and call me back. Within a few minutes she called and my surgery is back on for Sept. 20, 2006. No changes!! I do not have to retake the 20 mins I lost. So I will make sure that I am extra early for the next two Group Classes. Especially, the class next Monday, because Dr. Sonnanstine is going to show us a video of what the surgery entails, so we can get an idea of what is going to happen to us. I will not be late!! I am trying to get my husband and son to attend, so they will see what I am doing. They are still skeptical about the whole procedure. But I am confident that between my faith in Jehovah and the Dr. that all will go smoothly.

August 25, 2006   I have not told my boss yet about the surgery. Trying to figure out how to tell her I am having surgery without letting her know what the surgery is. She is very nosey and has a big mouth. She tells everyone anybody's business, related or not. I do not want to be baraged with her thousand and one questions, just so she can go blab it to the rest of the world. I am really very private, and I am only keeping a journal on this site to help others that are thinking of having the surgery. I do not wish to tell anyone that does not need to know my business about the procedure. I did call my Temp Agency that I was going to have surgery, but did not give them any details. They said to tell them first and they would call my boss. I will call them after I tell my boss, since I have to work with her. Anyway, I am thinking of telling her that I am having problems with my stomach and intestine and that I am going to have exploratory surgery. That should keep down loads of questions. Maybe, NOT!! Well, let me pray about how to handle it and I will let you know how it went. She does know about all of my appointments so at least it will not be a complete surprise. Catch ya'll later.

August 28, 2006  I attend the third Nutrition Group Session and got there in plenty of time. My husband and son attended as well, since Dr. Tom was going to show us the video of the operation today. There were around 30 of us at the meeting.   
Dr. Tom Sonnastine first passed around a tool that he uses to staple the stomach and also showed us a clear see through bottle that held the staples that would be in our stomach. They were very, very tiny, he stated that we would have on average 100 staples inplanted into our new stomach. They are permanent and they would not set off a metal detector, so we would be fine. He was showing two videos, one with a LAP RYN and the other a LAP Band.   
Then the video began, the first video was a LAP RYN on a female with a BMI of 51, he showed us everything, the surgery room, his assistants, the Antheosilogist, where he stands during the operation. It was great, he started our by drilling thru the belly button, going thru layers of skin and fat. Lots of fat, until we could see the inside of the stomach wall, he made an opening for the tool that moves and holds back the liver, which lies on top of the stomach and esphoghus, spelling?? The tool looks like a huge hook. He makes sure that he does not touch the spleen, that would be dangerous. Then you see his finger finding where is the best place to insert the next instrument, after that instrument comes thru you see his finger poking thru, with a glove on of course. Then this instrument with a ballon is put in this opening. It blows up your insides so he can see better. Everything was magnified and looked huge, but was very, very small. He sprays some type of liquid to help minimize the pain after the surgery. He stated that not many doctors do this but it helps the patient heal faster if they are not in constant pain.
We see him thru another opening he inserts the staple gun and pulls on the stomach and starts to surgically cut, then at the same time with the staple gun, staples the stomach part that will be your new pouch, it is the size of your thumb. Then the stomach is sealed. Not much blood at all. Then he takes out the balloon and inserts another instrument which just lays on the stomach until it is needed. Then he closes the hole again with the balloon, for the time being. Then he goes places a tournaque inside which he is going to wrap around the intestine. It is blue so that it does not get left behind and mistaken for part of your insides. He does a lot with the small intestine and knows just how to pull on the intestine so that it does not get jumbled up and lays back the same way as he found it. Then you see the staple gun again sear open the intestine and then seals it with the staples. Then he does pulls the small intestine together with that instrument that was just laying there and pulls the two of them together to form your new RYN, it is so cool and intrigue. He does an amazing job. There is more to the surgery then what I stated but I don't remember each detail.
Also he does a lot of sewing of parts, (i.e. small intestine), that other doctors just leave open. The reason he does this is to help with infections, they dont get infected often but it doesnt hurt to be safe. After the stomach and intestine are sealed together, he does a water test to make sure there is no leakage. He has the anthesologist push a tube down the esphoghus and then they test it for air bubbles, if there is no bubbles there are no leaks. Then he pulls off the tornique and pulls it out. That is when he inserts the tube so he can keep an eye on our insides. Great JOB!!  
He stated that he has us eat orange or green jello while we are in the hospital, so that when he checks are tube and sees orange or green coming out, it is a warning that we are in trouble and there is a leak. Isn't that smart of him?? He has done over 650 operations and has had only one leak in that amount of time. He has never lost a patient. His numbers look good. I don't know any other doctors that are that extensive by showing his patientsa video and keeping us informed of what he is going to do, it is amazing!   
Please consider this doctor for your surgery, at least compare him with the others you have read about. It is worth it to find a good surgeron. You want someone that will do his very best every time.

Sept 7, 2006  It is only 2 weeks from my surgery and every day I try to read about someone elses surgery to know what to expect. A doctor can do everything to show us and teach us about the surgery but each person's body is different on how it handles the surgery. So I am trying to keep an open mind and doing very well in the process.   
I told my boss that I was having surgery and would be out of the office at least 3 weeks and just left it at that. I didn't go into great detail, and told her I was having issues with my stomach and small intestine. So, that kept down a lot of questions. Since I did not name what I had it seemed to aleviate my problems as far as her asking private and interigating questions.   
I am getting excited and at the same time anxious. I finally came to the realization that this is okay and I will be just fine. I am in capable hands and if anything happens, Jehovah will help me. I am doing well. My honey does keep asking if this is what I want? He says he is very concern and wants me to be happy. Now that is why we have remained married for over 32 years. He is very attentive and loves me dearly. I love him bunches!!

September 15, 2006   I am catching some type of cold, because my throat is scratch and I am becoming hoarse as I speak. Oh, no I am not getting sick, not right before my surgery? I am only 5 days away from the losing side and now this. A girl at work came in sick on Wednesday with a cold or something drastic and now I bet that I am catching it. This is terrible, now what will I do?

September 16, 2006   Today is Saturday and I have been sick all night. I can hardly breathe and my throat hurts so bad. I have a terrible headache and the room is spinning. I hope that I can still have my surgery on Wednesday, Sept 20, 2006. I will try to medicate myself with all of my cold medicine and go to see my PCP on Monday, since I can not get into his office until then. Man, why am I getting sick, now of all times. Maybe I will be well by Wednesday.

September 17, 2006 Sunday,    no way, I am worse today then I was two days ago. No this is going to hang on, whatever it is that I have. I am totally bummed out. We are going to Red Lobster tonight since my WLS is on Wednesday and this is my last big meal. I can hardly swallow, so I hope this works. I am going to see my PCP first thing on Monday, I will be waiting in his parking lot as soon as his office opens to see what I have and if I need to cancel my surgery. I pray I will be well in time for Wednesday, but right now it doesnt look like it. Bummer!!

September 18, 2006   called my work and told them that my throat was swollen and that I was going to my doctor and would not be in the office today. Great, I wish I was not sick!!! I went into see my PCP and he stated that there was a viral infection going around and I must had caught it. My viral infection will last between 7 to 14 days, to run its course. He gave me some antibotics to help fight infections, because any time I get a cold or congestion, it will rest in my ears and then I have to fight inner ear infections.
I know that I will not be well in time for my surgery and I am fighting with my inner self on whether to tell Dr. Tom that I am sick or just let him find out after the fact. That could mean my death if I go into surgery with an infection, which would be determental to my health. I can not risk my life just because I want to be healthy, that would not make sense. I really want the surgery, but then I have to be in good health to be able to heal. I have to use discernment or else I am just asking for trouble.

September 19, 2006  The night before my surgery. But I have a problem, I had to cancel the operation, I am just too sick!! I had to go to my PCP , and he said I had viral infection. He stated that it was going around and that I would just have to wait it out. I have been coughing and congested since Friday and I could not shake it.  
I decided that I did not want to have my operation with my infection; I was afraid that I would have further complications, and would not heal properly.  
Oh, well time and unforseen occurences befall us all. I did not want to risk any complications, because we all know that this is a very serious operation and everyone should be in good health before surgery. So, reluctantly, I called Dr. Tom's office to tell them that I could not do the operation as planned. I left a message with the Dr.s nurse, because she was not in the office. Tayrn called back and she agreed that I should wait until I get well before going through with the operation. She will call me when I get healthier to set up another date.
That makes me relieved that they are truly concerned about the patient and not about the money that they they would be losing. Believe me, I tried to stay well, but someone in our office came into the office knowing she was sick, last week, and I caught her germs!! I am so upset that she came in sick and the fact that she didn't have any consideration for the rest of us. Especially, when she knew I was having surgery. Some people are so inconsiderate.
Oh well, I will just get better and try to plan for another date. I guess this has happened to others, but why me? Now, my husband wants me to try Weight Watchers again and take my protein shakes and see if that works. Well, he is right, diets work for a while and then I gain back everything I lost, plus gain an extra 10 to 15 lbs more. This happens every time. I know that he is concerned about the seriousness of the operation, but I feel that I must have the WLS because it means my life. I have to get back to living again!! I read every day, a lot of the postings on Obesity Help and ones that have had the surgery are very inspirational. I want to feel good about myself and join the living. I am excited about what the surgery could mean for me.  
I love my husband but this is about me and my health, not his, he is very glad that I canceled the operation. I think he feels that I will not go through with it. I hate to disappoint him, but I will go through with the operation, as soon as I am better.   
Now tomorrow my son and he will be staying home, because I was suppose to be in surgery and now that it is canceled they decided to keep the day and stay home. That's okay, we all deserve a day off once in a while. So we will enjoy the day together.   
I already had my bag packed and got my protein drinks, my pill crusher, my blender, my vitamins, robe, a new suitcase, two new nightgowns, etc. I was ready and excited to be doing something for me. Now it feels as if I was promised a great vacation, but because I got sick I had to stay behind while the rest of group gets to go without me. Now that is terrible.
I didn't mention that even though I was sick, I went to a job interview this morning. Yes, even with my hoarse throat and my fever and chills, I went to see about a real job. I have been working as a temp since Jan of this year. But this was a real job opportunity to work as an Office Manager, instead of a file clerk, when ones don't even think I have a brain. I want a full time job, with benefits and days off, and real vacations with pay. I think I may have gotten the job, but the owner would not tell me until Friday. I don't know how this will play out with my operation, but I know that all things will work out for the best. I am just doing what I can, to make my life better. I will take each day one at a time.

September 20, 2006   the date I was suppose to be on the losing side and here I sit, at home sick with a sore throat and a hacking cough, that seems never to disappear. I really am depressed about not having my operation. But I must be healthy or else I could not heal properly. I have to use good common sense.

Septemper 21, 2006  I feel better today, of course, that is how it always works. It is so crazy. I could have had the operation. Not really, I am still coughing and some junk is breaking up. I hope the end is soon, because this sore throat is the worst I have ever had to deal with. I called the Drs office to see if they could set a new date, but unfortunately, the office closes at 4:30 pm. and I had to leave a message. I want to set up a new date. Hopefully, I will not have to wait too long. We will be patient and wait on Jeohvah.

September 24, 2006   I received a call on Friday from TriState Weight Loss Center stating that they received the phone message I left last night, but since Tayrn will be out of the office unitl Monday she will call me then to set up a new surgery date. I am pleasantly surprised.   
I must admit that I have been awful cranky this week, partly due to having to reschedule and partly due to the suffering I have had to endure from this viral infection. My throat is still hurting and it is very hard to swallow. I am going to consider changing my PCP because he did not give me what I think a doctor should have, from this viral infection. He told me to get some over the counter cold medicine to help with my symptoms. I really thought that he should have at least given me something to break up the congestion. I am sure that his doctor's office should have many free samples to help ones to get over whatever ails a patient. I am really unsatisfied with his skills as a doctor. I want someone that cares that when I am sick, that I do not suffer. This has been the worst viral infection I have ever had to endure. I should not be in pain after a week of suffering. I dont know what to take to get some relief.
By the way, on Saturday I received a bill from my insurance company for an amount around $3000 for the different consultations, Pysch, Nutrition classes, etc. The form stated it was "not a bill," but it gives me an idea of what I have to look forward to paying out of pocket. This bill does not include the operation, itself. I hate to see how much I owe for the whole experience. I noticed that no one has stated how much they have had to pay. I think that this is very important, because face it, no one wants to pay more than anyone else, but it would be nice to be able to compare what one insurance company charges vs. another. Maybe this will inspire others to put a dollar amount to the whole enchalida!! I know that I would like to see what they had to pay out of pocket.

September 25, 2006  Well, good news, just spoke to Dr. Tom's nurse and my surgery has been rescheduled for Wed, Sept 27, 2006 @noon. I have to be at the Hospital's outpatient between 9:30 & 10 a.m. They will have to draw blood and then I should be good to go.    
At first, we set the date for next Monday, Oct 2, 2006 but she called back and stated that my insurance would not be accepting WLS after Oct 2006. So that date will not work, so now I am getting ready for the surgery of a life time. I went to my PCP and got some different meds to get the mucus out of my lungs. I am very grateful. I feel better already. I really what to feel better so I can be on the losing side. So, here we go again and this time I am ready, let's do this. I can't wait to feel better and get my health back, like a normal person. This is great news, I told my husband and he is still questioning my dedication to continue this procedure. I assured him that I am more than ready. Now he has to take off work on Wednesday, but that is okay, we will work it out financially. We just have to be deligent in our pursuit to pay our bills and take care of our responsiblities.      
My weight is down to 231 lbs. I attribute my weight loss to the fact that my throat feels as if it has been swelled shut and it is hard enough to breathe not alone eat.

September 26, 2006    Tomorrow is the day and yet I am not apprehesive or really worried. I know that I am in good hands and that I will be fine. So many, have had this operation and are doing just fine. Even if there are problems I believe that all will go well. I am confident in my surgeon and I always put my trust in Jehovah God. Why should I fear man who can only kill me, when Jehovah can give me the crown of life, no matter what happens. I remain appreciative of all that I have and for my life.
I hope that all that go through this operation will fair well as I know that I will. I would like all to come to the know "The Truth", that will set man free. Jehovah has a great life ahead for all of us, not in heaven, but here on Earth. The prayer we have all learned from our first religious experience, is the Lord's Prayer, we are praying to let thy kingdom, or government, to come on the earth as it already is in heaven. The new government will be run by Jehovah, himself, no longer will man be able to screw up what Jehovah has given man from the very beginning. We are praying to live on the earth forever, as it was meant to be, from the first human pair. Even though they fell short, we are thankful to Jehovah sacrificing his only begotten son, Jesus Christ, to die for all of us, so they we may have life. Not life in heaven but here on Earth!! The Earth will not be destroyed, Jehovah promised that with his rainbow. Man will live forever with promise of never dying.    Our life will be full of peace
But how? Jehovah is great and powerful, the Creator of all things, there is no question that He can and will make this happen. Believe it or not, Armaggedon, the great war of our God Almighty against the evil, will come very, very, very soon. Which side will you take? You must come to learn about Jehovah and His great promise, that is soon to take place. Don't miss out because you think that your religion is the only correct one!! This is not about religion, Babylon the Great is going to fall, which is the world empire of false religion, this is about doing Jehovah God's will!!
Not your will, or mine, but what Jehovah wants us to do. You have to make a clear decision on how you will answer when He decides who are sheep and who are goats. Ones that are sheep are the ones that follow Jesus and Jehovah's voice and do what God wants them to do. A goat is one that is unworthy because they are stubborn and feel that they know what is best for them. Sheeplike humans follow the great Shepherd, Jesus, and are able to receive the crown of life. Goatlike humans are ones that do not listen. They are following their god, Satan. Satan is the god of this system, he is changing himself into an angel of light and has mislead so many that they have no hope of living forever.
You have to decide, who you will worship, as for me and my house we shall worship Jehovah our God. You can too, ask any Jehovah's Witness and they will show you how. Remember Noah? He and his family paid attention to Jehovah. Noah listen to Jehovah's voice; he and his family were spared. Jehovah told Noah to warn all of those living, at that time, that a great flood was coming, no one but Noah and his family listen. Only Noah and his family lived. No one hanging on the outside of the ark was saved. Only those inside the ark were spared. Will you be spared?    
I am afraid that ones have heard so many false prophets, i.e. priest, preachers, etc, that they are confused on which teachings are right. You must be deligent about finding out what is right and what is fake, read your Bible and ask any one of Jehovah's Witnesses and they can set you straight. Again, this is not about religion it is about doing Jehovah's will. Don't shrug this off, it means you and your family's lives.
I have to tell everyone or else I could be bloodguilty. If you do not believe at least research it for yourself. It really is the most important decision you could ever make. I pray that all of those that read this will come into the Truth and hopefully will survive the end, (which is only a breathe away). I am not guaranteed that I will survive, but at least I am willing to listen and tell others. This is what Jehovah has promised man and I believe that whatever Jehovah says will come to be. Jehovah can not lie!!!
That said, now I am packing all of my things for this new chapter in my life. I will update my journal on Saturday, when I get home. See ya'll then....

September 29, 2006   Home from the hospital. Boy am I glad! I am still in a little bit of pain. That G tube is a weird sensation coming out. It did not hurt, but now my side is in pain. Dr. Tom said that would be normal. Dr. Tom released me from the hospital around 4:30 pm and I was back home by 5:30pm.     After the surgery, I was mostly thirsty, but no one would give me a drink until day 1. That was terrible. My son even commented later that the nurses did not accomodate my request, but I knew the drill. The nurses gave me a sponge on a stick to wet and to swab the inside of my mouth, it helped but was not the same as getting a cool tall glass of water. My mouth smells terrible and I am in some pain. It was good to finally get something to drink.
I really think that eating is all psychological. I am not hungry but remembering all the good food I used to eat, and all the food commericals makes you think you are missing out. But really I am not missing anything. Dr. Tom allowed me to have clear liquids Friday and they sure did taste good. I look forward to finally chewing food. But I have decided against eating any type of sugar, even sugar substitutes. Sugar is not good for my body and why should I go back to eating what is not good for me?
St. Luke West, is a great hospital if your doctor is Dr. Tom. I had a friend that was in the hospital the same night as I was. She came over to visit me and said that she was in a room across the hall way from mine, she had a hysterocomy. She did not get a private room, so they stuck her with a woman that just had her appendix removed and that poor lady coughed all night. I had to ask my nurses to close my door so I could get some sleep. I ask my nurses if she was okay and they told me she was fine. 
I found out afterwards that my friend stated that the nurses did not give the woman any pain medicine all night. The woman vomited and no one cleaned it up until the next shift came in. My friend was livid. She had to speak to the head nurse and tell them that she wanted to be transfered to a different hospital. She was in the bed farthest from the bathroom and had to pass the lady's family, whenever she had to use the bathroom. My friend told the head nurse that she had more dignity than that and would rather have a potty chair placed by her bed then to have to stagger to the bathroom in front of strangers in her nightgown.
Then my friend found out that the lady had brochnitis on top of being sick and that is contagious. She did not want to catch anything while trying to heal.   
St. Luke West hospital staff finally decide to move my friend to a private room, but we both still heard the "appendix lady" coughing through the next night without any relief. I blame her nurses for not having the courage to ask for meds for the poor woman. Also, I blame her doctor for being so inconsiderate to their patient. The physician should have given the nurses orders for medicines, just in case there were problems. We should never be treated like we do not matter as this woman was. When we are sick we are very vulnerable. So I do not support anyone going to this hospital unless their doctor is Dr. Sonnanstine. Make sure you research your surgeon in all surgeries that that you and your family may need. Not all doctors care about their patients, so make sure you do your part on picking the right doctor for all procedures. Some of us spend more time picking the right fruit to eat, then picking the right physician for a very important surgery.

October 1, 2006   Last night was not very good. It was hard to fall asleep, lots of pain. Then I finally went to bed around 2 a.m. I was sleeping very well, when I decided to change my position, wrong move!! I could not find a comfortable place for the soreness in my stomach, where the G tube was removed. So I went downstairs to the family room and slept in the recliner, that didn't work, so I tried the couch, that helped for a little bit, but I was very tired and wore out when I finally decided to move back to the recliner. My honey brought me some coffee this morning as soon as I awoke, he added some sugar free creamer, it was good. Then I took a shower. I made myself a protein shake which really surprised me by tasting so good. I bought 2 cartons of Unjury, one vanilla and one unflavored. Plus several office paks to take to work with me. I do want to make sure that the glasses I add the protein shake are cold, so I put a few glasses in the freezer for my next meal. I feel much better and took my Flintstone sugar free vitamin and am sitting up.   I ate my regular protein as needed and had my snacks, but I still feel awful. I have to give my body sometime to heal. I will just rest, I know that I will be okay, because I am in good hands.

October 3, 2006  Boy, am I extra tired!! I feel that as soon as I stand up, that if someone just hit me with a feather and I will fall over. I hope that this is normal. I still can not sleep. I mean that I can not sleep even after going to bed at 2 a.m., I can not stay asleep. I am in pain.   
I got a call from Dr. Tom's nurse yesterday and she said I had major surgery and it would take a while to get back to myself. I am under no restrictions, so she encouraged me to get outside and get some air and walk. I would if I could stand up. So, I have plan, I will start by standing every hour for at least 5 mins. Hopefully energy will begat more energy. I can not stay down forever, so I will make myself better.
My boss called me at the house, last night around 9 p.m. and she wanted to know how the surgery went. I told her just fine. I did not tell her that I had WLS. Not to be untruthful, but I did not tell her exactly what I had done. She is only my employer, not Jehovah, and sometimes people do not need to know what I am doing. She is the one that likes to talk about people and I dont need the whole world to know my private business. I told her that I have an appointment with my Doctor, next Friday, Oct 13, 2006 to see if I can be released to work. I will call her then with my update, hopefully she won't call again. I have to get on my feet to start helping my honey bring in the money for bills. I am just as responsible as he is and must do my part. He wants me to rest and I want to get well.

October 6, 2006  Yeah, home a whole week post op. I feel much better but still fatigue. But on the whole I feel much better. I was watching TV late one night while I was laying on the couch and out of the blue I coughed. OMG!!! I thought I busted all of my stiches!! It hurt as if someone had punched me as hard as they could in my side. It took a while to recover from the pain. Now my left side hurts like crazy. I called the doctor office and they said it was the same place that the surgery took place.
They said that I would be okay, that I would have to do something terrible like being in a car accident or something drastic as that, in order to bust my stitches. So I am okay, just feeling sore.
Food, food, food it is all so mind boggling. I have to learn to have a dfferent relationship with this substance. I love to watch the Food Network. I am not hungry, but I have this weird fascination with food. I love to watch people make food, talk about food and eat food. I don't know if it is a side effect of having the WLS. But I am thinking I must have a screw loose. Hahahahahaaa!!!
I am not hungry, I am only 9 days Post Op, and I am on a full liquid diet. I dont really enjoy my protein shakes, (mine are from unjury, they taste way too sweet) but I make sure I drink them as I am suppose to. I love to smell the food my husband cooks for supper, but I do not crave eating the food. I really have found out a lot about food and it makes me wonder what I have been eating. There are so many different types of good food out there. I am not speaking about fast food, or every day food, I am speaking about different authenic foods, foods around the world, different ways to make food. We limit ourselves so much from eating the same thing day in and day out. We really need to expand our horizons on how and what we eat. This is a new realization for me. Will it last? Will I continue to feel this way about food? Is it like an alcoholic looking for another drink knowing that he cant have it or should not have it? I dont know I will explore this new thought and see where it takes me.

 GOAL : between 155 and 175 lbs. October 18, 2006   I went to the Dr. for my checkup on Friday, Oct 13, 2006.  He stated that I was doing fine that I had lost 19lbs.  He said that I should be losing a pound a day for the first month and then 1/2 lb daily for the next month or so.  I would have plateaus but that would be due to my body adjusting to the new me.  I told him that my left side hurt where he did most of the Lap surgery and he said it would be tender for at least 6 months but that was normal.  I am to go ahead and start on my pureed foods for 7 days and then start eating soft foods until I see him at the end of Oct.  I asked if I could go back to work for 1/2 days and he said if I felt like it.  It was up to me.  He said I was doing fine.  My vitals were fine, my issue with my blood pressure was only while I was in the hospital, he said my blood pressure was better than his.  I told him I felt guilty about having the surgery and maybe I should have not had it and he replied, that everyone says the same thing.  In a couple months, I will have a different attitude once I start seeing the signifcant weight lose.    He told me I had no restrictions and that he wanted me to start walking at a good pace to the point of working up a sweat.  The more I exercise the better I will feel.   I ask him if I could get a flu shot and he said, "yes".  I shook his hand and went to the front desk and received my release for work.  The staff stated that if I changed my mind about going back to work on Monday to call them and they would issue me a new release for when I thought it felt right to go back to work.    I really am very tired. Is it my age or is it the surgery?  I told the Dr. that I could not get to sleep until 2 a.m. and he said he did not know why that is, but all of his patients say the same thing.  He suggested that I take a half of a Benetryal, it has no side affects and should help me get to sleep.  I went back to work on Monday, Oct 16 and worked from 11:30 to 3:30, I was pooped. I thought I would never make it home.  I made supper and ate some roast with peas and carrots that I pureed in a food processor.  It taste great, but then I got  nausea and had to lay down.  The next day I could not go to work, I just did not feel up to it.  I called the office and told them that I would not be in.  I really am upset with my job, I am a temp and they decided to hire someone on the outside for a position I was qualified for.  My boss told me the last time she hired someone that she would consider me for the next position, after all it is the same job I am doing.  I dont understand.  Then there was this other job where I work that I applied for and they hired another person instead of me and the job that I went to see while I was sick, hired someone else.  So now my self esteem is out the window.  Is it me?  the way I look?  I have the qualifications, but no one wants to hire me.  I need a full time job and it doesnt seem like I will get one any time soon.  I went to my temp agency right after visiting my doctor, because she said that she would get me something new.  But when I ask her what she had, her reply was that they had another job paying a dollar less then what I was making and that it was a customer service postion.  I decided to pass and thanked her and left.  People are not what they seem, they tell you one thing and then do the opposite.   By the way, Jehovah's Witnesses have a new campaign out this month.  It is vital to everyone.  It is to let ones know that we are living in the pre-flood days.  Which means that Jehovah is gearing up for Armaggedon. The day of the great war between good and evil.  The new tract, "The End of False Religion is Near" is one of the most important messages we have spread to the population.  All of the information is in the  track letting ones know what the Bible says about False religion falling.   It is very, very soon.      What is false religion, the Bible says that any religion that tells their members to fight in wars against their fellow men, where clergy men pray to win the battle over any other's brother, when false religion says that gay marriages and pre married sex is okay, when religion says it is okay to appoint clergy that are homosexuals to preside over a congregation, false religion is religion that tells their members that false doctrine is okay, i.e. teaching of soul leaves the body and goes to heaven or hell, or when the churches ask family  members to give them money to help a love one to get out of pregatory, which there is none.  Ezekiel 18:4 states that the soul that is sinning itself will die.  Ecclesiastes 9:5 states that the living are conscious that they will die, but as for the dead they are conscious of nothing at all. Jesus taught that dead will be resurrrected, John 11:11-25, this would not be necessary if humans had an immortal soul.  Does your religion teach that the soul does not die? If so, get out of her now, it means your life.  If your religion is doing any of these things get out, read your Bible find out the Truth.  We have all been suckered forever regarding what the Bible really says.  Even Christmas, when the 3 wise men came to visit Jesus in the manger.  The Bible says in the book of Matthew Chapter 2 that the wise men were astrologers, that were told by King Herod to find the boy and then report back to him, so he could destroy him.  The astrologers followed a star, placed by Satan, to find Jesus. But when they arrived they did not find Jesus in a manger, Jesus was a little boy by the time they showed up.  The astrologers gave presents to Jesus but when they went to leave they were told by an angel of God to not return to King Herod to tell him where they found Jesus, because the King wanted to kill Jesus.  See just that little bit of information has been a lie to all of us for centuries. 
We have to read for ourselves what the Truth is.  Do you want to die because someone has told you false lies?   I do not and best of all Jehovah does not want anyone to die.   That is why He has told us to preach the message and help ones to get out of false religion and live.   Live where?   Here on the Earth in a paradise condition.  Sounds corny?   Not if you read your Bible, the whole theme of the Bible is to live forever, but not how we are today.    Ask a Jehovah's Witness and they will get you onto the path of true salvation.   It does not cost a thing to ask, but it does mean your life if you don't......

November 5, 2006   I have been to see my Nutritionalist and she has reminded me to make sure that Protein comes first in all of my meals.  I had forgot that part. It doesnt matter how much you eat, (your body will tell you when to quit eating) just make sure protein is the first thing that should go into your mouth at every meal and snack.   Turkey bacon, cottage cheese, yogurt without the fruit, (but you can add your own fruit), peanut butter, eggs, egg beaters, omelets, meat, cheese, etc.  There are a wealth of high protein items that should be incorporated into your meals daily.  She took me off of the protein shakes, because I am getting plenty of protein in my diet.    I now weight 215 lbs, lost another 4 lbs.  Yeah for me!  I did tell my Nut that I am not worried about my weight, I did this not to lose weight but to feel better, healthier.  This is for me.  She was glad that I was not so concern about the weight aspect.  We are getting too involved in the scale that we should remember that we are trying to live after WLS.  Getting wrapped up in what the scale says is not going to make us healthier.  It is important to get into our heads what has caused the obesity. There is a reason we are obese people.  We must get to the root of the problem, what is my problem?  I am still learning what is causing me to be obese.  It is a journey that I am on and along the way I hope that the answer will be made known to me soon.  I want to be happy about the way I look and feel.  I do hope that I am on the right track.  I lost my job about 2 wks ago, due to "agressively looking" for another position.  The reason I was looking for a new position, was that as soon as I show up for work, (my firs day back), my boss tells me that she had hired someone on the outside for a position that she promised me. Her reason, she said, "she was not sure when I would be back so she had to get someone in a hurry".   What a crock, she knew exactly when I was coming back, didn't she just call me at the house a week before to see when I was going to return?  Worldly people are just so back biting, you can never trust them.    So I ask my boss after she tells me about this new revelation, "where do I stand in this equation"?  She says that to tell me the truth, since I had this surgery, I missed too much work, so she could not hire me, because she could not count on me.  What is she talking about?  I have been temping for this company for the past nine months, I have come in early, stayed late, worked weekends and usually worked a 55 to 60 hour week.  I actually worked more hours a week then those that are full time workers.     Before the surgery I was never late or missed work, even though I am a temporay worker.  Why does she now need to see if I will miss work after the surgery?  Which does not even make sense.  Why would I miss work after the surgery?  I am now well enough to be here all the time.  I knew that she was not telling me the truth.  So I decided to start my pursuit of finding a job either elsewhere within the company or at another location.  I started making phone calls, networking, sending out my resume, emailing people, all the things one does to find a job.   So I worked all week, half days, even while I was still sick and then I go home on Friday, all is well.   I get a call Saturday afternoon on my cell phone, from my temp service, to say that my services are no longer needed.  I am told that my boss said that I was agressively looking for another job and she was not happy about it. The temp service told me that I was not allowed to speak with anyone from the company.   She said that she would talk to me on Monday, when she picked up my personal items from the old job.   As my temp recruiter was speaking to me about ending this assignment, she was getting very irate with me, as if I had did the ultimate sin.  I was getting annoyed by her acqusations.  She was telling me everything that my boss had said, some of which were not true, and I was very upset, because she had taken whatever that person had said without asking me about what had happened.  So I told her to wait a minute! I did not do anything that was wrong!  My boss and I had a discussion where she stated that she would not hire me at this time and that it would be a least two months before she would even consider in asking if she could get approval for, and even if she was to get approval for  my position she would not hire me right away.  She would have to wait at the very miminum of two months before offering the position to me!! She had to be sure that my attendance would not be an issue.  What is she talking about?  I have proved myself before the surgery, by working a 55 to 60 hr work week!!  She is just pushing her w