Cakes
When I was in my teens, I believed I was fat and when I look back and see me at size 10-12, I am horrified that I did not see myself . I have since learned that one of my issues is seeing myself the way I am. I increasingly gained weight from 26 years and older. The turning point for me was March 2009, I had quit smoking, but I had an upper respiratory infection with pneumonia. For six weeks I was on steroids. Well, by May, I had gained almost 35 pounds and had the moon face to go with the weight gain. I ould hardly walk 20 feet without being out of breath. I walked like a cross between a pregnant woman and a football player. My legs and ankles swelled stretching the skin unmercifully. I had asthma, edema, history of "TIA" strokes, high blood pressure and social anxiety.
I tell you that one day I looked in the mirror - I mean really looked and cried uncontrollably when I saw that moon face. I went on line and researched WLS. I filled out the paperwork then and there. When I went for first appointment, I was not waivering. I knew what I wanted and needed to do. That was June 09, I had surgery on my birthday, October 7, 2009. I gained ten pounds two weeks before surgery; and tried to tell the doctor it was water weight. Surgery weight was 28 pounds loss. Total weight loss as of November 12 is 50 pounds. My major issue, again is how I see myself. So I take frequent pictures. When I was younger, I always had guys after me. Now please don't think me stupid, but I never understood that they found me attractive. Food became my balm for everything. My challenge now is to learn to love me completely, to see myself as I truly am - physically and emotionally; to not use food as a balm; to continue to improve my health, and to let others love me. The day after I woke up from surgery things seemed so bright and I felt alive for the first time in memory. Thank you God, and thank you Dr. Chapman.
