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I was looking at pictures online over the weekend and saw someone who had a "upper body lift" which removed extra skin from the upper abdomen and was so excited!  

I have a roll on my upper tummy that I hate, the LBL that I had last August didn't take care of it and I assumed that there was nothing I could do about it...armed with this new information and the pictures, I called my PS to see if I could get in to talk to him this week before my procedure on Monday.

They worked me in last evening and the end result of the conversation is that he thinks the best approach would be to open my LBL scar and do a revision.  He said that over time, an incision high up will migrate down and cause undesirable results.  He is doing the revision without charging me for his time.  This time I hope to have a great FLAT tummy with no roll over!!!

So, on Monday I will have a bracheoplasty, breast augmentation and revision to my tummy...and I have to be back at work in a week!!!!

Say a prayer for me!!!

Well, I'm scheduled for my next surgery...this time I'm getting breast implants and am also getting my arms done!  I can't wait!!!  

My arms bother me alot!  I hate the hanging skin.  Some people say that they don't think it looks bad...but it looks bad to me and that's what matters!  Also, I have no breast tissue left.  I was always small, but now it is really sad.  I should be a full B or small C when all is said and done.

The PS said that I have a very narrow ribcage...(who would have believed that???) and getting my new breasts big enough will be a challenge.  I'm getting high profile implants which are smaller around but thicker so hopefully it will all work out great.

I'll post after the surgery and let you know how things went!

Hey All!

Well, I'll have my two year surgiversary in a few weeks...June 20th is the date.  

I'm still maintaining my weight loss of 100 pounds, weighing 134.  I have fluxuated a few pounds, but I weigh very often...mostly every day and try to adjust my eating to what I weigh.  I' still wearing a size 4!  It still seems crazy that I can be this size but I love it!

I took a new job in February, so no one here knows me as a fat person.  I'm not ashamed about my past so I have shared with them that I had surgery, but it is still cool that they don't associate me with being overweight.

I'm going to call next week to schedule a consultation with my plastic surgeon to get an estimate on getting my breasts and arms done this summer.  I'm ready!  I HATE the way my arms look and my poor girls are down to nothing after the weight loss!

Thanks for visiting, I hope my story will inspire you!

October 27, 2006 Hey All,  Just a quick update and big "THANK YOU" to Gina, aka Protein Princess for putting the cute black poodles on my profile.  

I'm now 11 weeks out from my LBL and hysterectomy, things are going well, no real problems.  I'm not super happy with how my thighs are starting to "settle" so when I go for my 6 month check-up with Dr. Knowling, I'm going to talk with him about how they look and what we can do about it.  Meanwhile, I've taken to wearing a thigh shaper to kind of hold things in until I see him again in February.

I'm feeling a little bit sad today over stuff that happened this week on the Bama Board.  I don't want to get any thing started there again, but feel like it will help me move on to vent it here.  

The bama board is a very active board with lots of postings daily.  There are several great daily postings and then lots of general "help wanted" and "prayers needed" types of things all the time.  I observed that we had lots of recipe postings which were great for all of us who are trying to change our eating and cooking habits, but most of the time each recipe was posted as a single entry main post.  The result of this was in my opinion was that the more specific posts that needed responses got kind of lost in the posts that didn't require a response...a recipe...so I posted a SUGGESTION that we post our recipes on the recipe forum with one notification that there were new recipes to be seen...Karen Temple, a very sweet friend, suggested that instead of posting them on the recipe forum we keep them on the Bama Board but all under one general "Recipe" post each day.  I thought that was a wonderful idea!!!  Keep them on the bama board, but they would be condensed under one heading...easy to find. print and save, yet not pushing topics that needed a reply off the front page so fast...

You can imagine my suprise and dismay when the whole thing blew up into a major fight on the boards.  Some people were really ugly to me personally...I felt like my character and motives were questioned...and some people were really hateful to others under the guise of "agreeing with me" which was never my intention to be hurtful to anyone!  I did recieve several very encouraging and supportive private emails...those who responded to me privately know who you are...I will be eternally grateful for your kind words in the midst of this upset.

I would suggest to all who read this...think twice or three times before you hit the submit button.  Several times during this whole thing, I've had really nasty replys all ready to send and reread them over and over then deleted it...I didn't want to fuel the flames so to speak, and chose instead to take the high road.  Much c*ap could be avoided if you would just reread your replys and take the high road.

Today my suggestion went into practice and it seems to be working really well.  I'm just sorry I had to get thrown under the bus to make it happen.

October 13, 2006 Things are going great for me! I'm nine weeks out from my Lower Body Lift and hysterectomy. It's great not having periods anymore! Loving the body lift as well! I'm solidly in a size 4 now!!! I wear a few 6's depending on the style and brand, but mostly everything is a 4 or small!!

My weight seems to have stabelized at 132. I'm maintaining that weight pretty easily. Sometimes I dip lower and sometimes I'm a little higher, but I think all that is fairly normal...it's only a couple of pounds either way. I like this weight and am going to strive to stay right here!

The cruise was wonderful...yes, I did wear the bikini on two occasions and felt great! I didn't get a picture in it though. I know, I know, I promised post body lift pictures....I'll really make an effort to get some taken of me and posted.

Going to STL this weekend to help Meg pack up her condo. They are moving to Franklin, TN!!!! They will be just one hour from my house!!! I'm so happy that they will be so close. Now if I can just pray Lacey down here as well!!!

9/11/06 I'm doing great after my surgery!! Sorry I haven't gotten new pictures posted yet....I'll try to work on that! I'm 4 1/5 weeks out and am really happy with my results. I still have a little swelling but not bad at all.

I'm continuing to lose weight slowly. I really don't want to lose anymore, I'm down to 130 and my goal was 134. I'm trying to eat more, but it just isn't happening. I suppose that when I'm fully recovered, the weight will pick back up. I know that right now, I'm using most of my calories to heal from this big trauma to my body.

Next Sunday we go on our long-awaited cruise!!! I'm so excited!! I started packing my clothes last night. I'm going to wear a bikini for the first time in my entire life!! I feel rather naked in it, but for one time in my life I'm gonna do it. With all the great food on the cruise, I may not be complaining about losing too much weight when we get back!

8/1/06 Today is my 25th Wedding Anniversary!!! I can't believe I've been married for 25 years, but here it is!!! I have a sweet loving husband that remained faithful to me during all the fat, crabby years! Now he just has to put up with thin and crabby! :) I'm so blessed to have a great husband to is a great dad to my children. I love you Andy!!! We are going out to dinner tonight. I'll try to take our picture and post one here for you to see him. I just realized that I don't have any pictures of him on this profile.

8/18/06 Here I am one week post op from my hysterectomy and lower body lift...I'm doing great!!! Dr. Knowling took off 6 pounds of skin from around my body and already the change is amazing. I've done very well, started out with 4 drains and a pain pump. On Monday, after my surgery last Thursday, they pulled out two of the drains and the pain pump. Today at my check-up one more drain was removed. I go in again next Tuesday and the plan is to remove the last drain and also to remove the stitches around my new belly button. When I get the last drain out, I'll post pictures.

July 5, 2006 Another month come and gone and it's July already!!! Time sure flies these days!!

We had a fun 4th weekend, didn't get to go to STL to see my girls, but attended a baby shower for our niece and that was fun. Lacey will be coming down here on the 15th of this month for a week! I'm looking forward to it!

I got a surgery date for my hysterectomy and lower body lift. Dr. Knowling is going to do my plastics and I'm really excited. As you can see from the pictures taken at the PS office, the lower body lift is the procedure that I need. He is much more reasonable than the first Dr. that I consulted with. His price to do it at the same time as my hysterectomy is $11,060. I called Care Credit and had my limit increased to $11,000 so I guess we are set. I have to call my GYN to set up my pre-op visit with him...my pre-op with the PS is July 14th. My surgery will be August 10!!! Lacey and Meghan are both coming down here to be with me for a few days. I'm glad, I'm sure I'll need them! I'm planning to return to work in two to three weeks, and we have our 25th anniversary cruise 5 1/2 weeks after my surgery! Let's all pray for a speedy complication-free recovery!

7/31/06 Surgery is still on for the 10th! I'm excited and scared at the same time! I've bought a couple of real two piece bathing suits to wear on the cruise so that should be interesting! I guess I'll post a picture of me in one of them while we are on the cruise!

My weight is stable right now at 139.8. I fluxuate a few pounds but nothing major. I'm wearing 6's very comfortably and my new clothes are 4's!!!! All my tops are smalls. It's pretty cool! Most of the time I still don't see myself as thin. I'm hoping after the LBL I'll be able to tell much more of a difference. I can see that my clothes are smaller, and I can see myself in the mirror as smaller, but when I look at my naked body, all I can see are the rolls and flabs...it's sad. I'm really hoping the surgery will help me with body image.

June 5, 2006, I've been so bad about updating my profile...sorry!

Well, the "Idiot Proof" Diet didn't last too long! I'm no more successful at staying on a "you must eat this" kind of plan than I was pre-op. I think I stayed on it about two and a half days! I'll have to just keep eating small amounts, trying not to graze, keep protein first and eat no processed sugar until I reach my goal weight...or until the weight loss stops. My new lowest weight is 142.8...at any given date I weigh a pound or two more than that but that's they way it's been since I started this journey. I'm solidly in a size 6 and that makes me really happy. If I stay this weight, I'll be happy...if I lose down to 134 or so I'll be happy! I would like to get into the 130's just because I think it sounds cool, and because I've NEVER weighed that little!

I'm really wanting to get plastics done. I can't wear anything that comes above my knees because my thighs are so saggy that the skin bags around my knees...bummer! I can't wear anything without my majorly padded bra...like a halter top with a shelf bra, because I have no breasts...they flatten out like a pancake! My arms make this annoying clapping sound when I wear a short sleeve or sleeveless top...and my stomach...well it's not a pretty sight. I don't know how I'm going to afford it, but I'm holding out hope that I'll be able to get the work done eventually.

Last week I started having some unexplained abdominal pain. It started last Tuesday around 10:00 am at work. By 3:00 I was still in pain and knew something wasn't right. I decided to go to my surgeon's office to see if they could work me in. I was told that I could sit and wait but that they were busy and if he couldn't get to my by 5:00 I would have to go to the emergency room...or I could wait and see one of the other Dr.'s but he was at the hospital doing rounds and they didn't know when he would be back. I decided not to sit there and wait...if I had to wait two hours and still have the possibility of having to go to the ER and wait for hours over there, I would just go home. If it got so bad I couldn't stand it, I would go to the ER later. So I went home, put on my jammies and laid on the couch all evening. During the night, the pain woke me up and I was up for several hours. The next morning, I called his nurse and told her that I was still in pain that I needed some help. I told her that my feelings were hurt the day before when I wasn't seen then. She got me in to see one of the other surgeons that afternoon. Dr. Foreman thinks that I have another internal hernia or adhesions. He offered to admit me then and do surgery that night, but I wasn't in enough pain to jump into another surgery right then! He scheduled me for some lab work and a CT scan for Friday. I had that done and am waiting to hear the results...I've left a message for his nurse to see if she can give me the preliminary report today, if not, I have another appointment for Wednesday afternoon. I hope something showed up so that they will know what the cause is...otherwise, we may have to schedule an exploratory surgery to see if they can find the problem. The pain seems to be very positional...in other words it hurts more in certain positions than in others, but not every time. Saturday night I laid down to go to bed on my left side and what ever it was really got kinked! The pain was so intense! I had to jump up to my feet and then it relaxed...this happend twice. If that happens to me again and doesn't let go, I'll be in really bad shape, and will have to go the the ER ASAP!

I'll try to keep this better updated with what happens with the CT and labs.

6/13/06 Well, my CT scan didn't show any reason for the abdominal pain that I was having. The pain is gone now so that is good! My lipase level was slightly elevated and Dr. Foreman said it could possibly indicate a mild pancreatitis...we are just going to wait and see if it happens again. Of course the possibility of an internal hernia or adhesions is still in play...we'll just see what happens!

The CT scan did show a large fibroid tumor in my uterus...I took the results of that to my GYN and I have to go in tomorrow to let him evaluate the situation. It's almost 3 inches around...yuck! I want it out! I know they are common and lots of women have them, but the thought of having an orange sized growth in my pelvis is wierding me out! My weight is stable at around 143, still in size 6. I did try on a pair of 4's last week, they were too tight, but they buttoned and zipped!!! How cool!!

6/16/06 I had my appt. with the GYN and we decided to do a total abdominal hysterectomy, taking my ovaries and uterus. He said we could leave one ovary for the hormone support but it would only buy me about 2-4 years of hormore therapy before menopause gets it and that it would then just be a cancer risk to leave it...so they are both going. I dread the instant menopause, but he said if I need HRT for a few years that it would be fine. I'm going to see if I can stand it without them.

The good news about the whole thing is that I'm going to try to get a tummy tuck at the same time. My GYN agreed that this would be a great time to do it and will save me lots of money so I have a couple of consults in the next week and a half to see who I want to do it and how much it will cost. I applied for a care credit card any was approved for $6000. We'll see what they say it will cost.

6/26/05 I had one consult last Friday with the PS...he said that a tummy tuck won't do the trick for me...I need a lower body lift and that it can't be done at the same time as my hysterectomy...bummer! Oh...and he wants $18,500 for the procedure!!! I have another consult tomorrow with another Dr. so we'll see what he says...I don't know what direction I'll take with this. Here are the pictures that the first PS took in their office...I scanned them in and no matter how I try, I can't get them to resize...I guess I'll just have to leave them big!

I had another attack of abdominal pain on Saturday. This one happened about 2 hours after lunch, and lasted for about 3 hours. The only way I could get relief was to lay flat on my back...I'm going to call Dr. Facundus' nurse to get her to document it.



These are my pre-op plastics pictures, lower body lift scheduled for August 10. 2006

May 2, 2006 Back home after our weekend in STL. We had a wonderful time! I really enjoy getting to go back to visit our girls and our friends...I miss them all so much. Maybe God will let us be together again sometime. This trip, Lacey's boyfriend Nick asked my husband for her hand in marriage! We've been expecting it, but I guess she'll be engaged before long!

I posted my late 10 month pics...I just love that dress! I've ALWAYS wanted a dress like that, but my hips were always to big for that shape dress. That dress is a Jones New York size 6!!! I think it's too cute!

Things are going great with my weight. I'm now buying size 6's pretty consistantly! I got some clothes in STL...size 6 Calvin Klein jeans, a cute new suit in a size 6...it's all so much fun! Today I started my new "diet". It's the Idiot Proof Diet that I bought on the internet. It contains all the foods that I normally eat, it's just got them arranged a bit differently. I'm doing a big push from now to my anniversary date (June 20) to lose the last 13 pounds that I have to reach my "ideal" body weight. I'm acutally pretty happy where I am now, but I'd like to reach the ideal number for once in my life! I've always based my loss on my scale reading, but I think for me to officially reach a 100 pound loss I'll have to get down to 132 on my doctor's scale. We'll see what happens with this diet...you stay on it for 11 days then go off of it for 3 days. Then you go back to the website and it will do a new 11 day diet for you. "They" say you can lose 9 pounds in 11 days...I'm not thinking that I'll do that this close to goal, but if it can help me with the big push that will be great!

4/6/06 April is here! Spring is so beautiful. I started my WLS journey one year ago with my first visit to BWI. Today I met with Hunter the nutritionist. He is so encouraging. I enjoy meeting with him and today he even offered to review my food logs for me if I email them to him. I've been concerned about my old eating habits creeping back in. I've been snacking way to much in the afternoons. This has got to stop! So I'm focusing on three meals a day with one snack in the afternoon. I'm going to journal my food for awhile to keep myself accountable. I simply refuse to go back to my old ways of eating and thus my old weight. This will be a tool that I use to keep this weight off!

I still want to lose some more weight. Where I'll end up is uncertain. Hunter agrees with Dr. Facundus that I look great and not to stress over the numbers. I've lost 33% of my total body weight he said that was great. I'm going to focus on eating right and getting my exercise in and see what happens. I am responsible for what goes in my mouth and I will make responsible choices. I've slipped enough and it's over!

4/11/06 Well I'm happy to report that I have achieved control over my diet once again!!! Seems that journaling my food did the trick! It really helped me get a grip on what I was eating and what I actually needed to be eating. I'm so thankful! The scales began to move again and I'm down to 149! I'm so happy to be out of the 150's! This is absolutely the lowest weight I've been since like junior high.

Isn't it funny the way we perceive things? I've always felt fat...since I can remember, I've felt fat. All my earliest childhood memories are of me being fat. Last weekend I ran into an old childhood friend. We talked awhile and I told her about my surgery last June...I said well you know I've always been fat...she looked at me kind of funny and said, I really don't remember you as fat...you were a little thick like I was, but I wouldn't say you were fat. She has not known me as an adult through my really fat years. I showed her a picture of me before my surgery. She said "I wouldn't have recognized you then, but now you look like I think you should look." I wonder if our distorted self image contributes to the reality...like I always felt really fat so I became really fat...I don't know, but it's interesting to think about.

Tonight I'll see another old friend that I've known my whole life. In fact, he is probably one of the reasons I always felt fat...he used to tease me terribly about being fat. The last time I saw him was this time last year, before my surgery and about 85 pounds ago. I can't wait to see his face when he sees the new size 6 me!!!!

Speaking of size 6's...I just bought my first size 6 clothes this week. This is so cool! I am really starting to see myself as thin. It will be interesting to see my 10 month pictures and see what I think of my body. I'll post them, seems that I have posted my progress every 2 months so on the 20th it will be time for the 10 month ones.

4/13/06 Things are still going very well for me. Seems that journaling my food is just the ticket for keeping me honest! This morning wearing only my saggy skin, I weighed 148.2! I'm starting to get more comments on recent loss...I guess when you weigh less, it takes fewer pounds to show your loss. I know it takes fewer pounds for me to be able to wear smaller sizes than it did when I was 220 and over.

Our dinner the other night was really fun! The guy we met for dinner didn't say anything at all about my weight at first. We greeted each other and were seated at the table. Then he finally turned to me and said, "So where is the other person that you have lost?" It was funny! We had a great time getting caught up and I really enjoyed being thin and feeling normal!

4/24/06 Things are going well for me, life is good! I keep hovering around 148-149. If I stay this weight, I'll be ok. I need to get back on the exercise band wagon though...I know it's good for me and it would probably help me lose the last 14 pounds, but I'm not stressing about it!

We had a fun weekend. Meghan came home for the weekend. We took the boat out on Saturday and that was fun. I never have been able to get up on skis, so this is the summer that I will learn to ski. Saturday, it was only 75 degrees and the water was cold, so I didn't try, but I will do it this summer. Meghan and I rode the tube together. It was so fun to fit on the tube with her and not completely make the thing off balance!

After she left on Sunday, Andy and I cut the grass and then we went to play golf. This was the first golf I've played in years. I got new golf clubs and shoes for Christmas, this was the first time I've gotten to even hit them. We had lots of fun. We only played 9 holes and we played "best ball" so it was fun working together to make pars.

I love being so much more active and being able to enjoy simple things in life, like boating and golf. I wish I didn't have all the saggy skin that I have, but I'd rather be the size I am with saggy skin than be 230 pounds with it tight!

I left my digital camera in STL last time we were there, so I had to take my 10 month pictures with film. As soon as I get the film finished, I'll post the pictures...if they turn out. Otherwise, we are going to STL this weekend. I'll get my camera and take some slightly late 10 month pics to post.