colleenmarie
Amanda is my Angel. Thank you so much. I love you. <3<3<3
hmmm... where to start... i guess first off, I am currently 33, living in Portland Oregon with my fiance Chris. i have been fighting my weight all my life. but I would have to say that it has become out of control since 2001. I have tried all kinds of diets and due to lack of motivation I would fail, but now that I can barely move I have a whole different outlook on the meaning of trying to succeed and not trying at all.
my highest weight was 499. For the last year I have been working with the obesity institute at Good Samaritan Hospital and the feeling of success is a wonderful thing. I have been working on a food log and weight management and it feels good to have finally lost 30 pounds in the last 4 months. Although i am so scared right before i get on the scale each month in fear that I have gained, but then seeing the weight come off is such a wonderful feeling. This has taught me that just by eating healthy and in moderation weight loss can happen. I never was this succesful on Jenny Craig or LA Weightloss, but then it may have been the lack of trying. So far I have am looking forward to Roux en-Y in January of 2008. I am so excited about it. I have the support of my parents, my sister and most of all my fiance Chris. I thank God everyday that I have them. All my life i have been an independant person and very strong willed and controlling and since i have let me weight become out of control i have felt out of control and helpless and upset that I can't do the things I used to do. I can barely walk right now. I have lymph papillomas on my legs, swelling and poor circulation that make it painful to walk or exercise. I have felt for so long like I was misunderstood and alone. But now that I am starting to lose weight so has my attitude and my outlook and I feel good about planning for the future. it depresses me to actually write about myself, but I look forward to the new life I will have and the journey to a fit lifestyle. i am very excited and happy when I think about all I have planned and will be doing in the next few years of my life after my surgery. YAY!!! this is what keeps me hanging on and fighting to become healthy again. No more blaming my family for my obesity, I take full reponsibility for what I have done to my body and my life. *smile*
