My Ah-ha Moment

Dec 28, 2010

Well actually, I had two ah-ha moments, one before surgery and one after.  My wake up was our vacation in July of this year.  We went to a beach and shared a condo with family.  My husband and I slept on the pull out sofa for two nights.  I just wanted to die!  The pain I felt in my back, hip and legs was unbearable.  On the last night, he went and bought an air mattress but the damage was done.  I was in full- blown pain.

Hubby went and got me some pain meds but all he could find (that I wasn't allergic to) was a night time one that made me drowsy and loopy.  So here I am, at the beach, under the umbrella, feeling like Shamu, watching my family members play with my kids.  I felt so helpless, useless and fat!  On that beach, in NJ, was the moment I promised myself that I was gonna get myself under control before I died and let my family without at wife and mommy. 

When we got home, I called the Bariatric Center at my hospital and the rest was history.  Everything just came together.  God was directing my steps.  From start to finish, my surgery process was 3 months.  I started at 324 lbs on that beach and this weekend I reached my holiday goal of 255 lbs.  That makes a 71 lb loss, and a gain of energy and best of all NO PAIN!!!!

But my second ah-ha moment was over this weekend also.  I had a mini break down.  My husband taped the kids Christmas program at church ( by the way, they were just the cutest and blessed my heart)  but he put it after our 5 yr old's first day of kindergarten.  He was real excited when I came home to show me.  Something  like," you got to see this, see how much weight you lost!!!!", excetra. 

I was watching me on this tape, and I just wanted to weep.  I think I am still shell-shocked.  To think that was me on the tv just broke my heart.  I was a dead woman walking.  Even now, I can't believe how much I was fooling myself.  Never in a million years did I see myself so big.

I thank God that I had this opportunity to change my life.

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About Me
Youngstown, OH
Location
37.2
BMI
VSG
Surgery
10/25/2010
Surgery Date
Jul 30, 2010
Member Since

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