My first memory of a weight issue was when I was in first grade. I remember being larger and taller then all my classmates. By third grade I knew I was 'fat' by definition of my peers and comments from the family. Although my family meant well, diet and food were a controlling factor of my life. By the time I was in Junior High, I tried to compensate for my lack of self esteem by focusing on academics and music. As much as I tried to forget my own frustrations, I could not let go of the my own perception that I was and would always be a large framed person. My mother was very weight conceinions and always attempted to teach me about portion control, nutritional values and low fat meals. However, this emphasis only drove me further into a depression about my physical apperance. By my teenager years, little comments about my weight and clothing became a dreaded reminder of my idea of failure. I was not me.... I had an idea of who I could and should be, but I could never see my way through to the truth... I was me!
Now I am a mother of 5--- 3 biological and 2 step children. I keep very busy with teaching and parenting. I am involved in church and dedicate my time to my family. With my hetic schedule and lack of me time... I have decided... I want and will be ME!