cushingsa
I am just barely 5' tall and I have been fat for as long as I can remember. I am an emotional eater and I overeat. Occasionally I find myself sneaking food - usually when that happens I binge - get in as much as I can as though it won't "count" if I don't eat in front of people. I have lost weight in the past - once weighing as low as 107 lbs as I entered high school. This was my first and only successful attempt at Weight Watchers. I cannot count how many time since then that I have joined WW and "failed".
I kept the weight fairly stable through high school and into my early twenties until I became pregnant with my first child. I viewed this period as a time to eat "freestyle". Nothing was off limits and there was no portion control. On June14, 1986 I had my daughter and didn't really try to lose the weight. A little over a year later, still overweight, I got pregnant with my son. On June 15, 1988 my son was born. Shortly afterward I got "my stuff" together and got very involved with exercise. I joined a local Jazzercise class and became immediately addicted. I slimmed down and was very healthy - I bought a Jazzercise franchise and started teaching my own classes. I was very successful and healthy and happy for about 5 years. For a variety of reasons I gave up my franchise and almost immediately gained weight. Over the years I lost and gained - but never had the success and health I had when teaching my classes. I've tried WW so many times I can't even tell you how many. I've tried Curves & Diet Centre - bought almost every diet book out there and tried almost every diet out there including the cleanses. Initially I lost some weight - but it always came back and then some.
My every waking moment is consumed with food and diet. It's exhausting. I've got a wonderfully supportive husband of 25 years come August who has loved me at 107 lbs through my top weight of 199 lbs. Just a week ago I booked my lap band surgery for May 14th. I have considered this for the past 5 years and always talked myself out of it - thinking it was too extreme. I am very healthy - no health issues whatsoever. On May 7th I will be turning 48 years old - I want to stay healthy. I have a good friend who had wls in the US a few months ago and has lost over 140 lbs - she looks fantastic and better still - is healthy and happy. I want that too.
