Dorota C.

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Whenever I get discouraged, or decide that this daily struggle is just too hard, something happens that opens my eyes anew to all the positive changes in my life that this surgery has allowed me to make.

Maintaining the weight loss is such hard work, and I continue to use food to deal with my stress....although admittedly to a much lesser degree.  But sometimes it makes me question whether I have REALLY changed.....

So my 8 year old son's Mother's Day Gift made me realize that the change I have made affect not only me, but have a lasting effect on those around me as well.

He  wrote me two acrostic poems.
One out of my name (alhough he stuck an extra letter in....)
One out of the word MOM.

Here They are

Daring
Our family to try new things
Rather help than sleep
Or Travel than eat
Totally fun
Our family loves 
And cares for her

and:

Moving:
Our
Motto

LOL...
Now that I think of it, Moving is our Family's Motto....I love that he thinks of it that way.

On a sad note, I distinctly remember a time when I was so heavy, and so miserable, in physical and emotional pain, that  I would have preferred sleeping and eating over anything else..

And that truly is no longer the case.
Thanks to my amazing son Thomas for opening my eyes

And Happy Mother's Day!

Well, between Thanksgiving and New Years I managed to put on 10 pounds!!!
ARGH!!! Pre-WLS this was normal, but I really expect better of myself now. So I have been working really hard on losing those extra 10 pounds. This is especially hard when those crazy food cravings hit!
What is a formerly Morbidly Obese Neo-Warrior Princess to do?
Well, I am, as we speak, stuffing my face with celery. Yup, you heard me right, CELERY!
I have so far crunched down on 4 stalks of stringy, crispy, yummy celery.
If this doesn't kill my food cravings I will most likely move on to having a full-blown nervous brekdown!!!
On a serious note, I have managed to lose 7 of those pounds in the last week.
Wanna know how much celerey chomping that took? (trust me, you don't really wanna know...sigh)
So, protein first, celery forever after is the new motto.
(burp....)

I am no longer a blonde...felt like I needed a change...I think I like it, but it is taking me a while to get used to it.....It's like I have this need to rediscover myself, my physical self, after so many years of not wanting to see.....

9-15-06  Well, I have been stalling for about 3 months, playing around with the same 8 pounds....then , over the last two weeks, the stall is gone,,,so is my appetite, but I am still getting in enough protein and fluids...but, this morning, when i looked on the scale, I noticed that I am only 1/2 of a pound overweight.....great news,,,,at first I was a little disappointed about that last 1/2 pound.....until I realized I have lost exactly 150 pounds....un-freaken-believable...

For all I know, this could be a one day thing, and I may never lose that last 1/2 pound....but hey, bmi of 25.1 is not too shabby....and I am just one big sneeze away from being "normal" (or as normal as this crazy chick can be)........

HA........I AM GIDDY.........
at 174.5 pounds (5'10")
Love,
Dorota

9-20-06
I am NORMAL!!!!!
BMI of 24.9
Never believed I would actually get here.....
Hey, I just checked my profile and in rounded up my just over 24.9 BMI to 25.0....I think I am offended...LOL
No worries...I still know.......
To be honest, I never actually believed I would get here......
9-22-06

still losing...now weigh 172.5
Funny, my 5-28-06 post, when I posted my weight of 177.5, was the start of a very long stall....after that day I never weighed 177.5 again...scale got to as high as 187 to as low as 179. back and forth, back and forth.....I was sure I was done....Then, this month, whoosh.....I actually started september at 182...now i am 172.5...SO, how do i calculate my september loss?....9.5 pounds I guess...At 5'10", that is a very good weight for me...normal BMI of 24.8.......Doctor Aranow said I would go down to 170....

8-19-06
 I remember being morbidly obese and looking through the fashion magazines and ""wish-shopping"", knowing that I could never wear those fashions, no matter how much I liked them.....It was sort of a sorry little past-time of mine....wishful thinking, ...like window shopping...but a little sad and wistful....well, last month I was doing it again, looking through magazines, picking out the "perfect " outfits, just for the fun of it....There was this one wrap dress that I really loved.....and guess what????I bought it today, at Kohl's . on sale....Size L, not even the largest size they had...It is Sexy, and it means something very special to me....It is like walking through the looking glass, from the land of "wishful thinking", to the land of "make it happen"...It is actually the very same dress from the magazine, the very same dress I admired last month....Now, I certainly know that the best things about WLS are those other changes, ,,,like how much I am able to do with the kids, and how I have no more sleep apnea, or how my blood pressure has gone down....But I will honestly say that being able to buy a ""wishful thinking" dress I first admired in a magazine is pretty cool ....I am looking forward to wearing it.....I have just the right heels to go with it...lol

 

5-28-06
I walked in the same parade with my son that I walked one year ago...what a difference...no more pain!!!my feet are fine, my back doesn't hurt my hips don't ache...I have so much more energy and am able to do so much more ...WOW...
Over the last month, I have been having some problems with hunger...I have been sooo hungry for weeks, and have been eating way too many carbs, snacking in the afternoons and evenings on crackers and pretzels....not good...made me feel like my eating was out of control again....but guess what....the uncontrollable eating passed, and when all was set and done, I lost 5 or 7lbs this month..(not too sure exactly where I started May)...
I am now 177.5 lbs......only 3.5 lbs away from being """normal""" .
I am of course happy with the weightloss, but I am starting to worry about losing too much weight...Doctor Aranow said he thought I would get down to 170 lbs,,so I guess that is the number I will give myself before I start seriously worrying....It's all so confusing...I am exersizing a lot more , since Doctor A stressed the importance of cardiovascular exersize...I have gone rollerbladding, I have gone swimming, have been going to the gym more, and have joined the "powerwalking" group during my lunch time...I enjoy the eliptical machine at the gym ...I have also been much more active with my kids, doing a lot of walking and hiking...It is so much fun...signing off for now,
Love,
Dorota

 

4-1-06 187 lbs.....
So I have been thinking and decided that I do have a new goal weight..It is actually an old goal I had in the back of my mind but was too afraid to actually make my official goal...Because I was afraid to "fail"...So now, officially, I want to be a normal weight for my height...24.9 bmi...which is 174 pounds......So i am 13 pounds away from being a "normal weight"....and in one week I will be 10 months out from my surgery, so I think it is doable....I am happy at my weight now, and I feel great...I am a size 10 or 12 in most clothes.....it feels good...but I think that being a "normal weight" is a good goal......
Bye for now,
Love, Dorota

4-8-06 I decided to copy this from a post I wrote today...It made me smile...

 Well, how about that. I had gone to a superbowl party with my husband in February. It was a his co-worker's house...I had met a few of the people in the past, but didn't know most of them...And guess what? Yesterday my husband found out that they all thought I was his girlfriend! They had either originally met me when I was heavy, or seen my pictures at his locker (heavy pictures)...So for the last 2 months, rumors at his job have been spreading about his new "arm-candy"......It seems they were thinking that he is cheating on his wife with the new "hottie" (hahahaha)...Pretty cool that I am the "hottie"

Love,
Dorota

4-14-06
 This morning I jumped on the big trampoline with my kids ...I felt like a big kid myself. All giddy and hyper.....I remember, this time last year, just my standing in the middle of the trampoline made it stretch all the way down, almost touching the ground...that was at 325 lbs...Forget about even trying to jump....
Today I jumped, I jumped high, and then i laid down on the trampoline and looked up at the sky..The tips of the pine trees formed a circle high above me, and the sky was blue, just starting to fill with wispy clouds. and I was sooooo happy..It was one of those perfect moments that I wish I could somehow feeze and capture in time...And all around me was the sound of happy laughter...the children's and MINE!!!
I love my life, I love the person I am able to be because of my surgery... I am no longer trapped inside my body, no longer the one stuck inside, looking out and wishing I could do things, wishing I could have an active role....
I am WOMAN , HEAR ME ROAR!!!!
I am Woman, See me SOAR!!!

2-5-06
Well, the weightloss is moving along nicely...It slowed down which is good...February first I was 197.5,  I now weigh 194......all is good. I have been having some problems with my sciatic nerve, but it seems to be getting better.
Gotta go get ready for church,
Love,
Dorota

3-26-06 hello there,
Things are well. I am having some issues with hypoglycemia, low blood sugar, let me tell you, it is a slippery slope making sure I eat often enough to keep my blood sugar up,, without it turning into all-day grazing....I have been struggling with hypoglycemia for a few years now, so it is not brought on by the surgery....
I am really happy with my weight. It's still going down slowly, which is great...March first I was 193, I now weigh 189.5...I have lost 135 lbs !!!!I have reached my goal...although my doctor thinks I will lose another 20 lbs....I started going to the gym again, as I have been basically only walking for my exercise since X-mas, and Doctor A. wants me to do more cardio...Also, I need to build some muscles, as things are sagging...lol...Let me tell you, as difficult as it has been to drag my butt to the gym, once I was there, it was so much fun and so great, I forget why I stopped going....
I have been going to more support groups, and I am really glad. There are some fantastic people who go, and I really hope to build some long-lasting friendships....
All for now,
Love,
Dorota

1-2-06

 Ok..I did not reach onederland by 1-1-06 like I had hoped...It took an extra day!
But today, I am 199.5 pounds..Seeing that number on the scale this morning literally brought tears to my eyes...
I started this Journey at 324.5 pounds at my consult with Dr. Aranow. Day of Surgery I was 310 pounds...Now I am under 200 pounds.
This is soooooo unbelivable to me. Dr. A said last month that based on how I am losing , he expects me to get to as low as 170 pounds, but I really don't think I want to get that low,,,
I am 5'10", and I think this is a pretty good weight for me. I would like to lose 10 more pounds to make a "buffer zone"...
Now my body just needs to catch up to my weightloss...
Of to the gym...gotta build up those muscles....

ONEDERLAND!
Can you believe it?

Love, Dorota

 

12-4-05 Well, Thanksgiving is past..It was great..It feels so good to enjoy all the cooking and all the company and not eat so much that I just want to die afterwards...I did overindulge on the pies a bit, had about 1/3 slice of sweet potato and 1/3 slice of apple pie...and the sugar made me real sleepy...oh well...other that that I felt great...I also had my appointment with Dr. A last week and he is very pleased with my progress...According to his scale I have lost 110 pounds, 95 since the surgery...of course, in the morning, at home, with no clothes on my body , no shoes on my feet, and no food in my belly, I had lost 115 (100 since surgery)by the day I saw him....oh well, The scale has been moving like crazy this week...I have now reached 207 (actually 206.5)...and I am overweight...209 was Dr. A.'s initial goal for me...seeing how I have already reached that, he now thinks I can expect to lse about 40 more pounds...That's just crazy....I myself was hoping for about 18 more........this whole journey is so unbelivable...Oh yes, my bloodwork was pretty good..the only thing is that my iron count is low and I have to start taking iron supplements..considering that I have been borderline anemic all my life, I am not surprised....
So for another countdown..in November I again lost a total of 10 pounds..started at 219, ended at 209....So let's see how kind december is to me...I am already at 206.5, so my goal to be in onderland by New Years seems reachable...Onward with the weightloss......
Love,
Dorota

12-18-05
I am obsessing a bit too much about the numbers....scale shows 203...6 pounds down so far in December...I know it's silly, but I really want to be in Onederland....I have pretty much given up trying to settle on a goal weight....I just am letting my body do what it's doing....I feel really healthy...Although, on a dissapointing note, my doctor did put me back on one blood pressure med...My pressure was just not as low as it should be...Oh well, that's still way better than the four I was on before surgery....
Love,
Dorota

12-25-05
Merry Christmas....
This is the day our Lord was Born......
Celebrate Him

I am happy to say that I did not overindulge...THis Christmas was so great, my family and Friends are so important to me. I am so happy with my health...It is so much better that n this time last year.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year,
Love,
Dorota