P-Plan meals, snacks, water and exercise. 

L-Learn from mistakes
because new behaviors take many repetitions to become habits.
A-Ask for support
.  Ask family and friends to keep their treats at work and school so that your home can be a safe place to live without temptation. Recognise that not everyone will help but you can try to negotiate.

N-Nutritious food
and well balanced meals and snacks will make you feel wonderful and give you energy to keep going

B-Believe in yourself...you really can do it.

CathyHproudOHbyLizzyL.gif image by epworthgirl    1086.jpg picture by epworthgirlDecember 2005

vbg_1.jpg image by epworthgirl

I made my trip to Doctor for yearly physical  in December 2004 only to be told my liver enzymes are

up and I am type II Diabetic. I have been treated for chronic

depression for the last 15 years or longer. And the final clencher I

have ballooned myself up to my all time high weight. No wonder I have

diabetes, Im trying to kill myself with food.This all hit me like a

mountain had just caved in on me. I dont want to die. I have to guide

my grown children and enjoy my grandchildren for many more years. I

cant do this an lug all this extra eight around! My PCP then  told me

that he was reccomending that I get WLS, and he never usually does that

to any of his patient.Then a flicker of light in me went on, could this

mountain of a problem be overcome? I think with a competent surgeon, my

faith in my God and plenty of support from my friends and family. My

heavenly Father its all in your hands.

3-1-2005 I just got on the scales this morning and they were not kind

to me, I am making myself nuts watching the stuipid scales. They are

definitely off limits and I will only get weighed at the doctors office

from now on. Last week at the doctors office I am down 12 pounds from

my all time stinking high weight in December due to better eating

habits and a little exercise. This weight loss thing is so hard! I have

my first consult with the surgeon on March 8. I am trying to come up

with all the right questions to ask him. Thanks in part to you great

folks at AMOS.A lot of you guys have been there and done it, so I am

relying on your experiences which is so valuable to me at this time.

And will continue to be throughout this weightloss journey. (AND BY THE


with this one, noone in my family is overweight and noone can possibly

relate to this issue of morbid obesity that hasnt walked in our shoes.

I use to be the biggest Coka Cola addict in the world. As soon as I

heard that I have Diabetes II that cured that problem instantly. I am

sure the coke alone didnt do this, but it sure contributed. My sugar

intake on that alone was huge, so I cant figure out the 12 pound only

loss in over 2 months. I guess it took years to get this way and will

take that long to get it off. I need this weight loss surgery! I need

the help that it will provide me. I cant lose weight on my own. I have

never been addicted to anything in my life besides food, I am convinced

that food can be as addicting as any drug.

I found this on the site and thought it so in tune with my feelings:

Dear God, I admit that I have come to both love and hate the word

"diet." On the one hand, it represents hope for change. On the other,

it's like a sign flashing "Failure ahead!" I don't want to embark on

another faulty plan, Lord. I want to embark on a journey with You that

is led by You and depends on Your power. I can do nothing on my own!

Show me the path that will enable me to change. Show me, as only You

can, what works for me, what is healthy for me. I want to think of this

venture in positive terms, Lord -- not that I am signing up to be

miserable or in want. I want to learn to feed my body what it truly

needs when it truly needs it. And to feed my soul with the Bread of

Life -- You! Today I place my future, my failures, my setbacks, all of

my hopes and plans into Your hands. There alone will I find meaning and

true success in my life. Amen. - Heather Kopp

3-4-2005 Boya oh Boya! I am having one heck of a food fight with myself

right now. I have an appointment with WL Surgeon for the first time on

Tuesday. I am trying my darndest to loose weight before the WLS and its

a BATTLE!!! I am eating everything that comes in my path. I had arbys

roast beef sandwich (minus the bread), 4 mozarella stix and onion

petals from Arby's last night with my boys. How stupid is that? I dont

know if its nerves or what? I just want to eat everything!~ I bet the

insurance will require some type of structured weight loss history

before they approve. Never mind that I was on PFEN_FEN and pondimen for

several months and yo yo dieted all my life.I have now the added bonus

of now being diabetic and that has definitely thrown me for a loop. I

know exactly what I should be doing and eating, but just cant follow

through. I am furious with myself again!! Thank God every day is a new

start so I am trying to remain optimistic. HELP! Self control where are


"A Second Chance" When you are troubled, I wish you peace. When your

spirit has reached the bottom, I lifted you up upon eagles wings. When

you are discouraged, I wish you hope. When you are lonely, Know that I

am there. When you are sad, I give you joy. When you feel unloved, I

give you love. When you feel empty, I wish you beauty. When darkness

falls, I wish you sunshine. When you want to cry, I give you my smile.

I may be darker than you, I could be lighter too, But that shouldn't

matter too you. We can't blame life for the mistakes we make. We can't

blame others for the chances we didn't take. For we all are given a

second chance everyday. So if you are given a second chance, use it,

cherish it, learn from it, share it with another. But don't ever forget

where you came from nor abuse it. For my second chance gave me life,

taught me to


my second chance is the foundation of my happiness a perfect gift. A

Second Chance. Written By: Tina Carter South Carolina

3-06-2005 The scales were kind to me yesterday morning, my weight was

down 21 pounds mid December. That is a major accomplishment, I have

never managed any type of intentional weight loss on my own. Only two

more days until I see the weight loss surgeon. Can you say NERVOUS? I

never gave this profile any info on who I am: So I am an almos 50 in

December divorced single woman. I was married for 25 years and been

divorced for 7 years. I have four sons oldest being 30, identical twins

that are 28 and the baby Adam is 17. I have five grandchildren. The

absolute sweetest kids around. My famly is it for me. My ex moved off

to Illinois to find himself. We have no extended family here. My ex is

Air Force retired and we moved approximately 26 times. I took root here

in Oklahoma and I have not left in 20 years this year. I have a sister

I am very close to in Alabama. Both my parents are deceased. I make my

own living and work hard for everything that I am and have. This weight

thing is a monkey on my back and one of the things I have ZERO control

over. I cant see myself having a real positive future unless I get this

weight under control. I have high blood pressure, diabetesII, herniated

disk in my neck, carpal tunnel in both hands, tennis elbow and horrible

knees. I already had surgery on one knee and wrist and probably could

get a few more. I dont go under the knife easy. But, I am ready to take

this chance on weight loss surgery. I am tired of being fat. As I get

older it gets harder and harder to carry this extra weight around. I

have to be able work for a lot more years. God give me strength and to

him I put ALL my faith in positive outcomes.

Why live if you can't live life? when all you do is sit on the

sidelines. When your mind sores with things to do, but your body

reminds you, No can do. When you think of all the things you have

missed, you just sit down and cry and very depressed. But there is hope

in a drastic way, are you willing to die to live another day? After all

that said and done, your mind and body will become one. So if you think

this surgery is right, then by all means have your flight. Life is to

short to live on the sidelines, so break free of those chains, and live

for another day. Written By: Angela Fox

3-07-2005 Well tomorrow I go for my first consult with the surgeon. I

guess i am in denial today thinking I can just loose this weight on my

own. Thats a joke, because each ounce I loose is a struggle, and always

knowing in the back of my head I will gain it back. I am getting to the

stage in life now where it has to work! I cant keep doing this yo-yo

dieting and just to see it all come back and then some.

3-08-2005 I vistited Dr. Hanan the WLS surgeon today. This guy is

pretty awesome in my eyes. If he can get this surgery approved and get

me through the surgery, I will love him forever. He is very calm and

self assured and made me feel very comfortable in his presence. I was

shown a video and then went to his office to ask all the questions I

could possibly think of, he showed me pictures of patients about my age

the before and after pics. He just lingering and kept talking to me and

acted like he had all the time in the world for me. He did a physical

and told me I looked like a good candidate for the surgery and

continued talking about the surgery. I asked him about some type of

time frame fo all the madness, and he said dealing with insurance and

getting the approval might be from 2 weeks right on up to 6 months. It

just depends on THEM! He also told me after the surgery I could drink

liquids right up to the time I took a bite of food. Also he confirmed I

would have that sickening little tube in my nose for approximately 30

hours post op. Funny thing, my concern is not making it through the

surgery but about that stupid tube in my nose. I think that will drive

me nuts. But, that too shall pass. I am leaving all this in the Lord's

hand and all things in his perfect timing. P.S. Lord, please throw a

little extra patience at me during this time.

HOW TO STAY YOUNG Remember, there is no way you can look as bad as that

person on your drivers license. Throw out nonessential numbers. This

includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That

is why you pay them. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you

down. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening,

whatever. Never let the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's

workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's. Enjoy the simple

things. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is

with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets,

keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable,

improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help. Don't take

guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign

country, but NOT to where the guilt is. Tell the people you love that

you love them, at every opportunity. Don't sweat the petty things and

don't pet the sweaty things. AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Humpty Dumpty was


3-14-05 I am furious with Aetna insurance. I took it upon myself to

call Aetna and talk to them. Because I kept getting this nagging

feeling they werent going to pay. Sure enough when I questioned them

about our companies individual coverage, there is no rider in my policy

that covers this surgery. To put it mildly I am devestated. I dont

understand why the insurance company approved the weight loss surgery

consult with the surgeon. This managed to get my hopes up and then have

them dashed by this latest information. I dont quit easy though, this

fight is just beginning to get this surgery and looks like it might be

a long one. Pray for me please---this is making me nuts!!!!

3-17-03 Ok Ok Cathy calm back down . I had my company's HR director

call Aetna and ask them about the coverage and praise be to the Lord.

They will cover it! The person I spoke to yesterday at Aetna didnt know

what she was talking about. Since my company renewed their policy in

December 2004. Our policy wasnt affected by Aetna's new rules making

WLS surgery an optional benefit. Our coverage is still on.My poor heart

cant take too much more of this. Please approve me SOON Aetna.I have to

get the surgery done in 2005.

3-26-2005 I had way to much fun with Grandbaby Bri today. Tomorrow is

Easter so I picked her up and us girls went shopping. I bought her an

Easter basket at Walmart and a Happy meal at Mc Donalds. What more can

a 2 year old ask for? She is so much fun to be with I have four grown

sons, so you can imagine the fun time I have with my Granddaughter. She

loved riding high up in my truck. She says she can "see" a whole lot

better. And by the way I am down to 238

3-28-05 Well I survived Easter candy temptations up until today of

course, the day after Easter stores are practically giving the stuff

away. So I gave in to temptation and bought a pack of the peanut butter

chocolate eggs. For lunch my total calorie intake including that was

about 800 calories. So just to kinda break even, I need to starve the

rest of the day. I am very upset with myself. I just need to quit

buying the junk, I cant eat it if I dont have it around. Junk food is

my issue, I am not that crazy about regular food. I have always been a

grab something quick to kill the hunger person. THIS IS SO HARD!!!!! I

havent even had the surgery yet, I have to do better than this.

3-04-05 I heard from surgeons office finally today and they had

contacted the insurance company. Of course Aetna is requiring the 6

months supervised diet program with doctor. I tried to start this

awhile back, and the response from PCP was to wait to hear from the

surgeons office. WELL I HEARD!!! So now the first visit will be on

Wednesday at 10:00 to start step one and insurance is also requiring a

visit to the good old shrink. I knew this was coming down just didnt

get the help from PCP I was hoping for. So it will be at least six

months from this Wednesday. I guess I am looking at a somewhere in

September date for surgery if I am lucky. My insurance gets renewed in

December and at that point am not sure Aetna will even cover the

surgery. S will have to push this thing hard to see it through. Seems

like this will be forever!!I know I wasnt going to be any exception for

Aetna rules. Just more obstacles.

3-06-05 I was reading a post here on OH tody and it just finally made

so much sense to me. I just have to give up "ALL" sugar I am one of the

lucky ones who cant just have a little bit and stop. It just keeps

going and going. That is what got me to this point. "SUGAR" That is my

drug of choice and has kept me in its control way to long. Farewell my

friend sugar. I dont need you around anymore you are killing me. My

life is worth so much more than you.I will fight the battle to resist

you at the grocery store. You are no longer welcome in my home. I will

trade you for foods that will nourish my body like protein. Even though

I weigh close to XXX pounds I am quite sure I am malnourished from

never learning how to eat properly in my life. Better to learn these

lessons late in life than to never have learned them at all. Thank God

for OH. Obesity stole my brothers life at the age of 59 years old. My

wonderful compassionate, kind, caring protector of his baby sister (me)

and I am sure sugar played a part in ripping him away from me way to

soon. Terry if you are looking down from heaven at me know that I love

you. Give Momma and Daddy a hug for me, I will never get over missing

you guys. Hope you are taking care of each other till I join you.

4-06-05 Well finally I think I am getting all my ducks in a row so that

Aetna insurance will approve this surgery. I went to my PCP today and

started the good ol six months supervised weight program. Only 5 more

visits. I have approval for up to 6 visits with the nutritionist. PCp

scheduled a sleep apnea test for me on the 9th of June. he thinks I

have sleep apnea. So I guess that will bump my comorbidities up a

notch. Like I dont have enough already!!!!! The only thing still not

scheduled is the psychiactric release from the shrink. Does anyone know

a WLS friendly psychologist in the Oklahoma Area, that works cheap? If

you do, please contact me. I am sort of glad now that the surgery wont

be until Fall, it allows me to do all my yardwork this summer(mowing 2

acres). I hate to depend on anyone to help me out on that--So its a

good thing I guess. Word to the wise for people with Aetna

insurance--find out exactly what they require for this surgery--there

is no way around this 6 month supervised diet thing, so just bite the

bullet and get it over with.Good luck on all you guys with upcoming


3-11-05 If I was a cry baby, I would be sqawlin right now. I woke up

with the WORST sore throat, It has to be strep. Because I cant swallow

and when I do, it feels like I am ripping my eardrums out. My weight is

231! Yea for that one anyway.Not the reccomenned way to lose weight---I

have been sick as a dog!


4-23-05 The quickest way to confuse the heck out of someone is to send

them to a  nutritionist. I went on Tuesday April 19, 2004 She has now

decided that I need to get in 150 grams of carbs a day. Due to

diabetes, I need to keep my blood sugar leveled out throughout the day.

I think I will just stick to my high protein diet and call it good.

Nutritionist told me not to focus on calories, just look at carbs. This

is just way to confusing for me. Depends on who you talk to about

losing weight. Watch the carbs, protein or calories. Bottom line to all

this is just quit eating junk food with their empty calories. Cut out

the flour, sugar, rice and pasta.I wish I had my metabolism back. I am

at 231. I must have done something right since Decemer down 31 pounds.

I ride my bike and walk more during the day too. Easiest way to think

about is calories in-calories out! I am drinking at least 64 ounces of

sugar free liquids daily! Yea me!!! DRINK ,DRINK AND THEN DRINK SOME


5-16-2005  Great now I have to make another appointment for this month

with my dietician.  I am seeing doctor for supervised diet.  But, just

dont want Aetna to deny on a loophole.  I will see this damn dietrician

monthly to cover everything in Aetna's guidline.  I guess I can listen

to her  for 45 minutes.  All I can think of when I see her is that she

doesnt look like she has a fat cell anywhere in her body, and probably

never had.  Here she is telling me what to eat.She is really a nice

lady, just cant stand for anyone to tell me what to do, especially when

it comes to eating.

 High note: I went to my PCP on my monthly weigh in ritual and had lost

seven pounds this month.

5-18-05 I saw my nutritionist this week and down 4 more pounds.  At

lease the scale is heading in the other direction.  She gave me some

pretty good advice for my 6 months diet.  More fruits and veggies.  She

says more of those in the frontdoor to push the junk I eat out the back

door.  I am really trying to keep the junk food out the house.  I think

surgery will be around the end of September.  I wish the city offered a

VGB support group.  I went to one group, but those were all RNY and I

have already decided to go the VGB.  Its the right choice for me at

this time in my life. So will keep going to the main message board and

hope I want get up beat up for my choice.  Those are great folks


6-19-2005 Went last night for the sleep study to see if I have sleep

apnea.  I like to have never went to sleep with all those sensors glued

to my head.  They didnt come in and put the mask on, so maybe thats a

good sign that I dont have sleep apnea.  I shall wait to hear from PCP

on results of the sleep study.

6-24-05  Today Psychiatrist office called to say they are now accepting

my Aetna insurance.  The psychiatrist will be calling later today to

set up appointment for the dreaded physicatric clearance test. I can

hardly wait.

6-26-05Well its a done deal--My Psche appointment is set up with Dr.

Jim Keller on July 20 at 8:30 a.m.Can this possibly mean I am getting

closer to my surgery.  Pray for me that is does!!!

6-30-2005  This time is going pretty fast on this 6 months supervised

diet.I had the sleep study and dont have Aetna.  They discovered I have

another problem with is called restless leg syndrom It effects your

limbs at night and creates a problem where you constantly are needing

to move your limbs.(Sometimes during the day)  This leads to you

constantly being awakened during the night although subconsiously. 

This leads to sleep deprivation and exaustion during the day, inability

to concentrate, memory loss and iritability.  They subscribed a

medication usually prescribed for Parkinsons disease.(REQUIP)  After

one pill I feel like a new person this morning.  I woke up this morning

and realized how clear my head was and actually feltt like I had rested

during the night.  I guess the sleep study folks realized the problem

when I woke up in the morning and all the wires were twisted and

wrapped around my body several timed from the tossing and turning. 

Thank GOD for finding this out.  I didnt even know I had a problem, had

it so long just though I was suppose to feel that exausted for the rest

of my life. If nothing else comes from this journey, but finding out

this--It will all be worth it.  Pay attention folks, if you wake up

tired and feeling like someone beat you up every morning.  Ask your

doctor questions and get help.  There is no known cure for this nerve

disorder, but there is help and relief.

7-16-2005 iI am feeling especially humbled today so I need to mention

my absolute faith in my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  I dont usually

ever preach my faith, I choose to live it.  i am just absolutely amazed

how the Lord continues to work in my life and to him I continue to give

all my faith--I am abslutely nothing with him.I refuse to be

frightenend of this surgery.  The absolute outcome is in his hands. I

read all the time about how frightened folks are before their surgery. 

This is how i deal with it.  I turn my fears all over to the one in

control, and then I let them go.
I have my psyche evaluation coming up this week along with 4th month of

PCP weigh in and nutrition appointments.  i feel the surgery getting a

little closer.
I have decided that i love the GNC banana protein drink and also the

low carb slim fast.  I am doing a little experimenting with the

flavors, although taste buds may change completely after surgery.
I am probably going to have one of the longest profiles on here when

all is said and done.  i really find writing my thoughts down very


7-19-20 Wow!!! Getting this weight loss surgery approved is not for

sissies.  I have three different appointment this week, its breaking

the bank on co-pays.  I have the one tomorrow with the psyche.  I just

want to finally get through all this and have the surgery behind me.  I

had a very frustrating day with the nutritionist.  She told me to lay

off the slim fast and eat real food.  Its near to impossible for me to

have veggies and fruits in my diet.  I need to try though.  I think it

would be so much easier just to not eat than to go through all the darn

hassles. I am hoping i am on the right track for approval.  havent been

given any guidance from the doctors, just sent me out to get this

surgery approved myself.  OK pity party is over for today.  i have

other things to do.  Good luck wherever you are on your journey in


7-21-2005  Well I had the famous psychological evaluation yesterday. 

He stated that he would be recommending me to the surgeon for surgery. 

Cross your fingers that surgery happens soon.  This ,  wasnt bad as

everyone thinks, its just one more thing to get through.  I dont know

why some people are intimidated by the mental health folks.  They put

on their pants the same way we do, and just human beings like we are. 

Who cares what they think anyway.  I told him that I am at peace with

myself at almost 50 years old, fat or thin.  He was more concerned as

to why I left my husband after 25 years, he wants to keep the same

thing from happening to him with his wife. LOL

8-14-2005  Well let me see.  This month I have managed to gain 8

pounds.  I have the haircut from he!!, and I have a cyst on the tendon

on the bottom of my foot.  So that might explain some of the

depression.  I have completed month 5 of the supervised diet.  Next

month will be the magical number 6 and then i will submit to Aetna. 

Pray for me folks, i dont think i can do the diet thing again.  It is

way to frustrating. I will be on vacation all this coming week.  So

hopefully I can relax a little and maybe i can get back on track with

the diet.  Of course there are no promises when it comes to dieting for

me.  I went back on the diet sodas knowing they cause water retention. 

Did i learn---NOPE!!!

8-16-2005  I had my beloved 5 year old Chihuahua put down today.  He

has been sick all of his life.  I have spent a fortune on vet bills, to

no avail. His immune system was basically shot and didnt respond to the

medication anymore. I finally got over being selfish and trying to keep

him with me as long as possible.  I looked at his sad eyes for the last

time today.  I was crying so hard when I left him there.  He was just

the biggest baby I have, and so very close to my heart.  Today I grieve

for you, my little man ALEX.
I must try to do some kind of healthy eating today, when I am depressed

like I am now, I just dont care one way or the other.

9-19-2005 I finally finished the six months supervised diet and

nutritionist appointments.  Lets just say I gained and last, and then I

gained and then lost and lately I just gained.  I am now at 249 and

rising.  I  hope Aetna sees fit to approve this surgeyr without any

further delays.  Just sit back wait and pray is all I know to do.

9-22, 2005  Wow things changed overnight.  The nurse at Dr.  Hanan's

office called and likeliehood Aetna will not pay for the VGB and thats

all Dr.  Hanan does.  I am now looking for a new surgeon to do the RNY

and that choice right now is Dr. Philip Floyd and I made an appointment

with him for October 5.  I hope that office works wonders, because my

insurance changes on i December and who knows if weightloss surgery

will be covered.  Thankfully most of my tests are completed and I am in

good shape with necessary paperwork.

9-29-2005  Well the new appointment has been made with Dr. Philip Floyd

in Edmond.  The consult will be on October 5 at 10:15.  I hope things

roll fast on this one.  I have all the paperwork required by Aetna and

requesting the RNY surgery that they approve of.

10-1-2005  I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo approved.  I got the

letter from Aetna saying they have approved on appeal my fight for VGB

surgery.  My surgeon had told me he has never known of Aetna approving

this,  My prayers must have been heard is all I can say.  I never once

called Aetna.  I just went to their website and found out what they

require and did it to the letter.  I am so incredibly blessed to be one

of the  people approved for this surgery.  Praise God!!!!

10-3-2005  I called my surgeon's office today and scheduled my VGB for

November 7 at 9:00 A.M.  I am so ready for this surgery.  I know there

are some people wondering why I chose VGB, for me at 50 years old its

the right surgery and I am comfortable with the decision and also my

doctor.  My PCP says this surgeon has less complications than anyone

else he knows that does the surgery.

October 10, 2005 - APPROVED!!! Lord, I still cant believe Aetna

approved me, one moment I am happy-the next terrified.I have these

thoughts racing through my head, that if anything happens, I just hope

my kids and grandkids remember how much I love them.  My
sister has scheduled a trip to Italy for November.  Thats the same

month I am having surgery.  I am having a real hard time deciding

whether I should tell her about the surgery and have her worry.  She is

against the surgery, so chances are I wont say a thing.!!


10-15-2005  Damn the timing of it all, I just talked to my sister and

she leaves for Italy two days before my surgery.  I havent told her I

am even having the surgery, and wont because it will just worry her,

and she might even cancel her trip.  She needs this vacation to relax. 

Lord, its  you and I on this one. I will  have to let my Mother and my

brother as my guardian angels in the operating room, what better ones

could I ask for?

10-31-2005  Wow only 6 days and a wake up till surgery.  I am having

some sleepless nights.  I get up at all hours to visit this site and

read all I can about the surgery.  I think I am totally obessed with

getting this surgery over with.  I am looking forward to my new life

and getting on with it.  I dont want my life centered around eating and

the lack of it, I hope to achieve a comfortable balance with food. It

seems like since a year ago I have been on a mission to achieve this,

and now I am so close to surgery!  I am looking forward to the time

away from work, just to clear my head from the stress there, I will

take days off anyway I can get them at this point. You know it doesnt

matter how hard I work to loose weight, I always manage to pack it back

on.  I am hoping this will be a permanent solution, I know it will mean

life long committment and work to make this surgery work for me.

surgerypic-1.jpg image by epworthgirl11-17-2005  Yea...Im 10 days out from surgery and feeling so much

better.  I am already off diabetes meds and high blood pressure meds. 

The surgery was a bit more than I anticipated.  I guess with my age, it

just a shock to the old system.  As of today I am down approximately 13

pounds.  This surgery probably saved my life.    I will always be

eternally grateful to my lord and saviour, aetna insurance and Dr.

Russell for the opportunity to have this life saving surgery.  All

things in God's perfect timing---PRAISE GOD!!!!

1071-1.jpg image by epworthgirl12-14-2005Hernia suck!.  I threw up so hard, that I managed to tear

loose some of the healing tissue and give myself a brand new incisional

hernia.  This monster hernia will need repair in around six months.The

pain I felt is so much worse than anything felt after WLS.  So here ya

go guys anyone who thinks this surgery is the easy way out, needs to

stop and think before they speak.<

12-23-2005 I am now down almost 30 pounds and thrilled.  Its so close to

the holidays that I have been exposed to all kind of food and sweets at

work.  Today I had several cookies, I just refuse to sweat about it. 

Its the holidays and being human, I caved in and enjoyed a few sweets. 

I will make up for it after the first of the year.

January 28,2006  I have fought like H--- to get down to 215.  The

battle continues  I am adjusting to this new tool of weightloss. I

still dont regret getting the VBG and losing slowly.  I honestly think

it is healthier for me in the long run.  God is good all the time.  My

best friend lost her husband last month, and I am trying to help her

along.  She has been diagnosed manic depression and already had two

strokes on top of that, within the last year.  I am incredibly busy and

exausted.  Her sister is coming into town February 8 to hopefully

lighten the burden of her care.

March 13, 2006 The journey continues.  I am a very slow looser and I

mean literallly.  I have been concentrating on drinking as much water

as possible (without floating away)  I think that alone is helping

things along.  I see onederland in the not so distant future.  I am

feeling pretty good, and dont miss the blood pressure and diabetic

medicine at all.  The surgeon want to schedule the hernia repair

surgery and I suggested the Fall, because I am not up to another

surgery.  He says that he will tuck some of my stomach in when he does

that procedure.  I still have to figure out how to get the pannilectomy

approved by insurance.  As that seems to be my biggest problem and

creating backpain from dragging all that around.  I knew going into

surgery that the "panni" surgery was not going to be an easy challenge

to get approved. I will manage some how.  Because I have come to far

now not to get that done.  The VBG surgery works, but you have to make

it work.  Because the surgery itself is only a tool.  I am so thankful

that I saw a nutritionist and know what I need to do nutritional to

help things along

3-17-2007 The long awaited incisional surgery day is finally here.  I got this hernia 5 weeks out from my original surgery in 2005.  Throwing up brocolli and baked fish saw hard that it ripped out stitches from new surgery.  The hernia has now grown to volleyball size and so huge it has taken on a life of its own.  So I went in for surgery this day to correct the problem, my honey from Texas came up to take care of me and stayed the whole time I was in hospital (slept on floor of hospital)  and took care of me for a week when I got home.  I am forever grateful to this man that I love. My angel baby!

The doctor did another liver biopsy and I still have unexplained mild liver damage brought on by ?????? Maybe diabetes and maybe from years of being fat or possibly environmental factors.  I can never take tylenol, ibuprofen etc.  I had the full line of tests for any type of hepatitis exposure, autoimmune disease etc and those tests just came out clean.  So guess I will just live with damage and hope it stops where it is.  Forget about ever drinking any more alcohol, not like I drank a lot any way.  I have to take yearly blood tests and keep tabs on the old liver to see what its up to.
hERNIASURGERY.jpg picture by epworthgirl Hernia Reapir Surgery 3-20-2007

Portia Nelson’s “Autobiography in Five Short Chapters,” 

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in
I am lost…I am helpless
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter 2
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter 4
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 5
I walk down another street.

 9-18-2007  This food addiction thing is an a** kicker, I fight with it daily on my life long journey.  Some days are just plain easier than others, today I just want to eat.......and thats just the way it is!  

9-19-2007  Sometime I wish I had gone ahead and got the RNY and I believe the weight loss would have been somewhat easier.  The dumping factor from sweets would have kept me on the straight and narrow.  My doctor said with my liver condition the RNY surgery would probably have killed me, I guess that surgery is a lot harder on the body than the surgery I went with.  Who knows? I am unbelievably hard on myself. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.............................................................  I need to be thankful for the weight loss I have achieved.

A person isn't finished when they're BEATEN . . .
     A person is finished when they QUIT.
                                                             ~ Anonymous

What my birthday means DECEMBER 8
Watch out Donald Trump! You've got a head for business and money.
You'll make it rich some day, even if you haven't figured out how yet.
A supreme individualist, you shouldn't get stuck in a corporate job.
Instead, make your own way - so that you can be the boss.

Your strength: Your undying determination

Your weakness: You require an opulent lifestyle

Your power color: Plum

Your power symbol: Dollar sign

Your power month: August

See my new blog spot at http://cathymcferrin.blogspot.com

About Me
Feb 20, 2005
Member Since

Friends 42