ddcdiva
~MY STORY~
I am a married mother of 3 teenage boys. I have been researching WLS since December 2002. My insurance (Kaiser) requires that I meet with a nutritionist once a month for 6 months then they make a recommendation to approve or deny insurance coverage. I had my 6th appointment on May 21, 2003. So now I am just anxiously awaiting.
My husband and children are very supportive and most friends. However there have been a few friends/family that are skeptical of just any surgery period. So after my first discussion with them, I just don't discuss it with them anymore.
AMOS has been a great resource. I love looking at all the before and after pics of everyone. It's so encouraging.
6-10-03 ~ I just got my profile page updated. Enjoy. I plan to get pics added soon.6-13-03 ~ My pic was added today. It's from 2 years ago when my son graduated high school. I was about 10 lbs lighter than I am now. I am still playing the waiting game for insurance approval. I had my last nutritionist appointment on May 21, 2003. The "obesity board" (I still cringe at the sound of that word) only reviews recommendations once a month. So I am hoping by the end of the month I will know one way or the other and if denied can start trying for appeals. I leave for the Virgin Islands for the first two weeks of July, was hoping to know before then. But, patience is a virtue I guess. I'm trying real hard to be patient. I don't want to bug the doctor's office just yet. I'm just anxious to get to the other side. In the meantime I'll just keep surfing AMOS and looking at all the other beautiful people that have crossed over and continue to give me encouragement. 6-17-03~I went to my first Staple Club Meeting last night. It is a WLS support group with meetings held at Fairfax Hospital in Virginia. Even though I have done loads of research on WLS it just felt so good to be in the same room with 30+ people who understood the struggle of weight loss. The tremendous support and sharing was so encouraging. The maker of a new protein was there "unjury" I think Selina mentioned it here before. I can't wait till the next 3rd Monday to go to the next meeting.
I encourage those who keep putting off going to support meetings to go ahead and go, it'll definitely be worth your while. Thanks to all of you out there who are willing to share your WLS experiences. It really keeps us pre-ops going.
6-26-03 ~ Okay, talk about being excited!! I got a call from Kaiser today saying that I got surgery approval but my Primary Care Physician wants to meet with me first before sending a referral to the surgeon. I feel like I am going to burst from excitement!! My PCP appointment is tomorrow. It's been 7 months into this weight loss journey, since I started researching and pursuing insurance approval. I can't wait to be on the other side. I ran across a couple of profiles yesterday of some that have passed on due to surgery and got discouraged for a moment, but I have to remember if it's my time to go home to be with the Lord then it doesn't matter what I do or don't do. I believe I have God's blessing for this surgery and that he wants me to present my body as a living sacrifice Holy and Pleasing to him. It can't be pleasing to him, nor am I effective in serving the Kingdom if I have physical limitations due to weight. Anyway, today is a great day. Before I heard from the doctor's office, the director of my organization came to me and told me that I am being awarded an "outstanding Performance Award" The highest award for local government employees. I get $300 for that award and a day off work and of course "a special mug" Needless to say, I feel amazingly blessed today. I know I am blessed every day, but today just feels so good!! I know many others have had this joy of insurance approval. I wonder what I'll feel like when I get a date scheduled.....hmmmm.....we'll see. Thanks to all of you out there who have given so much love and support to all us pre ops.
6-30-03 ~ Well, I went to see my PCP on Friday, was very excited because I have received insurance approval, only to find that Kaiser's employees need training on WLS approval process. He seemed not to know anything. He wanted me to have a physical, I told him I'd already done that, he seemed not to even know the requirement of meeting with the nutritionist. Anyway, I think he put in the referral for the surgeon, but since I leave for vacation for 2 weeks in the morning, I guess I'll have to wait until then to find out- ugh! Anyway, I shouldn't be discouraged for I am still closer than where I was in December, everything in God's time. Virgin Islands here I come!! I'll have to do a lot of catching up on the Boards and new pics when I come back. Take care everyone!!
~7-13-03~
I am just returning from the Virgin Islands. What a great trip. I just kept thinking how much more fun it would have been as a thinner person. As the heaviest person on this trip I just felt as if I worried about stuff other had no concern about. Of course when you are obese the first thing you think about is being able to fit in the airplane seat without being embarrassed to ask for a belt extender. Fortunately I made it in the seatbelts but barely. Traveling with 40 teenagers and needing an extender would not have been a pretty sight. I still needed to have the arm rests up to be comfortable. Fortunately most people didn't mind that. Overall it was a great trip.
My referral went to the surgeon while I was away so I will be calling tomorrow to schedule a consult. I've decided to take this time and write down some goals I'd like to accomplish with the surgery. They are in no particular order.
1. Goal weight 150 lbs.
2. Shop for clothes that are not plus size
3. Be able to wear my shirt inside my pants and be comfortable.
4. Have my body be more flexible
5. Be able to fit on amusement park rides w/o being afraid I'll be the only one to fall out or not fit. I stopped riding rides about 2 years ago.
6. Be able to sit in my husband's lap w/o feeling like I'll crush him.
7. Be physically fit enough to play whatever sport I choose.
8. When walking down a hall don't have people squeeze against the wall just to feel like that's the only way they can get by you.
9. For people not to be surprised when I play sports well.
10. To feel more comfortable in my clothes.
11. To have the courage to tell people that I have had surgery.
These are just a few of my goals when I am post op. I am about 8 months into this journey and cannot "weight" I mean "wait" to get to the other side. I will update again soon.
~7-14-03 ~
My consult with the surgeon is scheduled for August 14th. I was hoping to get in sooner, but patience is a virtue. I just keep reminding myself that I much further along than when I started in December 2002.
I found this on Teena's site, I thought it was great so I am adding it to mine.
You Know You Are A WLS Patient When
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"I have a date" doesn't mean you are going out.
You have baby food in the house and no baby.
"I'm a loser" is a good thing.
All of your silverware says "Gerber"
A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking anymore.
"Welcome to the other side" does not mean you have die.
New clothes fall off the next week.
You are excited about "hand me downs"
The scale at Wal-Mart doesnt'r say "one at a time please"
Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
Just water for me please.
Hitting the "Century Mark" is a good thing!
You love the taste of Chewable Centrum Rugrats Vitamins or biting the head off of Wilma
You can be Touched by an Angel and not be considered crazy.
When your rear end doesn't look like a mud slide anymore???
When your excited your incision is only 6 inches
When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club!!
Other women are calling you "bitch" behind your back.
When you are glared at in the plus size dept because you really don't belong there anymore!
When you really don't have a thing to wear!
When you have to prove you are you on your license!
When you start being IN the pictures, not behind the camera!
Life has new possibilities.
You want to hug everyone who is fat and give them your surgeon's card.
You are never without a bottle of water.
When people look surprised when they see how little you eat.
When you know all too well the definition of "dumping".
When you can see your feet for the first time in years!!
When you order a doggy bag the same time you order your meal.
Counting protein grams instead of calories
You can say "Oh, I won't have any of that, I'm full" and really mean it
Being to small for your britches.
When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position in your bra & secure with a pony-tail holder!!! (sorry for the visual guys!)
Having someone say, "I can put my arm (not arms) all the way around you!!"
When you go to your child's school and the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot!
When you go to the mall and you park in the first open space instead of circling for 20 minutes for a spot by the door.
When you and your new best WLS friend are planning a date to get belly button rings...(or a tattoo!)
You truly are a "Cheap date" and not in the way that some think.....
When one drink makes you a flipping floozy...
When you run you don't hear a flapping noise.....oh wait you still do.....but at least your running!
When not throwing up counts as a really good day!
When you flip up your shirt to show your scar to a complete stranger!
You feel like you have over eaten after eating half a cup of something.
Vitamins and calcium etc. feel like a meal.
When your pants suddenly fall to the ground!
You go from size 56 DDDD to 32AAA and in one year and you didn't have a breast reduction.
When the chef comes out from the kitchen and asks you "what's the matter, don't you like the meal?"
You've just lost 100 pounds, and someone who hasn't seen you in a while says .... "Gee, did you change your hairstyle?" or what did you do, cut down on carbs?
When you bend over and see daylight through your thighs.
You can cross your legs....both of em!
When you say, "I just got these clothes last week and they're already too big!"
Trying to cash a check and the teller says, "That's not you!"
Instead of the "Wonder Bra" you need a "Wonder Where They Went Bra"
When you walk by a mirror and say to yourself "Who is that girl?"
When people take a double look at you.
When you go out for the evening and feel like Cinderella.
When your obsession turns from food to your scale.
When they no longer have to call 911 and the jaws of life to extricate you from the turnstiles
When your boobs are no longer just big, but they're are now also looonngg.
When the Sharpei you pass on the street reminds you of someone......You!
When taking a splinter out of your own foot no longer involves rope with the tweezers or a second party with tweezers.
When you start buying shoes that tie again.
When your hand will fit in the Pringles can again, but you don't want any.
When the thought of an all you can eat buffet makes you want to barf.
When the steering wheel in your car no longer cuts off the circulation in your tummy
You no longer have a mark on your shirt from the steering wheel rubbing on it.
When you drop food, it no longer lands on your boobs, but hits your lap where the napkin is.
No more cracked toilet seats!
You can avoid the handicap stalls in public restrooms because you can now "fit" in a regular stall.
The thought of flying coach no longer sends you into a panic attack.
When your able to tuck a blouse into your pants
When you don't use the tongs to fry chicken
When you are excited to be able to go to the thrift shops and get your dressy clothes
When the flight attendant doesn't reach for the seat belt extender & you can sit by the window
When you can drive your car with the steering wheel down, and you can bring the seat somewhat closer to the gas pedal, instead of using your tippy toes
When people actually "see" you and talk to you, and not through you like you are invisible.
When you order a child's meal, and take half of it home in a doggie bag
When checking for leaks doesn't mean looking at your panties!!!!!!
When your spandex shorts are used for *JOGGING*, and not merely as an anti-chaffing between-the-thighs-shielding-device.
When your exercise equipment isn't just for drying your fine washables anymore.
When you start dropping things on purpose, just because you can pick it up so easily now.
People who know you are concerned that you are working out too much.
You mother says "dear, you aren't eating enough".
When you can honestly say "I threw my back out from a combo of mountain climbing in the daytime and too much wild sex in the nighttime on my romantic vacation with my new Swedish boyfriend, Sven", instead of "I threw my back out trying to wipe my own @$$".
When they say "put your trays up" on the plane and your was actually down!
When someone gives you a hand and it's applause, not help up out of your chair.
Nasty oozing rash = A KODAK MOMENT.
You don't even NOTICE the shock of horror on everyone's face when you turn to your spouse in a public place and exclaim that you are about to DUMP.
Wooden spoon = post-op pooper scooper!
When your Dr. looks you in the eye and says, "I know you will be a success at this."
When having sex doesn't require having to slap the thighs and ride the wave in???
When your boyfriend/spouse starts gaining weight because of eating your leftovers.
When you can run up a flight of stairs and aren't even panting a little!
When you are laying flat on your back and realize that the bulges in your armpits are where your boobs have gone.
When you leave a piece of you wherever you go (hair).
When you realize that you are no longer the "big girl" in the office
You can't wait to wake up and start your day.
You are having sex and your husband complains of your hip bones poking him.
Your butt gets tired of sitting because you have no padding.
You can sit cross-legged on the floor and you show everyone who will look.
You can wear corduroy pants without starting small fires behind you!
Being able to do Taebo without being winded... but pilates kick your butt
Running into old flames, and saying "Do I know you?"
You look forward to flirting with the new cute phlebotomist at your doctor's office.
Your clothes fall off in a public place and your scream for joy, not embarrassment
You go out to eat and ask if anyone wants to split a kids meal with you
You have clothes left at the alterations place for months, because every time you go in to try them on, they are still too big and have to be taken in again
"Cheating" means eating three crackers
You stop ordering combo meals because you are not allowed to have the soda
You stop looking for minimizer bras, and start buying water bras!
When people you know but haven't seen since before surgery DON'T know you!
When you wave and your upper arms wave back
When you walk backwards no one feels the need to make a beeping sound
When your daughter says, "mommy - when I grow up I want to have long, hangy down, pointy boobies just like you".
You have to safety pin your underwear on (size 14 panties on a size 6 butt)
You've ever eaten (and enjoyed) pureed tuna
Having your neighbor think your husband had gotten a divorce and married someone thin!
You turn on the morning show JUST to see Al Roker!
Before your surgery, it's all you can talk about...After your surgery, it's all everyone else can talk about!!
You are actually bold enough to admit your weight, and even post it on the internet!!!
You can eat 1/4 of a chicken breast and feel like you just finished Thanksgiving dinner.
You actually look forward to stepping on the scale!
You are not embarrassed of anything that you have in your buggy at the supermarket!
You have a wingspan larger than an airplane...LOL!!
Your co-workers are getting diet tips from you instead of vice versa!
When it doesn't take your breath away to roll over in bed.
When you're no longer embarrassed to tell people you weigh 200 pounds
Being able to hang clothes in the closet without them falling off the hanger
Looking for protein everything
Having your children take your food because you are full not the other way around
Not afraid of the elevator because of weight limit
Cannot only blame the cat for shedding
When after a night on the town with some support group friends you go out to breakfast, order 1 meal, and split it 4 ways! And once you have finished eating, there's still a half of each quarter portion left on each plate!
When you are the one (instead of your husband) that blames that terrible odor on the dog!
When your pet needs a gastric bypass because you feed it all your leftovers!
You leave Costco feeling like you've left an all you can eat buffet (all those free samples!)
When food tastes the same coming up as it did going down and water is still cold coming up!
When you call Lane Bryant and cancel your credit card.
When you race to your scale for a quick fix instead of your fridge?
When Crystal Lite is too sweet for your taste buds
When you spend more time reading product labels than you do any books.
When you spend a day in your room trying on clothes you shoved to the back of the closet
When your belly doesn't touch your knees but instead your boobs do
When researching plastic surgery for your TT, boobs, arms, thighs becomes a near olympic event
When you say "OMG I LOOOOOVE chocolate" and you are referring to a protein shake and not a box of Fanny Mae or Ethel M's
You buy 3 Lean Cuisines a week...and that's your total groceries.
Your rings keep spinning around your fingers
The kids wonder what happened to the cookie and cake god...did he die???
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8~3~03
I found this letter on www.gastricbypassfamily ~ I think I will use it to begin discussions with my sister about it. She is the only person close to me that had a negative reaction when I told her I was considering surgery...
Letter to Significant others
I want to talk to all the husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, boyfriends, girlfriends or any other "significant other." If your loved one has asked you to read this section, congratulations on doing so. I have gone through, and survived, what you are probably experiencing now and know that I can offer some words that will help you to deal with it.
About two years ago, our family doctor recommended that my wife see a nutritionist about her weight. The nutritionist suggested several plans for her to lose weight, most of which were the standard: more exercise, better eating habits, identifying why people eat emotionally, and taking prescribed weight loss medication. One of the suggestions, however, was for her to have weight loss surgery. I was shocked. How could this man come up with this? Does he really know what he is talking about?
My reactions then, were probably the same as your reactions now. I know what most every one of you was thinking when your loved one told you that he or she was considering weight loss surgery. I can hear your thoughts and your words now as I am writing this.
"This is a major operation!" "You are perfectly healthy!" "You could die!!" "What about the family?" "What about just one more diet?" "You are not THAT overweight!" "How can they say that you are morbidly obese?" "Why do something that will change your life forever?"
I could go on and on. How do I know what went through your mind? I know because I had the very same thoughts and emotions. I think that anyone who finds out that their loved one is "volunteering" to undergo such a serious operation is naturally concerned about the consequences of such a drastic procedure. I use the word "volunteering" because at that time, I did not fully understand the "need" for the operation. I was worried about how this operation would change her life. I was worried about how she would feel when we would go out to dinner with friends or when she attended a work related function that was centered around food. I was worried about the fact that some surgeon was going to literally change her insides. Cut some parts here. Reconnect some parts there. This surgeon was actually going to re-route my wife's intestines to places that God never thought about. I was horrified. I was scared. I was speechless. And with all my worry for how this would change my wife's life, I also wondered how this would change my own life and our family. How could I eat in front of her without making her feel bad about not being able to eat more? How could we go out for dinner and a movie? How would I go on if she had complications and died? It is amazing how many thoughts go through your head when you are panicking about the health of your loved one.
After I got over the initial shock, I was able to think a little more rationally and talked over the options with Barbara. After hearing what she had to say, I still could not accept the fact that she needed such a serious procedure. After much discussion, I talked her into trying another diet. I would help. I would go on a diet with her. I would do anything to avoid the operation. Being the wonderful person she is, she agreed to try one more time. She went on another diet and watched what she ate. She went to nutrition classes. She exercised. She did all the things that the nutritionist originally suggested except for the surgery. She did lose weight but she was not happy and was in constant pain from her back. This is when I started to learn about something called "Co-morbidities."
Many times when people are overweight, there are usually other problems happening now or problems that will develop in the future. My wife was in a car accident many years ago and has had back pain ever since. The increased weight on her body was not allowing her to live life without pain. Some days the pain was less. Some days the pain was more severe. But there was always pain. This additional problem that is associated with the weight is called co-morbidity. Being overweight makes a person vulnerable to many other problems like diabetes, high blood pressure, heart attacks and something called sleep apnea, when the person actually stops breathing when they sleep. She didn't have any of these other problems then, but being overweight made her a prime candidate for developing these problems in the future.
Another problem that is not classed as co-morbidity is "quality of life." My wife was not happy about her weight problem and the ever- present back pain. She missed going shopping with our daughter, Erin, because she could only walk for a short time at the malls. She felt bad that she could never fit into the slinky outfits that she wore many years ago. She loves playing golf, but her back would be screaming at her after playing only nine holes. Playing 18 holes of golf was absolutely out of the question. She was taking prescribed and over-the-counter pain medication, going to a chiropractor several times a week, and even got treated several times at a pain center at a local hospital. She was told that the treatments would give her some temporary relief but would not cure her problem, as long as she was heavy.
The turning point for me to accept weight loss surgery was one day when I found my wife in the kitchen and in especially great pain. She was crying and sitting in a chair with her head hanging low. She looked up at me with her beautiful blue eyes that were now red and full of tears, and said that she was tired of being in pain all the time and wanted to go ahead with the surgery. My heart melted. I looked her in the eyes and I knew in that moment that we were about to take a new direction in our lives. I could not continue to see the person I love most in this world, in so much pain and I could see that weight loss surgery was the only way to ever find an end to her misery.
My wife had the pain, but your loved one may only be overweight. My use of the word "only' should not be taken as an indication that there is not a grave problem. To be considered for weight loss surgery, the patent is normally 100 pounds or more over their ideal weight. We have a cat and buy kitty litter in 33 pound containers. To get a full appreciation of what an extra 100 pounds feels like, try strapping three of those containers to your belt. Now spend a couple of hours trying to live your life. I would not be surprised if you gave up after only a few minutes.
As the years go by and the person you love gets heavier and heavier, (which is typically what happens), co-morbidities will surely develop. At some point, you and your loved one will be faced with the horrendous fact that the weight will never come off with conventional means, and the quality of life will deteriorate to the point that there will be a spiral down hill to early death. With every passing day you will notice only small changes and think that there is not a big problem. But things will be slowly getting worse until one day there will be a terrible disaster. It is absolutely critical that something be done to manage the weight problem and it must be done now. Any further delay will only add to your loved one's misery and mounting health problems.
If weight loss surgery has been recommended to your loved one, I urge you from the bottom of my heart, to open your mind to the seriousness of the problem. Make an effort to educate yourself about all aspects of the surgery. Keep in mind that your loved one is in physical and emotional misery and desperately needs your help.
8-13-03
Well I gave my sister the letter posted above to significant others. I hadn't talked with her about the surgery since I told her I was considering it 8 months ago. I didn't get a good response so I never brought up the topic again with her. But I felt it was time to do so since I was to have my surgeon consultation tomorrow. I explained to her that I had prayed about this and had done a tremendous amount of research and it was something I wanted to do for me to be able to live a healthier life. She understood and said she would support me 100%. That was good to know. I felt bad that everyone else knew but her. I didn't want her to worry for 6-8 months before I even knew if I would get approved. I meet with the surgeon tomorrow, I'm not quite sure what to expect.
8~14~03
I met with Dr. Anez today. He is as great as everyone has said all along, very thorough in his explanation of the surgery complete with booklet for further reference. He explained everything in layman's terms and assured me that he and his staff would take very good care of me. I also told him that he received rave reviews from every source that I inquired of. Even when I got to his office, the patients in the waiting room were also raving about him. His office is supposed to call next week to talk with me about a surgery date!! I can't wait, I'm so excited. Also I found out that I got a promotion on yesterday, so I will be starting a new job in September!! August has been a good month, even though I found out today that I have gained 4 lbs. Award on Friday, new job on Wednesday and surgery date scheduled next week. God is Good!!
PS - I forgot to add that Dr. Anez said that Kaiser kept their patients very well informed about the surgery. As much as some of us complain about Kaiser insurance and how long their process is for getting surgery approval, I must admit that I walked away from the process with no questions about the surgery and what to do/expect afterwards. So that 6 months waiting period where you meet with the nutritionist is well worth it, by that time all of your doubts, fears and questions are resolved. We start off wanting to get it done right away but when the time comes, I have read that people are often afraid when approval happens fast. So all you Kaiser patients out there continue to be encouraged and patient it all works out in the end and remember you are always closer to the end of the journey than you were the first day you started the journey. Guess this is a long PS :)
~8-26-03
I GOT MY DATE, I GOT MY DATE, I GOT MY DATE. Can I say how happy I am. Whew, an 8 month process and I got my date!! I really want to jump up and do a Happy Dance, but I'm afraid the people at work would want to know why. Who cares that I just smashed up my side mirror on the van at lunch time and it'll probably cost and arm and a leg to fix!! I got a date!! I guess I should say what it is huh? Drum roll please.........................OCTOBER 16, 2003!! Just about a month and a half away. Woohoo!! Thanks to my AMOS family for tremendous support. Keeping posting those before and after pics because it sure helps with the waiting process. One day soon, I'll have some of my own. 9-23-03 ~ 22 Days and counting. Now I am going through mixed feelings about the surgery none of which will change my mind about the surgery, but just about having surgery in general and the risks involved. I believe that this is something God would have me do and I believe that he will bring me through this process. I start my pre op tests this week, I have to have an Arterial Blood Gas test (I have no idea what that is) and a Pulmonary Function Test, a whole host of lab work, a gall bladder sonogram, and an EKG. I had an EKG in December, so I need to call the doctor's office to see if they will take that one. I am still excited but also in preparation mode. I just ordered my protein shake mix - NECTAR - I love that stuff. However, I am looking for some iron supplement alternatives. Does anyone know of like liquid iron you could take? Well, I better get ready for work, I just wanted to come here and check my countdown clock. 22 more days and I'm a loser - WOW!! I can't wait!
9~25~03 Well 2 pre op tests down and just a few more to go. Today was the first time I'd ever been inside Fair Oaks Hospital. I had ABG test done today and a pulmonary. The Labe guy was great and made me almost forget that he was putting a large needle in my artery. I'm so excited about this surgery. I am coordinating a friends wedding and I have to buy one more plus size dress. I really didn't want to buy any clothes until after the surgery, but I can't fit anything that I already have in my closet that's formal. Someone will be getting blessed with a worn only one time formal outfit. I have more testing on Tuesday and I think I'll go to the Kaiser lab this weekend and get the blood work done. So close to my new life!! By the way, I don't have an angel if anyone is interested and read this profile.
9-27-03~ Lab test complete today along with required chest xray. Neither were bad, just 4 tubes of blood drawn, urine sample (hadn't had to do that in a long time) and a chest xray for the first time. I'll have my gall bladder sonogram and something else on Tuesday then I'll be done. I went to the mall today to look for an outfit for the wedding, oh how I hate the mall but needed to pass the time while the van was getting an oil change at jiffy lube. I could find nothing in my size in the colors I wanted or they were just entirely too pricey. The wedding is next Saturday and I haven't a thing to wear - I'm sure I'll find something. I just don't want to spend a lot of money on something I can only wear once.
Found out that my dad was admitted to the hospital. He's in Chicago and they're still running tests. He's 70 and had been losing weight rapidly and has been losing red blood cells. Please keep him in your prayers. It's about 1am and I'm usually not up this time of night, but I took a nap earlier today, I think I was tired earlier because I am anemic and they took blood today.
I also found out that I have tohave another EKG done, so that's scheduled for Tuesday too. Well, signing off to go look at before and after pics which always brings me so much joy. Take care AMOS family. 19 days and counting
9-29-03 Well I finally told my supervisor that I'm having surgery. I started a new job and have only been here a month and didn't know how to tell the new office I was having surgery. I still didn't tell them the kind of surgery, but that I would need to be out of the office for 3-4 weeks. Fortunately, I have enough leave to cover that time. They were very understanding and it was a great relief to know that.
Tomorrow I go for my Gall bladder sonogram, Upper GI, and an EKG. Then my pre op testing will be complete. I meet again with the surgeon's office next week. I can't believe my date is still around the corner. Sometimes I have butterflies about it, but never enough to change my mind about the surgery.
I talk with my brother a lot about the things I'll be able to do again. He is a staunch supporter and plans to help me with an exercise routine. He even wants me to try running - we'll see. He understands that it won't be right away, but who knows what lies ahead in the very near future.
I ended up finding a very nice outfit in my closet to wear to the wedding this weekend that I can actually fit and it's the right color. I won't have to buy shoes either, so that's great. It doesn't fit as well as it used to but I shouldn't have to worry about seams splitting either. I'm just glad that I didn't have to buy another plus size dress that I would only wear a few times. Well, I'll update later about the rest of my tests.
10-1-03 ~ The serious countdown begins. 15 days and counting. Well I the protein shake mix I ordered came in the mail - oh how I love NECTAR. It's the best protein shake I've tasted. I finished all my pre op testing yesterday. That upper gi test is no joke. I was able to stomach the barium, but it was all that flipping around in the contraption that got me. I guess the doctor was trying to shake up the barium in my stomach. I think that was the most interesting of all the tests I had. Now the key will be getting the various offices to fax my results to the surgeon's office. My PCP's aide said she would take care of it once my chest xray results were in. I am still very much looking forward to having the surgery. Just trying to tie up loose ends as I am a mother of 3 boys, 1 in college, 1 in high school, and 1 in middle school and a husband who of course all have very busy lives and I'm usually right at the center. I am also looking forward to not working for a few weeks, even though my job is new, I just feel run down, so I'm hoping to come back refreshed, rejuvenated, and reduced in body size :) The next thing on the list is to have the nurse's interview on Friday, October 3rd and meet with the surgeon's office on next October 9th, to make sure all the ducks are in a row. I'm still excited, it feels good to be so close. I can't wait to be able to fit into the clothes I already have in my closet and to get rid of some of the aches and pains I sometimes feel. Well, till next time, I'm signing off.
10-11-03 ~ It's been a week since I've been here. In that time I have acquired a great angel Cynthia Dutra. I call her My sweet angel or Angel girl - you know, like touched by an angel. Well, my dad passed away on the 2nd and we had to go to Chicago (where I"m from) this week. He was 70. The services were good, there is just a a feeling a peace when you know a loved one is gone on to be with the Lord. No more suffering here on earth. We just got back this morning. While I was away I found out that my surgery was postponed to November 4th, which acutally works much better for me. Since during my time off, some holidays fall in there and I won't have to use as much leave. Also my husband just told me he thinks we should get a divorce. It has not been real happy for quite some time and right now I think I am just numb from it it all. I know that God will take care of me and will continue to provide for me and my children as he always had. There's been no cheating or nothing like that, but I think we are just not the ones for each other. I love this forum it just helps you get stuff off your chest. Thanks all my AMOS buddies. Keep me in your prayers. In the meantime, I'm just going rest in the Master's arms as I ride through this storm. Love ya!
10-21-03 ~ Ok so 13 days and counting - yes I am counting down again. My blood count has risen 2.5 points and I'm only about 2 points away from being normal. I have to get more blood test done next week and hopefully all goes well so I can keep my surgery date of November 4th. All the other tests checked out fine. I'm still checking the before and after pics of everyone that is like the biggest encouragement for me. I hope you guys keep posting and I'll be sure to do that too once I cross over to the other side. I can't wait. I don't even want to buy a new winter coat because I know I won't be able to wear it long. I did have to buy a couple of pair of boots though cuz it seemed all my shoes had my toes out from the summer. So maybe they'll just fit better. I started packing some of my summer clothes that will be too big next summer to give them away to a friend. A lot of them I just bought this summer because we went to the Virgin Islands. Thank you to all who read my profile, check up on me and send me well wishes.
10-22-03 ~ Okay, tell me why the clerk at the vitamin shoppe knew I was having WLS?!! I was in there to buy iron pills so he began asking me questions about whether I was anemic or not. I said yeah, so he asked me to pull down my bottom eyelid and then stated that I was just a little anemic. What a weird experience. Can someone really tell you're anemic by looking at your eyes?!! And I guess only overweight people that come shopping for vitamins are the ones having surgery or have had the surgery. It just all took me by surprise, so I thought I would share it here.
10-29-03 Okay 6 days and counting. Tomorrow I have my blood count checked again, but I have been popping my iron pills regularly and I think I'll be ok. Getting excited now. 6 days to my new life. I am one of the people who has been trying to eat everything I won't be able to eat after surgery. The last thing on my list is the jack daniels chicken from TGIFridays and some Blueberry pancakes from Bob Evans :) 3 more days of work - whew. I think this week is flying by. I'll check back in soon. I'm still loving all those before and after pics. Keep posting everyone.<
10-30-03 ~ 5 days and counting. I met with my Pastor today to tell him I was moving, getting a divorce and having surgery. I really wish everyone could have a Pastor like mine. He was great, very supportive, understanding, prayerful, and encouraging. I have such a loving church family. My bible study group will be preparing meals for my family once a week while I am recovering. If anyone is in the northern virginia area, visit our church. Our website is www.mtpleasantbaptist.org
Well, I went to get my blood test today, I guess the final results will be in tomorrow. I think it will be fine. I didn't even feel the needle and the blood filled the tube much faster than it ever has. I'm getting excited. It just occurred to me yesterday that I need to start packing a bag to take with me. At least take some slippers and a portable cd player or something. I'm praying for an uneventful surgery and painless recovery. The quest for surgery approval is coming to an end and my new WL journey begins.
11-3-03 ~ Wow 19 hours left until surgery - I'm excited again!! I'm hoping to be home by the weekend though, because I'd like to make an appearance at the Teen Crusade Saturday night. We'll see if I'm up to it or not. I have all my vitamins, protein shake mix, what I think I'll eat when I get home. I can't imagine feeling full after 1-2 ounces of food. I'm going to re-read all of my information just so I can be on top of things. Wow - I'm so excited. I'm going to look at the newest before and after pics!! Talk with you as soon as I can. Smooches to my AMOS family.
11-10-03 ~I AM A LOSER! I AM A LOSER!! Normally I would never call myself that, but I have made it to the other side. Wow, I still can't believe it, but those 13 staples give you a quick reminder that it really happened. I came home Friday after a Tuesday surgery. Everything went fine, except that I was unable to urinate due to anesthesia and morphine and needed a catheter. My first catheter experience. After I got off the IV I was able to pee, all the nurses and my roomate were cheering me on - It was great. I ran into Ernie in the hospital and he was getting a tummy tuck and thigh lift, he wanted me to tell everyone that he is doing good. I guess that's about it for now, off to look at the before and after pics I so love.
11-13-03~ Had my staples removed yesterday I thought it would hurt but it didn't. But the great news is that I lost 14lbs!!! Wow in one week, I can't believe it.
11-17-03 Well, I think I sneezed and split a small part of my incision. On my way to the dr.'s office to get it fixed. I also found out that I took my steri-strips off too soon as well. I"m not in any pain, so that's why I'm not sure when it happened. Will keep you updated.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back from the dr.'s office, he said all was well and it would heal and all I needed to do was keep it clean. That's a relief. The best news is that I've lost another 6 lbs since last Wednesday with I was there which brings my weight loss to a grand total of 20lbs in 2 weeks!!! WOW!1-6-04 ~ I hadn't realized it has been so long since I updated. I hit my 2 month anniversary on Sunday - Wow. I don't know exactly how much I've lost because I don't like getting on my scales at home. I have a digital one and a regular one and they vary by as much as 30 lbs. I can see some weight loss, but my friend says she sees a lot more. She always tells me that I can no longer fit into some of my clothes. I keep trying to get as much wear out of them as I can because they are getting too big. One of my favorite pair of jeans are too big. It's mostly my size 26 clothes that are too big so I have started to pack them away to give to a good friend of mine. A lot of them are new from last fall when I went on a shopping spree because I couldn't fit any of my clothes so I guess that's why I keep trying to wear them. I also was able to fit into my size 22 jeans so maybe I have lost 2 dress sizes. I'll get my official weight tomorrow when I go for my 2 month check up.
I had been struggling with protein, and haven't been drinking it, but I got a sample of Nectar "fuzzy navel" it was pretty good. It's sold at www.wlsuccess.com. I also have the strawberry kiwi which I hated right after surgery. But I drank it this morning. What I have found is that if I don't smell it I can tolerate it. It doesn't taste bad at all, the smell just gets me.
We're all settled in the new house and it feels like home. I can tell I have way more energy, I can walk farther and do more things. I made a headboard for my bed last week out of two canvasses and batting and fabric - it looks beautiful. I also painted a small table and did some stenciling. I was very proud of myself. I am finding now though that I need to stay busy and keep myself occupied to avoid feeling lonely since we are getting a divorce. We were together for 7 years, so it's been a long time since I've been alone. I do have a friend who just got divorced and he and I spend a lot of time on the phone, I guess being distractions for each other, he lives out of town though. We've decided that in a year when we get ourselves together and emotionally stable we will go on a date. I'm thinking I might go see a pyschologist to help get through the emotions of divorce and the emotions of WLS. I liked the woman I went to see for approval of WLS, so I think I'll make an appointment with her.
I did the Tae Bo basic work out last night, I made it able half way through. Yippie-that's a great start. I guess I'm weird because I want to build up my stamina before going back to the gym. I'm praying to figure out a gym routine I will stick with. I really don't want to have flabby arms or thighs, I'm hoping to be able to tone that up and just have a tummy tuck when it's time. I guess I've rambled on enough - I'll keep you updated on my progress. I remember how important it is for pre ops to read because it sure help me reading everyone's journal. Good luck pre ops - it still is the best decision I ever made for myself. I haven't been sick once. Just take your vitamins and follow the doctors orders. Take Care.
1-8-04 ~ Well I tried to post something last night but it didn't work - Anyway drum roll please.....New weight loss total 42lbs in 2 months YAHOOOOOOO!!!. I find myself watching all these weight loss commercials saying "I lost 5 lbs in 3 weeks" I'm like "so what I lost 42 lbs and it's not over yet!!" Those commercials don't cater to significant weight loss needs anyway.
Thanks to all of you who continue to read my profile. I'm trying to get pics taken once a month to eventually post when I am skinny. :) I still love looking at all the before and after pics of everyone, it's so motivational.
I'll be sure to keep updating, especially for the pre ops - I know how beneficial reading profiles are - please email me with any questions or concerns. Yes it's the best thing I have ever done for myself and it's still early. 1-12-04 ~ I know that I am only 2 months out, but yesterday I had a "fat" day. I felt fat for the 1st time since surgery. I don't know, maybe I ate too much. Yes, I am a couple of sizes down, I just packed up a bag of clothes to give away, yet I felt fat. Anyway, I hope it passes. I wanted everyone to know that tried the Nectar protein again, and I am able to drink it - so I've been finally getting my protein in these last few days. I think it helps to make small weekly goals, so this week mine is to get my protein in in the morning. Well just wanted to check in. Pre ops keep your head up and post ops keep striving.1-21-04 ~ This past weekend I rode in an airplane for the first time since surgery and guess what THE SEAT BELT FIT WITH ROOM TO SPARE!! I even was able to sit with both arm rest down comfortably. I went to visit my friend in Detroit and boy was it good just to get away from everyday life for a few days. He noticed the weight loss, and that made me feel good. Today a coworker asked if I was losing weight. No one in my office knows what kind of surgery I had. I said "maybe, but I don't get on the scales to know for sure" -(snicker, snicker) I'm feeling good these days and am even getting my protein in. I started going to the gym at work and this week will have them put together a work out routine for me. I actually rode the recumbent bike at my friends house this weekend when I was out of town. I'm feeling great. My friend had surgery yesterday, I'm going to see her today. I'm going to check out her page to see if anyone has sent well wishes.
1-27-04 ~ Woo hoo!! 10 lbs lost in 20 days!! I was going to wait until my next dr. appt before weighing, but I met with the director at the gym at work for him to put together a work out routine for me and he had to take my weight. I really wanted to jump up and down because of the 10 lbs, but I didn't. I did end of telling him that I had the surgery. He said he did not agree with the surgery, and I told him it didn't matter it was already done. So we went through all the machines in the gym and set up the proper weights for me. I actually enjoy going and now I know I'll be doing the routine properly instead of all "willy nilly". Plus I have two work out buddies at work and that always helps. I missed two days of the gym this week, but did the Tae Bo 8 minute workout those two days at home. I am a little sore, but it feels good. I have so much more energy, I'm hoping to be able to run by the summer. I am also hoping to reach 100lb loss by the 6 month mark.
I'm having a hard time giving up my clothes. I still want to wear them, but anytime you can stick your whole arm down your pants and they aren't elastic waist, I guess that means they are too big - lol. Anyway, I am very happy with my progession thus far and I'm hoping because I dont weigh but once a month that I miss any early plateaus. Keep your head up pre ops - it really is worth it.~3-1-04 Okay, I guess I skipped the whole month of February without an update. I'm still trying not to get on my scales at home because they just seem not to be accurate. But I got on the fancy scale at the gym which records body mass, fat mass weight and everything and prints out a receipt. I've lost another 8lbs since 2/5/04 and I am gaining muscle - woo hoo!! My grand total is 60lbs lost in about 4 months. I'll be 4 months out on Thursday! I wanted to make 100lbs gone in 6 months, but I'm not sure how realistic that is to lost 40lbs in two months - oh well as long as I am still losing. Sometimes I can see a difference and sometimes I can't. Thanks to a good friend who brings me clothes because I obviously don't know what size I wear. Today I am in a size 18 everything!! It's hard to believe I have a 1 in front of my size. I was wearing 24/26 in November. I just discovered I could fit 18 last night when my friend brought over some clothes. I guess this is normal - but I don't know - any thoughts post ops? Anyway, I'm working out 3-5 times a week at the gym - getting my protein drinks in and loving honey dew melons these days. Keep pushing pre ops - it's still the best thing I could have done for myself- not one day of dumping either!!
3-20-04
Yesterday I finally realized that I can fit a size 18 clothes!! Woo hoo -down from size 24/26. I can't believe it. I am working on getting some updated photos posted. I had to really look at some before pics because when I look in the mirror I don't always see the weight loss, but it's over 60 lbs at this point. As you know I stay away from the scales until absolutely necessary. I'm hoping this helps when/if I experience plateaus so I won't know about them and get discouraged. This surgery is STILL the best thing I have ever done for myself - now if I can only mentally accept that I look good - and not worry about the haters - I'll be good to go.
5-2-04 ~ I know I know, updates are getting fewer. Well in 2 days I will have reached my 6 month anniversary. Things are still going well. I can eat much more than I could a few months ago and more variety. I still limit breads and I haven't eaten rice or pasta since I had the surgery. I wanted to have lost 100 lbs by 6 months, but 75 is nothing to sneeze at either. I am still happy. Most of size 18 clothes are very loose but I don't have any 16s in my closet - besides my one "goal" outfit that I'll be wearing to my sister's graduation in two weeks. I go for a check up this week, hopefully my bloodworks comes out great. I posted an updated pic on my refrigerator on my profile. That seems to be easier than going through AMOS. I'll wait until 100lbs are gone and then post on the before and after. I am halfway to my goal. I thought I wanted to lose 150 lbs, but I really would just like to be able to wear a size 10 clothes. I'm not sure I want to be smaller than that. But who knows, I've never been smaller than that!! Well, I just wanted to update and continue to wish the pre ops following my progress to keep your eyes focused on the prize and continue to be patient. This surgery will change your life, but it's up to you to change the inside. Also, I've started dating again!! I'll keep you posted. Take care until next time.
5-7-04 ~ I wanted to update to let you know that all my bloodwork from my 6 months check up came back great except for my iron. I'm still anemic, but only slightly now even though I take 125 mg of iron daily. I will continue to work on it and see what happens. I lost 1 lb since I weighed at the end of the month so I am now down from 307 to 231. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself once I get under 200lbs. I can't even remember the last time I was there. Hopefully, it'll happen by August. I have some terrific news I GOT A 10% RAISE JUST BECAUSE!! It isn't review time or anything and government usually don't give arbitrary raises, but my boss put in a request because I have been doing the work of 2 people and it got approved - I didn't even know she had put in the request!! I wanted to shout, I could hear the church shout music in the back of my head, but I had to remain professional!! Talk about a happy camper, this felt almost as good as getting approved for surgery. God is good - ALL THE TIME!! It's funny though the people from my old office barely recognize me and all I hear all the time is "you look really good" "did you change your hair" I say yes :) Now people are beginning to ask what I am doing, I just say I go to the gym often and my clothes are beginning to get loose. They don't know I've lost 6 dress sizes. Almost everyone in this office is a size 4 or 6, so to them I'm still fat I guess. I don't want to be a size 4 or 6 though a 10 or 12 works just fine for me. I've also started to date. I've met a couple of nice guys we'll see what happens!! Keep your head up pre -ops I'm so looking forward to summer!!
6-4-04~ I just popped in to say that last night as my son and I walked the trail to get to the fair, I noticed my shadow and thought to myself, my shadow is really small. Oh the little things that make us happy.
6-5-04~Guess what??!! I walked in the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer 5K walk today!! The great thing about this beside it's a worthy cause is that when I did the walk 2 years ago my body was devastated. I could hardly walk for about 3-4 days later, but today I am barely sore. Even my ankle that I broke 10 years ago that sometimes gives me trouble. We walked in the rain and were drenched, but it felt so good just to be able to do it without hurting or even feeling winded. One more small step of accomplishment - it sure feels good! My next goal is to play flag football in a couple of weeks. I'll keep you posted. 7-15-04 ~ So everyone is noticing the weight loss. I still haven't admitted to the people in the office that I had surgery, they just think I work out, but everywhere I go now, people see the difference. Even the people at church that I see every week. I'm now in a regulation size 16 - you know the ones without the infamous "W" behind them. I actually tried on a size 14 formal halter because I'm the matron of honor at my friend's wedding in November and it fit great. And I bought 2 size 12/14 shirts (from Walmart) that fit great too. It's time to replenish the underwear though. I'm afraid one day they will fall completely off. It's even time to get new bras. It's time to get weighed again at the gym too, I'm hoping maybe at least another 8-10lbs will be gone from last month. We're thinking of starting a support group at church because there are at least a handful of us who has had the surgery and more considering it. My oldest sister in Chicago is planning to have the surgery too - it'll be good for her because she has so many medical conditions. Anyway, I just wanted to update for all of you beautiful people who take the time to read my profile. Thank you, and I hope every now and again I write something that helps you with your decision. I also posted some new pics in my profile that I took earlier this week cuz I thought I looked good in my red suit!! 8-10-04 Ok, talk about estatic!! I had my 9 month check up today and I am officially a member of the Century Club!! Exactly 100lbs lost - forever!!! Can I say how excited I am?!!! My scale at home didn't say that, so I purposely didn't eat anything all day until my appointment. Dr. Anez said I was his favorite patient - I'm sure he says that to all the girls - but all the lab work was fine and he said I was doing great and to keep doing what I'm doing. Little did he know I've only been to the gym twice in two weeks. I must get back on schedule. I am in a wedding in November and I'd like to get some definition to these arms. Once again, it's always great to sit in the waiting room and listen to stories, and tell your story to all the pre ops. I remember having so many questions. And yes, 9 months later it is still the best thing I could have ever done for me. Everyday I get compliments. The best ones are from my sisters at church. Some have found my page here and it blesses my heart to know posting encourages or touches someone else. I remember coming here everyday prior to surgery, but it's true what they all say - you are out enjoying life instead of hiding in front of a computer screen. But we still must make time to post, because it's the encouragement you get from this site that keeps you motivated and pushing forward. Thanks for sharing in my joy - 7lbs left and I won't have a 2 in front of my weight anymore. I can't even remember that far back - lol. Please feel free to email me at any time with questions. Keep pushing (Praying Until Something Happens)pre-ops - your day will come.
9-17-04 ~ Ok, I know I must get better about updating. I just went to look at the before and after pictures and I must say I still enjoy them very much. Let's see, I have energy beyond belief now. Last night I raced my 17 year old in the parking lot of my brother's house and then walked up 4 flights of stairs right afterward - and guess what - I didn't pass out. I am still amazed at my stamina. I am still working out at the gym 3-4 days a week - really concentrating on my arms so I can have some definition before my friends wedding in November - they are coming along nicely - I get comments that people think I actually have muscles - I don't see it - but if they do, that just means it's working. I currently wear a size large tops and extra large bottoms - that's still amazing. I picked up a 2xl belt last night in walmart only to discover it really doesn't fit at all. I didn't buy it. However, I really need shoes - no more toes out - summer is over.
I went to the beach last weekend and was able to ride a bike the entire length of the board walk - and not be winded at all. I'm not sure if I've lost anymore weight since my last weigh in - scared to get on the scale because the next time I get on I want to see a "1" as the first number. But my current weight loss of 100 lbs is nothing to sneeze at either.
I will post some pictures soon, we took some at the beach. Take care - and pre-ops - your day will come.
11-9-06 3 years post op and I hardly ever visit the site
anymore. So much so that I didn't know they had changed the layout of the si
