Pizza, Tacos, Coffee, Ice cream...

Oct 18, 2010

 I feel like a roller coaster of emotions. I feel GREAT... I don't feel hungry, but I have to learn to emotionally ignore food. I only have until
Thursday and I will have my post op appointment. I am hoping at that point I can at least to a full liquid diet. Just when I am focusing on my intake, protien, and doing well.... hmmmmmm I smell Pizza!! I could so easily just sit down and eat a piece! But I am not going to I have control... it is just the thought as I watch the family eat. I warm up my broth... and sit down at the table sticking to my limits.
I told my hubby that God must really want me to keep focused, because Tacos and Pizza are some of my favorites. Proudly I have done very well!
This morning the smell of coffee filled the house while the sound of the pot brewing, my tastebuds began to water. OH... I can have coffee, to get me going, just as I have before. The challange.... I can live without the milk, but how am I going to sweeten it? I pour a cup, add some splenda-- take a taste...  I despise the after taste... I pour the coffee out-- making a new cup, I start to grab some dry creamer thinking... hmmm maybe I can add just a little. I look at the daughters walk in and say..."Mom... you can't do that no milk products."
Caught, in the action, I retreat. I now try to sweeten the coffee with Stevia.... I take a taste--- hmmmm this might work. I take it into the living room take a few more sips and finally decide I will have to wait for my coffee...

One of my goals was to get thru the surgery with no complications.....this goal is MET!
Another goal was to be a role model for my daughters and sons.... I believe this goal is occuring....
We sat down to dinner and my youngest daughter just finished her drink.  ( Caprisun) I told her that it is healthier to drink water and it will fill her up. I told her that sometimes our body feeels hungry, but really it is thirsty-- so drinking water might help her feel full. She finished her taco and then drank a glass of water... she then said
.."Mom your right! The water made me full, I don't need to have another taco. The water helped- Mommy I want to be like you and drink lots of water."   

 I've decided not to look at the scale, as I do not want to focus on my weight... but be more alert to my healthy lifestyle. It seems that when I look at the scale I only get depressed... Even when I lose weight, I don't really feel an inner excitment.... never have, so I will not focus on the " What if's or I should have's or I could be's of life.." I will be proud of my efforts to have an newlifestyle.
It took me so long to get to this point emotionally.... I am glad for the changes in my life... as I will learn from all of them!

My greatest concerns about this surgery was the opino
ns... but all is going well. I cried today, when I recieved a card from my grandmother... something so simple... but meaningful. She is PROUD of me... brought tears to my eyes. How I love my family and I want nothing more than thier support.
Occasionally there are comments made or jokes that I take personally, but I realize this is NOT about them... IT IS ABOUT and FOR ME.


About Me
Surgery Date
Jun 11, 2010
Member Since

Friends 3

Latest Blog 16