charlene1
8 Month Post-Op
Jan 18, 2010
I've learned a lot so far, like getting in my fluids, proteins, eating slow, chew, chew, chew, watch the sugar, learning what foods don't agree with my pouch and what does. I've been very fortunate that I haven't really been sick and I'd like to think it's because I've been so careful and also afraid of eating something that might make me sick. Don't get me wrong I have ate to fast on a few occasions and started to feel sick. Those are reminders I need.....slow down.
Before surgery I loved chocolate, sweets, well junk food in general would call my name. I'm not sure what happened but so far chocolate just doesn't taste so good any more. Neither does most starchy foods like rice, crackers, pasta, etc. I can eat a little but not much. My surgeon told me sometimes your taste changes after surgery but usually comes back and to go with it as long as I can. This has actually been good because I'm eating more fruits and veggies to get the "good carbs" but not going overboard with them. I've also become a lover of shrimp, it agrees with my pouch and full of protein. Chicken is good but can't eat as much of it as shrimp. Beef is okay, but I still can't eat very much. Eggs.....that's another story. I ate so many eggs in the beginning, you know they're soft, easy to chew, lot's of protein but I just can't eat them very often now.
Exercise.....well, that's still a work in progress. I don't love it, but with the weight loss I've found my feet, knees, and hips don't hurt like they use to. I have so much more energy that walking is a good thing and dancing around the house is really fun. My husband says he's not so sure he'll be able to keep up with me this summer when I want him to help me work in the yard :-)
The best part of all this so far is "SHOPPING." I use to wear a 24, 2-3XL depending on the cut, now I'm wearing L or XL tops, sweaters and 16 dresses. Pants a 16W since my hips have always been the biggest area of the body but the lower half is beginning to catch up with the upper part. I tried on some 16 misses pants and they fit. It's so hard not to go out and buy a bunch of clothes, but I hope to be smaller next winter than I am now and just don't see spending more money than I have to. That's the hard part, but I will say I'm really looking forward to summer shopping.
If I had to sum up everything into 4 words it would be "Just Follow the Program."
Happy Thanksgiving
Nov 22, 2009
Happy Thanksgiving to all. I've been thinking about the past year as so much has happened, mostly good but some bad. The soul searching leading to my decision to have weight loss surgery. It can be very difficult to look deeply at ones life, decisions made, hurt feelings and heart breaks by those you love. Actions and words by those we love the most can and often hurt the most. Those word and actions we tend to carry with us for years and sometimes a lifetime. I finally came to the realization that carrying around those feelings only hurt "ME" not them. I let food become my friend when I felt family and friends had hurt me the most. Why do women think so much with their heart rather than their brain?
Now, for "Thanks"giving.
I'm thankful I took the journey of self reflection, digging into some of my most secret feelings of hurt and pain.
I'm thankful for the tears I shed when some of those memories came up. I'm thankful I finally took a close look at the person I had become on the outside.I'm not talking about the person I was deep inside, my heart, my love for my family, compassion for others hasn't changed. I'm talking about the person I saw in the mirror, the reflection of the one that looked back at me and how I wondered what had happened to the Charlene I use to know. Now, believe me I know I'll never be that teenager, the 20 or 30 something as age does catch up to us, but I knew I could do something for myself as it's never to late to make ones life better.
I'm thankful for a wonderful husband and daughter and their love and support. For loving me at 317 pounds and for loving me now. I'm thankful for their concern as to whether I'm drinking enough or getting my protein in. I'm thankful for their consideration as to whether something they're eating is bothering me. Sometimes I think I can't tell them enough how much I love them and how much they mean to me. Frank and Heather, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH and am thankful every second of the day for both of you.
I'm thankful for each of you on this website for encouragement and support and I just want to wish each and everyone of you a "Happy Thanksgiving."
Happy Halloween
Oct 29, 2009
I see my surgeon's PA November 4th for my 6 month post op, well actually it will be 5 1/2 months, but who's counting. My blood work was all good at my 3 month post op so I'm looking forward to seeing how it's doing now. I'm up to 800-1000 calories a day, based on her advise last check up. Doing well on my protein around 80grams a day and getting my fluids in. The protein has still been my biggest struggle since I'm still only eating around 1/2 to 2/3 cups of food per meal depending on what I'm eating. Protein supplements are still a staple in my daily menu (I started to say diet) but menu is a better word. Can't say I've fallen in love with exercise but I'm working on it.
My October Updates
Oct 13, 2009
My husband and daughter are very supportive for which I'm so grateful. Now speaking of my daughter, she's been in Law School for 2 months now and she's doing great. If you don't know, her Dad and I split up when she was a baby and it was just the two of us for almost 14 years before I met my current husband. She's not just my daughter, she's also my best friend. I'm so proud of her and the accomplishments she's made. Also grateful she's adjusted so well to Law School, being able to handle the demanding schedule and finding the time for a active social life and taking some time for herself.
One other update, we had some water damage to the underside of our kitchen floor which was discovered early July. Well, it took some time fighting with our insurance company to come to a settlement but the work on the kitchen begins today.....YEAH. The cabinets and counter tops are being torn out today. Depending on the weather the rest of the week, the entire kitchen floor has to be torn out a new one put in. Needless to say the rest of the house looks like a disaster area. We packed up everything in the kitchen and boxes are sitting everywhere. Hopefully everything will be finished in a couple of weeks and we can get things back to normal..... Just in time for Halloween.
Clothes, clothes, clothes....I love them
Sep 19, 2009
Now you might wonder what this has to do with clothes. Well, my niece which was my sister's only child hadn't gotten rid of her clothes. I'd kept telling my niece she should take them to a consignment store, yard sale or something, but now I'm so thankful she didn't. She brought 5 large trash bags of clothes with her to the beach. Mostly casual and dress tops, sweaters, dresses, jackets, and suits. To my surprise I can wear about 3/4's of what she brought. The only thing I really need to buy now is pants as my sister was shorter and they wouldn't have worked.
As I tried on my sister's clothes, I remembered her wearing so many of them. I fell as though I have a part of her with me and know she'd be thrilled knowing I can fit into them. From wearing 2X's and 3X's to wearing a L, XL she would be so proud. Of course I've been spending part of the day cleaning out the closet and filling it with so many pretty clothes. The hard part now will be trying to decide what to wear first.
Vacation
Sep 10, 2009
Looking Forward to Fall
Sep 01, 2009
I have had the joy and frustration of buying a few clothes. The joy is my 24's are way to big and look like...well I think most of you know what I'm talking about. I'm wearing a 18, not 18W but a misses 18 dress! Some 16's are good depending on how they are cut. The frustrating part is my hips just hasn't caught up with the upper part of my body, but I new I'd have that problem. The hips and legs have always been larger than the top half of my body and the slowest part to lose weight. In some pants I was wearing a 24/26, now I'm getting in 20's, won't be long before I get in a 18, but depending on how they're made to get them to fit the hips I have this big band gap at my waist in the back. Am I doomed to have to wear elastic waist pants for them to fit the waist?
I'm so thankful I had surgery and at times wish I'd done it sooner. I remind myself there is a time and place for everything and May, 2009 was my time. I feel so much better, am wearing heels to work and my feet don't hurt as much. I look at myself and just feel so much pride for what I've accomplished (with my RNY tool) and for what's looking back at me in the mirror. I haven't felt that in so many years. My husband has always loved me, there's never been any doubt about that but I see him looking at me, smiling and saying how pretty I look and it just makes me feel wonderful. Before I started this process I told him I didn't love myself anymore, but that's changing.
3rd Month Post Op Appt
Aug 25, 2009
There are some things I still need to work on. Fluids some days are still a problem and I'm only getting around 60 grams of protein per day and need to push it to 80 grams. I guess I need to add more unflavored protein to my unsweetened tea. That would kill two birds with one stone. I'm eating around 1/2 cup of food per meal which she was okay with but my total calorie intake is around 700 and said I need to work on increasing that some.
Honestly, I'm not exercising enough and have to work on toning, toning, toning. It's been so hot here and the heat has been killing me but I've got to work on that. Hummmm, got to set that as a priority goal. Other than that I feel the best I've felt in many, many years. My husband told the PA he's having a hard time keeping up with me. He worked this past weekend so I took advantage of his absence and packed up all my "to big" clothes. It was funny when he opened the closet and asked where all my clothes were. I simply said that's all I have to wear. What a wonderful feeling! I'm so thankful for my second chance on life.
3rd Month Anniversary
Aug 18, 2009
Before, I was ashamed of myself. Ashamed of how I'd let myself go. Ashamed of how I looked, how I felt other people saw me. Ashamed I wasn't a better example to my daughter. My back hurt, my knees hurt, I couldn't keep up with my family if we were out walking around. I always had to sit and rest and I felt bad, felt guilty I couldn't keep up. Shopping for clothes was depressing and I usually beat up on myself which made matters worse. I guess bottom line I was miserable with myself.
Now three months later I'm seeing myself different. It's kinda hard to explain, but sometimes I look in the mirror and see how I'm changing but at times I still see the old me, look again and ask is this really real? My old clothes no longer fit, what a wonderful feeling! Even though there's more weight to lose, I'm liking my transformation. I feel better, I feel happier, my back doesn't hurt, my knees doesn't hurt. I'm walking faster and not stopping to sit and rest. I'm keeping up with my family and sometimes get ahead of them. My mental outlook is so much better. I've actually been shopping for some things in the misses department. Misses I tell you, now that does seem strange.
I look at some of my before pictures and that feeling of being ashamed comes back, but I also see it as a reminder I have so much to live for and a reminder that I never want to be that person again. Overall, I'm grateful for so much and to have this second chance. This journey so far as been incredible and I'm looking forward to the rest of the journey.
Primary Care Doctor
Aug 14, 2009