Feb 06, 2020
Hi Everyone...it's been a very long time since I last posted. Not even sure why I thought of updating, but here I am.
It's been 19 years since my gastric bypass and there have been tremendous ups and downs. It's a surgery that can be life-altering in a good and bad way. Initially after I lost 100lbs I remember becoming very depressed and couldn't understand why. I was looking better than I ever had but in hindsight realized that I missed my best friend...food. Without realizing it, I made an addiction transfer from food to alcohol, which was something I had always avoided before. This led me into a very quick spiral into alcoholism. Alcoholism is an epidemic among post gastric bypass patients that is often overlooked. Over the years of recovery in AA and Celebrate Recovery, I met many men and women who had also transferred their food addiction to alcohol. It shattered my life. At this time I also started to date for the first time and remember being so desperate to get married due to the chronic loneliness I had felt for so many years that I picked a horrible man just so I could get married. We were only married two years but the devastation of this relationship and the alcoholism were so devastating that I have literally been picking up the pieces of my life ever since. I cannot begin to tell you all how important post gastric bypass counseling would have been for me.
The medical community has it backwards. They want to counsel and educate us before we have the surgery but require zero counseling on the post side of the surgery. They spend all their time trying to teach us to eat right but forget that the majority of overweight people are professional dieters. We know exactly how to eat but have been unable to implement it into our lives. And post surgery for many of us lifetime overweight people is a completely new world. I had never dated anyone before the surgery and all of a sudden men were showing me interest and it terrified me. I also remembering becoming angry that all of a sudden people started noticing me and showing attention. It made me angry that I was still the same person that they would have ignored when I was fat. These feelings along with the depression and addiction transfer played an immense role in my life, post surgery and I wish I would have had more guidance and support during these years.
I have had many years of up and down with my weight since my bypass, but three years ago, I was admitted to the hospital with stage 3 renal failure. I found out that since I had been so bad about taking my vitamins regularly that I had developed malabsorption syndrome which led to the renal failure. It took 16 years for my body to show the damage of not taking the vitamins and the outcome was very serious. Please take your vitamins!!!!
I finally met the man of my dreams last April 2019. We were married just 8 months later in November or 2019 and I have never been happier and felt more complete. However it took me a very long time to find him...13 years after my first terrible marriage. This was on purpose, although I wish it hadn't taken that long. I was determined to get into recovery and work our all the baggage of my life so I would not take it into a new marriage. I did this diligently and would not settle for the wrong guy again. It paid off!!! I never did have children and learned that this was ok because I knew that I had waited for the right man that God had for me and I am confident he has incredible plans for my life.
This surgery can be a miracle and devasting at the same time. If you have questions about how to receive help if you are going through any of the trials I have gone through then please email me. I would love to help.