Boxing Day Sad: Poor little Peanut

Dec 26, 2018

So, I had to put my kitten down today. He had FeLV and went from a happy, frolicking, snuggly, and energetic kitten to deathly ill in 10 days. I'm shocked and saddened. My kids are sad. This isn't the best Boxing Day.

One thing I noticed, on the WLS surgery front, is that I didn't feel like comfort eating. Ordinarily, pre-surgery, with something this sad and stressful, I would have turned to some high fat, high sodium, high carb food, like Nachos or fried chicken, to help me "feel better". As I was driving from the vet and on my way to the Humane Society for cremation, I was thinking that normally, I'd be plotting my comfort eating. But I had no appetite.

In fact, I have noticed that it takes me a LONG time to feel hungry. For the first four weeks, post-surgery, I was eating on a very regimented schedule. But, since I've been on holiday break, I'm home and the boys are home and I'm not on any schedule. For the last four days, my eating has been TERRIBLE. Not eating until 11. Forgetting to drink regularly. Not getting my protein. What's worst about this is that it's actually an old habit. In the past, I've done the feast/famine cycle where I don't eat for long periods and then make up my caloric deficit, plus extra, by eating one calorie-laden meal. Eating regularly throughout the day helps me to feel and sleep better. I'm scared to relapse into my old ways.

To compound it all, cooking kills my appetite and making holiday meals on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day ensured that I'd only pick at things. I'm not meeting any food goals right now.

Well, to quote Scarlett O'Hara, tomorrow is another day.

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Nov 19, 2018
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