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 I swore to myself that I wouldn't be one of those people who start losing weight and then abandon my blog but of course I have become that person.  I see what happens!  We get healthier and feeling better, more confiden and suddenly blogging about my weight isn't at the top of my fun activities list!  However, I really do want to document my journey so I'm back to update this thing.

My surgery was 8 months ago and I've lost 85 lbs.  I hate to say that I've lost it because I don't hope to find it!  It's been shed and it's gone for good.  My number would be bigger if I was more dedicated to exercising; I know that and even with all my extra energy it's still a challenge to discipline myself into working out.  I do walk (just not often enough), do some light weights and even play with a hula hoop.  It's nice to just be moving around and doing the simplest things like showering without getting tired.

I've reconnected with an old friend that I was terrified to see in person since he hadn't seen me since I gained so much weight.  Now that I'm more confident and comfortable as I'm shrinking I see him often and I told him all about my surgery and now he's with me on my journey.  

On the other hand, I've taken an online friendship to a new level and now have an actual relationship.  We are separarted by distance for the moment but I also was honest with him about my surgery and he's been a wonderful support and boost to my confidence.  Also, not bad motivation to work out more.  

Life is good. This surgery and Dr. Alvarez changed my life for the better, forever.  

 

 Three people asked me for a rundown of my experience and I sent it out but I thought I should post it here too just for my own memory.  Forgive the messy writing style- I was still in the hospital.  


  I was so calm and excited leading up to my surgery.  The hardest part was the liquid diet but I really did it because I was committed to this new life.
The trip to the hospital is only 2 miles and we had no trouble crossing the boarder.  You only have to show your passport on the way back into the US.  As soon as we got here Dr. Alvarez was ready to meet us in his office.  We talked for a bit and met Jessica our nurse who was with us the whole time pretty much.  She speaks perfect English.  She translates for the other nurses.  We did a weigh-in with her then she took us to x-ray.   Then she took us to the hospital room where we changed into the gown to wear in surgery.  No undies or anything and it fastened back ward.  Then someone took our blood, didn't hurt at all.  The IV was put in and that was kind of the most painful part of the whole thing.  Then the anesthesiologist comes in to say hi and he checked our neck and throat.  Then I was moved to a gurney and that's honestly the last thing I remember before waking up.  The hospital itself is older and all in Spanish.  The rooms for Dr. A are pretty nice though and have upgraded bathrooms.  His office is very nice.  

When I woke up I was a little loopy and hardly remember what happened but for some reason I really wanted to pee so they brought me the little porta potty and let me sit on it but I never peed.  My parents were cracking up because I kept insisting I had to go but then I'd just fall asleep sitting there.  Embarrassing.  Once I was more awake I went into the real bathroom.  I changed into a comfy fitting dress so I could wear that instead of the gown.  I slept until 6pm and the doctors came in to check on us at about 6:30.  Dr. Gabe was the other doctor and he's also very cute, they both are!  The nurses who do not speak english will checked on us throughout the night and there is a night English speaking nurse named Christina who was with us  We saw them about every 2 hours.  I was up to pee just about that often.  The next day is we had to start walking every half hour.  The only pain that I had at all was a bit of soreness at one of the incision sites and then some gas build up (they pumped our stomachs full of gas during the surgery and it's still escaping) the second day.  But none of it was unmanageable or too uncomfortable.  I was able to drink and have ice chips easily.  
Today with 8 hrs of driving, my tummy is sore.  It's very tender and easily jostled so it was an interesting ride.  We're still on all liquids for three more weeks and then we get to start soft foods, I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to an egg :)  Lost 30lbs at least so far though.

 I broke 300!   Weighed in at 299 today!   
That means 26lbs total lost and 17 since I started the diet.  

I met my first goal which was to get my BMI under 50 before my surgery date!   Time to set new goals. 

The liquid diet has been really hard but mostly it's been a matter of dealing with my brain.  I still crave food and WANT to eat.  It's not so much that I'm starving or feel hungry all the time, I just want to eat.  I've made it 16 of my 21 days already though so there is no turning back.

We leave for Mexico in just a few days and it can't get here fast enough for me.  Tomorrow is my last day of work for 2 weeks and I'm really looking forward to that! 

Also, my before pics are posted now.  It's scary to see myself from the back or even the side, oh hell, even the front! 

 I wanna say a great big thank you to everyone who has written to me or answered my endless questions.  I'm so close now! 
My surgery date is now officially:

9/16/10!

WOO HOO! 

The money got worked out and the deposit is made.  My passport is in my purse already!  We found someone to keep our dogs so we don't have to board them and my grandparents are letting us borrow their luxury SUV so that my sister and I each have a backseat to lounge in on our way home.  The only puzzle piece we're waiting on now is my mom's passport to come from Canada and they've told us it'll be less than 2 weeks so that's perfect.  I am beyond excited! 


Next comes the liquid diet.  I've lost 9 lbs already in preparation - weening off food to about one meal a day.  I'm scared about how hard it's going to be but I know I won't fail because this means far too much to me.  The next time I write I'm sure it'll be during that time and I'll probably be complaining but even I have to forgive myself for that, it's gonna be hard!  

If not eating was easy, none of us would be overweight!   

July 24th, 2010 weight - 321 lbs (lost 4 lbs from highest)

Got the news today that my sister and I are both approved for our loans!   This is HUGE exciting news.  For the past couple of weeks I have been researching how in the world we were going to pay for this.  With the help of my super supportive parents and a surprisingly generous aunt we borrowed against a CD.   We go on Monday to get our $$$.  I am so relieved to have that step taken care of.  

Next to handle is our passports.  Dad's is current but the rest of us were way expired.  Mom did her research on getting her Canadian passport and that's in the works.  Michelle and I went and got the pictures taken and Monday we're going to our local court clerk where they handle passports.  In looking into it I found that it would be cheaper to get a passport card which is used for bordering countries like Mexico and Canada.  Even if we pay to expedite them it's cheaper than if we got the passport book which is needed for overseas travel.  My next entry will be about making the appointment and starting the liquid diet! 

This morning brought great news for me and my sister.  We were both cleared by Dr. A. and so now we're planning our next steps.  Some wonderful people replied to my post about questions and gave us great advice for getting my mom's passport in order.  Thank you all!  That was super helpful.  Tomorrow we should get info on the loan process.  I can't believe I'm actually excited to start my liquid diet!  Here's hoping the loan process is a breeze!  

July 8th, 2010 - weight 325lbs
It is hard for me to believe that I'm writing this.  I am never, ever honest and open about weight issues with anyone- including and maybe especially with myself.  Yet here I am, picture and real name exposed right next to that glaring over 50 BMI.  What am I thinking?  

I guess I'm thinking that it's time to stop lying and hiding and pretending.  I'm ready to be me.  I'm ready to shed this shell of a person that I created to mask the real me.  I'm not in therapy and I'm surely no psychiatrist but I know there are deeper issues involved with my weight but I don't know what they are entirely.  I guess I've hidden from them just the way I've hidden myself from the world.  I hope, pray and believe that this is the day that I put a stop to it.  

My ultimate plan at the moment is to head down to see Dr. Alvarez and get this nipped in the bud (VSG) .  Any opinions or information on him and his practice would be very welcomed.