Marie Cicogni
June 8, 2007
Jun 08, 2007
PHYSICALLY - Today I weigh 136 lbs. Today I am still absolutely grateful for this surgery and th elife it has given me back. Every single day I am aware of my eating - of what I can eat, what I can't eat - what I eat that I shouldn't - how it affects my weight - how much water I drink - how much protein I eat - did I take my vitamins today? did I exercise today? How am I physically feeling and why? How is my nutrition affecting how I am feeling? Did I exercise today?
It all remains an every day evaluation. This is what we wanted - this is what we need to do!
EMOTIONALLY - My mom's house just sold and I have moved on (after living with her and in her house for seven years). My ex finally moved on when the house sold (he rented a room from me) (as odd as it sounds we make much better friends than spouses). The last three weeks have been ones of closing (emotional) doors and opening new ones....ending chapters and starting new books. DOING THE BRAIN SURGERY THAT STOMACH SURGERY IS NOT to insure that I will not return to who and what I was 2 years ago.
Life is good - I am strong and confident - depending on myself to make my way in this world and depending on myself for my happiness and sense of fulfillment... taking full responsibility for everything that happens in my life - good, bad and indifferent. And I love it!!!!!!!!!!!
Do your work, people! You will succeed - if you want to. Take responsibility for your own physical and emotional health!
Love to you all who are struggling as well as succeeding!
Marie
May 2005 - November 6, 2006 - A Little History
Nov 03, 2006
May 10
Had my orientation today - while I don't think I learned anything new (except for Kaiser SSFO's process), it was nice to have all of my research, listening, observing validated. Dr. Baxter, Dr. Li, Dr. Stiles and Beth Goodrich were all very informative and interesting! 210 on Kaiser's scale.
May 17 - 207 on Kaiser's scale
Appointment with Beth Goodrich - she expressed being impressed with my understanding of the program, of my getting on board with it prior to orientation, of my adherence to the menu plan - said I was obviously doing something right as I was losing - since it "wasn't broke, she wouldn't try to fix it" - Whew! One down, two to go.....
May 21 - 204 on Kaiser's scale
Appointment with the surgery Goddess - Dr. Stiles. Mom and daughter were with me - she asked them questions, asked me questions - was again very impressed with my pro-active approach to the program and my preparation - she took my referral weight (or a weight from an appt I had in January that was reflected in my SSFO file) as my starting weight (223) and told me I was done with my required loss (at 204...) and when did I want surgery as I seemed to have it all together. WOW!!!
She couldn't locate the latest copy of the surgery schedule, so we ended up having to wait til' Monday to get a date.... as my daughter said... I did the happy dance all the way out of the hospital to the car!!!! Two down, one to go.
May 23 - got my date!!! June 16 with Dr. Gorrin..... woo hoo!
May 24 - got my pre-op appointments! This Friday May 27 for pre-op class..... Next week 6/1 with Dr. Gorrin - and 6/3 with Susan Dykhuizen, case worker and Maria Bibat, anesthesiologist. I am so happy! This is right where I wanted to be... on the FAST TRACK!!!
May 27 - pre-op class- I was almost embarassed to say when I had orientation because of the other 9 patients in the class, one started LAST MAY and the others had orientation in February and March. Here I am with orientation in May.
June 1, 2005 - 202.5 by Kaiser's scale
Had my appointment with Dr. Gorrin today - and it went very well - he is so nice - friendly - informative - had him explain to DH exactly what is going to happen. I am even more calm about all this than I was before. Have a very busy 15 days with work and preparing for this = it's gonna go waaayyyy fast!
June 13 - 3 more wake-ups - I am not nervous - I am still so amazed that this is actually happening - my husband just asked me if I was ready for this surgery - YES! YES YES!!! I am in awe - I cannot even begin to imagin what my life will be like. I understand the risks involved - I am not kidding myself that this will be an easy row to hoe - but I also know that I am prepared to work for my success. I am packed - have my Isopure protein drink in my bag so I can start taking in protein as soon as I can take clear liquids - at least sipping it - wherever this journey takes me, I'll be there doing everything I can to succeed.
WHEN YOU CHANGE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT THINGS, THE THINGS YOU LOOK AT CHANGE..... Dr. Wayne Dyer....
I have changed the way I look at my life over the last two years - and, by golly, the things I have been looking at have changed!!!
More later -
June 27 - WOW! It's been 11 days since surgery - I have now lost 12 lbs - had a laprsocopic RNY - was out of the hospital on the 2nd day after surgery - up and about since - no eating issues! As with the rest of my journey, I have had an easy time and I am grateful for whatever the reason - I am thankful every day.
November 11, 2005 .... 147.5 ... Total loss 77.5 since March... 53.5 since surgery on June 16... average 10 lbs per month. I don't know where the time has gone... almost five months since surgery. My experience has been so absolutely awesome and flawless that at times I wonder what will go wrong.
April 11, 2006 - Current weight - 133 lbs, total loss - 93 lbs since March 31, 2005.
In looking back, what a year it's been. I look at photos of me from last March and photos of me now and the difference astounds me. I have gone from a size 18/20/22 to a size 8. As Dr. Giti at Kaiser South San Francisco so accurately put it, this is stomach surgery, not brain surgery. I'm working on the brain surgery.... lol! The issues that were in my life before surgery are still there now. I am dealing with them, but not with food! I AM DEALING WITH THEM.. read that filing for divorce. If you have read this far, you know why. I'm happier with ME than I have ever been in my recollection. I'd do this surgery again in a heartbeat - and recommend for anyone considering it to learn all they can about it - the good, the bad and the indifferent - talk to people - read, read, read.... it's not an easy lifestyle, but it's not hard. It takes caring about your body, your nutrition, your health, your future - which if we had all done that all along, would not be here, right?? My hats off to all of you who have undertaken this journey - and I will continue to read your stories, and add to mine from time to time!
The magick is in you!
Marie
November 3, 2006
Current Weight - 134 - 17 months post op
The journey continues!
NUTRITIONALLY - It's an every day battle, people! Though I have maintained my weight since April, it is a daily conscious effort, don't ever forget that! Vitamins, supplements, protien, water... and what you stick in your mouth!
Over the last few months I've found I'm craving carbs... a hard one to fight! Good, bad or indifferent, I allow myself a little each day to satiate that need - and the rest is protien, fruits and vegetables.
EMOTIONALLY - Since April? My mom was diagnosed with cancer at the end of March and passed away at the end of May - treasure those people in your life that you love. Never take a day for granted! "I LOVE YOU" - three simple words that take about two seconds to say.
I started divorce proceedings in January, put it aside while my mom was ill, picked it up again in June after she died. It's now a done deal. A second big change in my life. We remain friends (for now anyway and I sincerely hope that continues - we just had too many philosophical differences to stay married).
My 7 year old grandson was just diagnosed with Childhood Bipolar Disorder. My daughter (his mother) with Fibromyalgia.
Life goes on... we do what we need to do. DO IT WITHOUT USING FOOD FOR COMFORT. Find other positive, healthy ways to comfort yourself.
Hugs and love and light to you all...
Marie
