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Well, I can't believe it's been six months since my surgery.  Life has been so different this past 1/2 year.  I now have a BMI of 27.1 and I weigh 168 pounds - down about 76.  My 13 year old son now outweighs me.  I was the biggest in the house; now I'm the smallest.
There's been some anxiety issues.  Just learning how to cope with issues that come up.  Prior to surgery, I'd run to the sweet, gooey stuff like cinnamon rolls and Snicker bars.  Now, I have to find new ways to deal with stress.  It's been hard, but I am determined to get through it.
Has anyone else felt discomfort when your friends call you "skinny" or "slim"?  It makes me terribly uncomfortable.  I'm not sure why.
I went through a period where my hair was thinning, so I cut it off.  That freaked me out because it made me look like my not-so-nice late mother.  It is starting to grow back so I'm starting to look like me again.
This change has been amazing.  I go shopping and hold an item up, thinking there's no way it's going to fit.  I try it on, and dang if it does!  It is such a miracle.

Well, it's been 4 months today.  In some ways, it seems longer, other times, it seems time has flown by.  I'm most happy that my vocal cord has recovered and that my voice is fully back.  Thank you God for that.
In total:  I have lost 56 pounds.  I have gone from a 22W to a 16, sometimes even a 14.  It's so nice to shop in the "normal" misses department.  There's so many more choices, although it is my opinion that most of today's styles look "trampy".  Maybe I'm just showing my age.  I'm sticking to classic styles.
It's been a very interesting 4 months.  I've not had any problems with nausea or sickness.  I am feeling quite good.  I have noticed that the skin under my arms is sagging and I need to start lifting weights to firm it up.
There's been some hair loss; but not too much.  My hair is thick to begin with so it is not noticeable.  It's actually easier to style now that it has thinned some.  
My doctor has set my goal weight at 137.  I already know that I do not want to go that low.  I am shooting for 157-160.

3/19/07
Well, hopefully, this posting is a bit more cheery than my last one two months ago.  First of all, let me say that the pity party is over, and I AM glad I had this surgery.  

I'm doing very well.  I'm happy to report that my voice is starting to get stronger thanks to a little voice therapy.  That makes me feel so much better about everything.  I just felt so helpless and depressed without my voice.  

I'm down 44 pounds, which puts me at 194.  This is the first time I've been below 200 since the late '80's. 

I've not had any problems except the ones that are my own fault...eating too fast or taking large bites.  Maybe after 500 times, I'll get the hint!  I've been on a selling frenzy, posting my clothes on ebay.  I'm committed now as I have no "fat clothes" left in my closet!  My seller name is debbie119 if you care to see what I have for sale.

We started a Paris support group last month.  Our next meeting is 3/26.  I would like to invite anyone in and around Paris to join us at the Rhea Library on the 4th Monday of the month at 6:30 PM. 

I will post new measurements and photos after 3/20, me 3 month anniversary.

1/21/07

It's now been one month since my surgery.  Honestly, at this point, I regret doing it.  Here are the reasons why:
1.  My voice has not returned.  I found out Friday that my left vocal cord is paralyzed.  One of two things happened during surgery to have caused it.  Either cartlidge dislocation or nerve damage.  Either way, It may be months before it returns, if at all.  My ENT recommended speech therapy.  Not sure what I'm going to do.  I just need to let it sink in right now.  I did not count on the added expense I will have to incur going to therapy, etc.  My plans were to return to work as I started to feel better.  We have added living expenses coming up, as my son is about to start driving.  I was going to work to pay for the extra insurance and to help pay for another car.  My son may just have to wait; something I really don't want to tell him as he has waited so long for this.  He shouldn't be punished for my foolish and selfish decision to have this surgery.
2.  I'm cold.  One word of advice I would give others is to have this surgery done during warm weather months.  The weather is absolutely horrible here and I'm stuck inside, wanting to eat.  When I'm drinking fluids, the are mostly cold. 
3.  The emotional grief I'm going through is miserable.  I want so badly to eat.  The stress of my voice problem makes me want to eat more.

Sorry I am such a downer, but this blog is suppose to be honest discussion and that's what I am doing.

1/9/7
It will be three weeks Wednesday morning since my surgery.  Seems like months ago!!  I am down about 22 pounds and I feel wonderful.  My blood pressure is down already and my energy level is up.
I've already got clothes that are too big for me and I am wearing clothes I have not fit into for years.  I went to the consignment store today and found a pair of gray pants, 18W and they fit.  Also, they were on sale for $2.25!  Smaller and cheap!!!
I am eating my protein as much as possible, but I am only able to get in about 2 ozs. per mealtime.  I am supplementing wih protein shakes.
I am so thankful I have not had any real problems except that my voice is still weak.  I see the ENT tomorrow to have that checked out.
Thanks to the Lord for this marvelous blessing.

I am now ten days out of surgery.  Other than a few sore incision sites, I feel pretty much back to normal.  The only real problems I had was with my asthma, and an attempt at getting pneumonia.
I had my one week visit with Dr. Houston on Thursday.  We discussed some of the problems I had; mainly the snippy bahavior of his partner, Dr. Dyer.  He was VERY annoyed at the way Dyer pretty much pushed me off and sent me to the emergency room with no instructions.  I appreciate that he addressed it.  I feel better about Dr. Houston and my problems with them are now behind me.
I still do not have much a voice, and this is really starting to wear on me.  I'm trying to rest it as much as possible, but you know how that goes.
I've not been nauseated at all.  No vomiting, no problems really.  Getting my protein and fluids in pretty good.  And I'm down about 14 pounds.

It's now the day after Christmas.  Yesterday was one of the most emotional day I've ever experienced.  My little jaw is quivering at just the recollection of it.
I am feeling much better and have more energy.  That is not the problem.  It's when the preparation of the Christmas meal began at my in-laws' house.  I love my mom-in-law's Christmas dinner:  Chicken and ham, dressing, sweet potato casserole, hashbrown casserole, corn casserole, tons and tons of rolls, coconut cake, homemade fruit cake.....I took my jello and popcicles with me and sat there with everyone.  I finally had to get  up and go in the hallway and cry.  My sister in law came in and let me cry on her.  Afterward, I could go back and finish.  This experience shows me how much of an emotional attachment I have to food.   Yes, I could have sat in the other room, but I wanted to be with my family.  I also could have chosen to have this done after Christmas, but no.  The situation was my choice; just the beginning of taking back control of my body.

Happy and thinner 2007 to everyone!
My mom-in-law has promised a new wardrobe!

THE STARTING LINE

Weight - 238.0
Neck - 15"
Upper right arm - 15.75"
Right wrist - 6.75"
Chest (under breasts) - 42"
Bust - 48"
Waist - 44"
Hips - 51.5"
Right Thigh - 26"
Right Calf - 17.5"
Right Ankle - 9"

Well, I got home Friday afternoon and it is now Saturday morning.  I'm sore, tired and regretful.  I understand this is normal and that it will pass.
To any of you Tennesseans considering this, I am going to give you one woman's advice:  I am very disappointed with Dr. Houston.  I found him to be hurried and uncaring.  I am considering switching to another doctor at the center.  Houston makes me uncomfortable.  
The staff at Centennial Women's Hospital were very nice and helpful and encouraging; something I was hoping to see in Houston.
I thought it was only Houston, but when I called Dyer, who was on call last night, he was just as bad to my husband. He said Dyer gave the impression that our call was a MAJOR inconvenience.  They're usually a little more well-behaved with a man on the other line. Not this time. Did they not learn in medical school that this was NOT a 9-5 job?
And I'm no rookie when it comes to dealing with docs. I worked in hospitals for years in admissions during college and in Public Relations after college. My mother was a nurse, so I know of what I speak.

I do want to make sure and say that the women who work for these guys are fabulous! They are very caring and kind.


I'm not going to post here that I don't regret this.  It is VERY hard.  The pain is almost intolerable, but I have no choice but to ride it out and get past it.

It's early Sunday morning and as usual, I'm the first one up in my house.  This is my quiet time where I may read my Bible study or just sit and spend time with God.  Of course, I'm thinking about what the upcoming week will have to offer and how I'll be next Sunday as I sit home, post surgery.
I'm excited, nervous...you know, those of you who've been through this know how I'm feeling.
I had the wonderful opportunity to spend Saturday afternoon with Cathy and Mike Spencer (along with their sweet daughter).  They're both 2 years out from their surgery.  Cathy is on my friends list, and I urge you to read her profile.  They were very gracious to share their experiences with me; even the more personal issues.  I cannot begin to tell them thank you enough for their time.  What wonderful people.  I hope to see them again.  Note to Cathy:  I want that dress when you get too small for it!
Afterward, I went out with my Sunday School for dinner and ate a slice of prime rib the size of my head!!!  I'm starting my pre-surgery fasting today so I wanted to go out with a bang!  Along with the prime rib, I had a twice baked potato, green beans with bacon, fried apples, a roll and a big slab of cheesecake.  Man, it was good!!!!  Now, I'm ready to get on with the rest of my life.  Surgery is Wednesday morning and I am ready, both physically and mentally.